Thyme

still caring about internet friends you lost touch with years ago is so embarrassing. yeah i had a deam we met up irl recently. the last time we spoke was maybe 7-8 years ago. i still wear the laces we randomly decided was a sign of our friendship. i dont know what any of your socials are or if youre even active on any. sometimes i see someones art resemble yours and i wonder for hours. do you still go by that name you chose? whenever i see it i wonder if its you. we couldve passed each other in this vastness a thousand times and not have a clue.

we were lonely kids having fun together. do you remember?

if i had a dick i would love to have a disappointing orgasm in the shower while thinking of something or someone that i felt i should not be thinking about & then stand under the water with my forehead against a wall watching the proof of my guilt & shame go down the drain

The insight I get into the female mind thanks to this website is amazing.

not a female 👍

being a humanities major who’s friends with stem majors is so funny because you’ll ask your friends what they’re doing today and they’re like “UGH it’s so stressful i have to stabilize the reactor core for my nuclear power midterm and then i have to build the supercomputer from i have no mouth yet i must scream for my electrical engineering homework :/ what about you” and you’re like “oh well i have to read a fun little book and write an essay about gender.” and they still think you have it worse

Being a stem major who's friends with humanities majors is ALSO funny bc you ask what's goin on with them and they're like "oh yeah my day's pretty good! I only have to read 50 pages for this one class today and half a book for another one. It's much better than last week where I read three books and wrote a 10 page paper about their overlapping motifs for one class while also researching a niche period of time that our library doesn't have any resources on. How's it been for you?" and you're like "oh I have a lil packet of fun math puzzles due tomorrow." and they look at you like you're carrying the weight of the universe on your back

This is your reminder that just because something falls within the skillset you've practiced, so you can do it and you don't find it particularly hard or stressful relative to other things, it doesn't mean it isn't actually hard work you should be proud of yourself for accomplishing!

this applies to writing and art, too

I think they should make a fighting game where all of the characters are from the public domain

WHAT'S THIS? IT'S THE GREAT GATSBY WITH THE STEEL CHAIR

hold on

wheres winnie the pooh

i wish not to expose him to the horrors of combat

hes the announcer

the martian is about a commanding red headed lady saying "oh fuck that guy is in space let's get him let's grab him we need to acquire that guy from space and put him on earth we gotta we gotta." project hail mary is about a commanding red headed lady saying "jesus christ we need to punt that guy away from earth and into space with no hope of return asap he's gotta be Gone we must change his location from earth to space post haste here I've got my baseball bat ready."

Rocky on the trip back to Erid registering that Grace has defaulted to using he/him for him for sexism reasons and that they don't actually have to go by he/him. xe does some research on the human computer and spends several weeks cycling through different pronoun sets. starts switching so frequently Grace becomes convinced sie has started being difficult on purpose. after a while Grace is like omg will you just pick one and stick with it. Rocky is like okay i have decided. rock/rocks. rockself. Grace like well i can't argue with that.

Grace several years into their voyage, finally getting good enough at understanding Eridian to clock when Rocky has switched back to using the Neutral Tone for him, thereby implying that they are no longer friends: HEY??

I think the ways grace and rocky go about saying "hey don't be sad we are competent" are 1 really sweet and 2 sososo funny because grace, ever the teacher, will be like "hey don't be sad, I'm a science human, we'll figure it out together" and rocky will be like "oh my god stop crying you dumbass, I figured out how to solve the problem twenty minutes ago. lack of sleep is making you stupid. idiot." And they're both like, wow this is exactly what I needed to hear <3

remember when websites were written on purpose, and not generated by autocomplete in the instant you run the web search? anyway, unrelated, this webpage purporting to relay expert knowledge on which plants are safe for my snake's tank just told me I would know if he was biting them and getting irritated because he would start pawing at his mouth.

i mean, that sure would be a sign something was wrong

the plant that makes you grow extra legs

duke thomas spends 10+ years getting comics and growth and plot and hes "too new" and people "dont know him well enough". superboy prime gets five minutes of character development and hes suddenly a fan favorite getting shipped with every character under the sun. i hate this fandom.

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Dont announced your crimes over unsecured channels dumbass

I've spent the past month cooped up in a motel in Orange County planning my theft, before I steal the sign I will set off a cache of fireworks I've placed 5 blocks away from the nearest police station which will rain down on the pigs, the perfect diversion.