honestly this is what i meant when i say to get weirder with rocktiz

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@theorigamiphoenix
honestly this is what i meant when i say to get weirder with rocktiz

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is this anything
you are always telling lies
elephants are hunted for their jumping slime, which is used to produce trampolines and the runways of airplanes
me: if only there was a fruit that looks like an apple but is actually a pear
the baffling papple:
🌾🌾🌾
Harvesting my wheat
Hehehehehe
Can I fucking help you?
my senior english teacher told me that any scene with a woman in a cornfield in every piece of literature ever is about her journey to womanhood/pleasuring herself in the field and i just.... believed her
What
What

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Complex video game moral choices
Say you break your ankle. You could know everything there is to know intellectually about the injury. Even with this vast knowledge, you will still experience physical pain.
Now take this logic and apply it to things like ADHD, autism, clinical depression, and other less visible/divergent disabilities. You cannot think your way out of feeling.
That is to say: you are not a bad, lazy, or selfish person for struggling, even if you know why you are struggling.
Genuinely, thank you so much for this.
This is what it’s like living in Michigan
It’s a Monty Python skit.
Guy: *Singing* I’m doing some fishing…
Officer: *Emerges from the water with a grunt* You there, Sir!! I certainly hope you’ve got a fishing license!
Guy: *Panicking* Wha, no, I don’t!
Officer: Oh no?
Guy: *Screaming*
Officer: I’ll have you beheaded!!
As a Michigan native, I confirm this is all true.
BE NICE HAVE FUN
Reblog this photo of a käpylehmä to have a käpylehmä in your blog
It's a trick! If you reblog you get TWO käpylehmäs in your blog!

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
Whatever else you can say about Johnny Mnemonic, you have to give it credit for establishing "the best hacker in town is a dolphin, and no, that's not some weird Canadian drug culture slang, we mean a literal dolphin" as a recurring trope in the cyberpunk genre.
(If anything, it's a failure of the broader genre that it didn't take the trope and run with it rather than merely replicating it verbatim. I want to read a cyberpunk story where the protagonists have to negotiate with a deep web data broker who turns out to be an ex-military cyborg parrot.)
I have a background character who is an orca that got crippled / blown up by an unsecured ocean mine, and then accidentally won a lawsuit against a combined corpstate class action defendant which inadvertently granted full territorial rights of the planetary oceans to orcas, who runs a coffee bar and uses a many-years defunct armored personnel carrier as a mobility aid, and is funding a law suit to help a sentient military robot with rat brains try to sue and be recognized as a person, which is going terribly because no one wants all the ratbots to suddenly qualify as people.
How convenient it is to attach small, useful objects to your clothes at waist level
higgledy piggledly,
quite unabashedly
i love this format,
it never goes goes wrong
its variants are catchy
and well executed
unlike those lampooning
the general's song
#higgledy piggledy / down-low and furtively / here in the tags i continue the bit#who knows if you'll read it? / it's really not needed / my own satisfaction is why i won't quit
Higgledy piggledy
out into sunlight come
these tags hid sneakily
under the post
Dredged to the surface
by cunning observers here
and now they're peer-reviewed
I'll give up the ghost
Proust’s Questionnaire – 35 Questions Every Character Should Answer
Marcel Proust was born on 10 July 1871 and died on 18 November 1922. He is best known for writing In Search of Lost Time, also published in English as Remembrance of Things Past. Learn more about Proust’s Questionnaire, a famous set of personality questions. Use it as a writing tool to create deeper, more memorable characters.
Marcel Proust's questionnaire is one of the best-known interviews used in the media It is thoughtful, fun, and concise - and a great tool fo
getting kicked off love island for just swimming in the pool and not talking to anyone
So fun fact from when I worked on multiple reality shows, names redacted for NDA purposes.
Gay people are INCREDIBLY ANNOYING for production when they are on reality shows cause they always do shit like this. Reality shows pick their cast specifically for people who will create drama, so it tracks that bringing in some gay people (in the era that I worked, 2013-2018, this was considered to be new and interesting) would diversify people enough to create some conflict. To a degree, this was true.
But what actually happened was that the gay person, or worse, people, would end up estranged from the other people because Straight People Who Are Fucking Nuts in a way that would be ideal for a reality show are very different from Gay People Who Are Fucking Nuts.
There's one particular instance I remember in which our Gay Person tm wasn't getting into drama and no one could figure out why. Any time anything happened it would just defuse almost instantly. Eventually we prodded during a solo interview and one of the guys said something along the lines of "Mayn gay marriage just got legalized n shit if I yell at this guy I'm being a homophobe". This meant that our gay was COASTING along in this reality show cause no one would vote him out!!
But you know what the PINNACLE of this was?
DATING SHOWS.
One... Very popular dating show I worked on (you know the one) has an unofficial, unwritten rule: you can only have 1 queer woman in the cast of ladies. This is because for a solid few years, if ever there were two bisexual women in the show, they would ALWAYS abandon the man and run off together instead. You can't have contestants saying shit like "this guy has no personality and sucks ass. I prefer this girl I met who actually listens to me". Like this was an actual epidemic in the casting. It happened over and over for YEARS and they couldn't find a way to stop it without literally separating the women from each other, which obviously wouldn't be good for the show. They also couldn't show this was happening because that. Uh. Would be pretty bad to reveal to audiences.
Eventually they just decided to subtly prod and see if women who were going on the show were gay and then avoid having two on the same season at the same time. To my knowledge they still do it this way.
Anyways the summary is that gay people are fucking crazy in a way that heterosexual tv just does not know how to handle
I love(hate) how their first solution was to be blatantly biphobic
instead of getting men that don't suck

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i just know there was a weird little girl in the middle ages out there stealing snake's eggs and putting them in her family's chicken coop in the hope of hatching a basilisk
god i love the internet because if i said shit like this to people irl they'd probably just stare at me blankly but when i post it online everyone in the notes reacts like this
So, I lurk in some writer subreddits, and a frequent topic of discussion is prose: what constitutes good prose, how do you write it, how do you improve it, etc. And yesterday I stumbled across one topic about the difference between good descriptive prose, and purple prose. OP asks people to share some of their favourite authors who they think write beautiful prose without tipping into purple. No problem; people are happy to oblige.
One person says that Steinbeck is one of their favourite authors for prose, and then they share an example of what they would consider purple prose. It is so violetly awful that I think the poster must have written it themselves as a kind of parody of purple prose. Other people assumed the same.
But as it turns out, they are quoting from a book written by a YouTuber whose channel ia dedicated to talking about writing (namely, their own writing, which is genius, but often not comprehensible to the drooling plebs).
Naturally, I read the free sample of their book in awe and horror, and I'd like to share some screenshots with you. If you also have trouble defining or understanding what purple prose is, it's this.
Yes, every single fucking page is written like this.
Reading some more of the preview for this book, and I realise this is by far not the biggest problem, but I'm begging this guy to just use 'shadow' instead of 'umbra'. I promise I will not accuse you of being a philistine.
'Noctilucent orbs'. Even fanfic written by a 14-year-old wouldn't dare.
The author is a man in his 30s, btw.
*throws this in the face of everyone who has ever accused me of writing purple prose*
I thought the Amelia Peabody series was purple. I owe the author an apology. Uffda
I lost it at the pulsating nose, then again at the contracting cheekbones