the long awaited sequel
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PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
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@heartsnbruises
the long awaited sequel

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So I had both the fortune and misfortune of being born to two people at the exact center of the bell curve in Most demographic respects— they are white, able-bodied cishet suburbanites— who happen to have a good bit more money than is sensible. This has made them deranged in several very predictable rich people ways— they identify themselves as "Upper Middle Class", they are cheap about dumb shit like buying in bulk and then continuing to eat that food once it expires rather than throwing it out, my father thinks insurance is a scam to steal your money, etc.
So when my husband and I decided to move to the city— specifically to a city with a high Black population, bc that sure isnt irrelevant — my parents became very concerned about Crime. My father got very worried when we asked for the bars that blocked fire escape routes to be removed and gave us several cans of mace that we have given a place of honor still wrapped at the bottom of a shelf somewhere. After the move I got asked a lot of questions about if I was hearing Strange Noises at night (no, on the record). My father was convinced because there were unoccupied houses on our street that we were going to Die.
So all of this primes me for today, when my husband tells me me our grocery delivery is on the porch. I open the door. It is not on the porch. We have a mutual "Well, shit" moment and some confusion because we have a VERY loud dog— my husband had locked the outer door (its a grate) by accident so the delivery guy hadn't been able to knock on the inner door, and so there had not been barking, so it'd taken us half an hour to get out there. I go Well, Shit, lesson learned. Here there be porch pirates. I guess this is what city living is like. I go to shower.
No sooner have I stripped and gone down to get a towel then there is a knock on the door. Dog loses it. I throw on a robe and get the door. It is our neighbor, who was told by another neighbor that we'd left our groceries out, and who'd picked them up to take them inside for us so they didn't get stolen. I pad out there barefoot, in my robe, and he gives me the groceries and as I struggle to get the two bags and keep the robe closed and get the door and keep the dog from running out to make friends and thank him profusely, he's calling "you got it? You need help?"
So, yknow. I guess this is what city living is like. Suburbanites are fucking stupid.
“I was on a strict diet during Episode VIII, and she was like, ‘Kid, get into that fridge and take some chocolate bars. I have many there.’ And I did,” he recalls. “I failed my diet because Carrie Fisher told me to. And it [felt] great.”
-John Boyega on Carrie Fisher
This is the Carrie Fisher post of body positivity reblog for a chocolate bar from her fridge
Support the Gainesville Free Store
Hi! The city of Gainesville, Florida is one of the worst places in America to be homeless, but the good news is that it's also in the middle of an apocalyptic housing crisis. One of the community initiatives helping ease the pressure on Gainesville's impoverished, racialized, and over-policed communities is the Gainesville Free Store, run out of the beloved Civic Media Center and Stetson Kennedy Library. On the 3rd Saturday, the Gainesville Free Store sets up to distribute donations of clothes, shoes, housewares, toys, and anything else one might need, all free of charge. A lot of people depend on the Free Store, especially with the weather getting colder and the holidays coming up, and with the way things are going it looks like Gainesville is gonna be needing its Free Store more and more as time goes on. They could use some help!
Donations of goods can be made at the Civic Media Center at 433 South Main Street, but these can only accepted while the store is operational (every 3rd Saturday: check Facebook and Instagram for specific dates / requested donations)
The overwhelming majority of the people reading this almost certainly don't live anywhere near Gainesville, Florida, but they accept monetary donations! Kick your spare change over to https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/cmc4ever or https://account.venmo.com/u/cmc4ever and put "For the Free Store" in the note (don't worry if u forget -- unspecified donations to the CMC will go to the upkeep of the space!)
Reblog this post! Getting more eyes on this project would be super helpful all on its own! Share it far and wide!
I'll try and remember to do a fresh reblog of this with an announcement about the next Free Store event each time it goes up, so don't forget to check the notes <3
forgot to post it here

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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The US senate is such a gaggle of old fucks that the old fuck everyone was sure dropped dead last week wasn't even the old fuck that dropped dead last week
My personal headcanon for Ash Ketchum has always been that regardless of if his dream ever came true he'd never truly stop traveling and learning. Because despite "becoming a pokemon master" being his goal if you actually sit down and watch like Any episode of Pokemon the thing that always holds true is his curiosity and desire to learn everything he possibly can related to pokemon. And he'll try anything to! He did contests and the battle frontier. He'd do those silly little shows with Serena if they'd let him.
So I like to imagine him continuing on in life as this nomad who people don't automatically recognize as anyone important ya know? Just this goofy guy going from place to place always lending a helping hand and hes got a cute lil pikachu on him. And hes often lost somewhere with a friend just exploring the woods to see if he'll find anything cool. Ya know, as hes always been, but older now. And its only once hes drifted once more do you maybe stumble into an article on the pokeweb about him and are like... that guy??
there’s a dedicated ashandpikachuspotter account somewhere on some social media. You tag a photo or search for a term and boom, there’s pics of this guy. this dude. this man. with his pikachu. and it’s thousands of strangers from across the globe coming on line to talk about some stranger that they met briefly and then never saw again. they’ve compiled their stories and their approximate locations and mapped his journey from continent to continent, a long snaking pathway that spans decades and thousands of miles. He’s apparently one of those Kanto kids that the government let just drop out of school. Its working out very well for him.
Thats so funny, to imagine him as a pokeweb criptid type character a la the florida man
the one thing about him is he's also not gonna think he's famous or ever mention it himself
Pokemon Heritage Post
they had 19 year old /pol/ users going through all federal spending and deleting anything where the words were too big to understand

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
i need to at some point get a mid/low poly model of my sona so i can model swap him in games and play through them
imagining playing Bayonetta 2 with a Bulph model is sending me
who here knows how to make video game models? Like mid to low poly ones. im so serious
Gotta go with the GOAT, @b0tster
#artists
Edited for all my writer friends out there
Get the latest news and live updates on the Trump administration as Republicans scramble to find replacement for Lindsey Graham and McConnel
Why is this bullshit allowed. The ghoul died and is replaced with his sister. We’re supposed to at least have the illusion of not being run by aristocracy
To my 25 - 35 year olds, you've reached the age where people around you are starting to give up on themselves because they think it's too late. Don't let that energy rub off on you. It's not too late.
I became a tattoo artist at 49.
Married the love of my life at 50.
Got my Class A CDL at 59.
You've got time.
As long as you're breathing, you've got time.
i honestly don't really understand why "some people prefer watching gameplay online rather than playing games themselves" is treated as such a taboo when being a spectator is considered a pretty mundane way to engage with most sports, game shows, reality tv or even just like. chess.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Smiling seeing cute kid/baby videos but then suddenly ain’t shit funny bc why are you posting your kids on the internet you dumb bitch take this shit down now don’t fucking do that
Imagine your bike has been at the Wright Brother’s repair shop for weeks and you see Orville suddenly whiz over your head in a contraption