Come Get Y'all Juice

scientists are trying to discover something harder than getting out of bed to go to work in the morning. and dont make a fucking penis joke ok they already checked everyone’s dick and it doesn’t even come close

puts my uncomfortably wet hand on your shoulder. see here, gay boy- can i call you gay boy?

fuuuuck i forgot to give a shit about stupid bullshit that doesnt matter 🤦‍♀️

I think it’s very normal and cool and healthy even to leave work every day feeling like I’ve just survived a wild animal attack. I think 40 more years of this is good for me

As a transsexual woman 👩 who has had multiple experiences ‼️ I have found 🔎 that the biggest block of cheese 🧀 is usually the one ☝️ that has the largest size 📈

mature content

modern social media should stop offering "sync with your phone contacts to follow them" options and start offering "block all your phone contacts so they never see your account" options

my beautiful wife, severe thunderstorm warning, is texting me 😌😚😍😍

If you play your cards right when you die you get to be a poison ghost instead of a regular ghost