「I’m In The House Like Carpet」

Shit man, this wizard war is fucked. I just saw a guy clap his hands together and say "the ten hells" or some similar shit, and every one around him turned inside out, had their tibia explode and then disappeared. The camera didn't even go onto him, that's how common shit like this is. My ass is casting frostbite and level 2 poison. I think I just heard "power word:scrunch" two groups over. I gotta get the fuck outta here.

Oh 𝔽𝕌ℂ𝕂! You didn’t tell me you had a beast in your home. You’ve got a little goggyee. Eh- BOGGY. A poopy dog. A buppy- a little 𝐹𝑈𝐶𝐾𝐼𝑁𝐺 ƊOƐGGУ. I’ve never seen a reell dog before! We only have Lego® Dogs on Lego® Island. 𝒪𝒽! Oh FUCK! Oh fuck nooo! This red bastard’s got teeth! Sharp teethh. He’s going to tear me into little Lego® pieces. I’ve never been so scared in my life! WHAT THE FUCK this is like a jumpscare from Five Fuckers at Uncle Festers. GET ME THE  𝔽𝕌ℂ𝕂  OUT OF HERE!

Every time I think of this I have to watch it

i want to be as healthy and as beautiful as a grazing wild ox.

wild oxen are smelly and gross

Then smell me, be disgusted by me, I am freely myself. I am me.

has anyone ever died from gooning

When my old gooning buddy Jake was going thru the hardest sesh of his life he was going mad and shit because he was clogged as fuck and he started deastroying shit since he couldnt get that sweet release he was trying to get for days i shit u not our sesh lasted 5 days straight and it wasnt until he took the 6th tina puff on the final day when the devil inside him awakened and i could see it in his eyes it was time for me to put him down old yellar style so that was when i knocked him out with my megaton blast punch to knock him out and then i brought him to my drive way to run him over til he was gone for good sorry buddy but its the way to have to be

STOP SPEEDRUNNING MY TOWER YOU INGRATES

*mashes the skip dialogue button*

tf2 heritage post

okay but you thinking it tastes good doesn’t excuse how fucked up the milk industry is or make it okay to support lmao y’all selfish 

World Heritage Post