biology of a stapler
some more speculative staplings

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@heartsnbruises
biology of a stapler
some more speculative staplings

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
duuuuuude you have GOT to come out tonight we're enacting cruelty upon those who have transgressed so badly that we can justify any act against them... and you KNOW we're interpreting our delight as moral righteousness... Yeah it's fucking crazyyyyyyy get an Uber
I really love those posts of people showing their stuffed animals various things and locations, gonna start doing that
showing my giant ground sloth the Feather River and the Feather River Fish Hatchery fish ladder
showing my cat the location of the last stagecoach hold-up in San Mateo County
showing my sockeye salmon The Gates Of Hell
showing my humpback whale Methuselah the coast redwood
showing my banana slug the grave of Emperor Norton
showing my tiger the geographic center of California
showing my elephant seal a spirit photograph
showing my javalina the 1906 earthquake fence
Using Fey Law as a heavy-handed metaphor for corporate IP copyright
Saying their name will draw their attention.
Using their likeness will spark their ire.
Encroachment upon their domain will earn punishment beyond earthly tithe.
The consequences of their regard may be intangible and long-lasting.
Rarely, you may earn their approval, but it is not worth the risk.
You must ask their permission, which is rarely granted.
Once they have you, they will not let you go for a hundred years.
You must be clever and use trickery and wordplay to evade them.
The master of each domain has their own unique and fickle nature, and some are more forgiving than others.
One must use titles and euphemisms to discuss them without their notice- IE, "The Rat", "The Bird Website"
Starting a mass movement to refer to specific Tylwyth Teg by name until they lose their power and become common household standards like Kleenex and Velcro
Spreading legend of The Rodent In Red Pants Who Walks Upright On Hind Legs Like a Man and if you sully his Good and kindly Name then great misfortune will befall you and you will never be heard from again
Y'know what, Lindsey Graham has earned this

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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“my father is a boy and my mother is a girl so i’m mixed” is the funniest possible response to someone asking your gender and it came from 6’5 Viking footballer and notable weird little guy Erling Haaland on a Snapchat
comedians can only dream of writing something this funny
Amir: Google stop showing me sex ads! I know there are desperate sluts in the area. I HAVE A MIRROR!
we should mandate industrial themed nonbinary names to balance out all of the people naming themselves after trees. throw Anvil into the mix
You unlock secret dialogue by being open about your kinks with friends
you unlock hidden events too

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
According to fox entertainment this is who we should be afraid of. I didn't know who Francesca Hong was 10 minutes ago but thankfully now I'm aware of this monster and her monsterous policies
Sometimes I'll be looking at bullshit online that I know will just rile me up and I have to think of this image to get myself to stop
Supermassive Black Hole lends itself to soundtracking one thing and one thing alone and that is a strip club. Supermassive Black Hole is the most perfect strip club rock song I've ever heard. I've heard rock songs *about* strip clubs that feel less suited to a strip club than Supermassive Black Hole. I have heard songs where sex is explicitly described in the lyrics that feel less sexy than Supermassive Black Hole. Supermassive Black Hole is a song so disgustingly, flagrantly, enticingly slutty that I sometimes feel legitimately shocked that it was made by a band that most people make fun of for sounding like if Radiohead sold out after their first album. It is a crowning achievement in stripper music that may never be topped in our lifetime. It is best known for soundtracking the scene in the first Twilight movie where they play baseball.
My writing advice is to be so, so fucking annoying with it.
That one post about the art teacher who hated this glittery glam lisa frank style a student was cultivating but was like, "stop holding back, make me loathe your work," same thing.
I give terrible advice when cannot sleep.
Never let people tell you what stupid things to write about, only let people tell you if the stupid things you're writing about are comprehensible.
Let me explain hold on.
Okay this is how the first thing I got published reads:
Unwillin’ly selectin’ this place o’my cotton platen ill suits t’pursuit o’debts old ’n’ futures bold. Better lives’n mine sick’n’ past t’way o’ reckless radburns ’n’ here me wi’out a scrap o’ modesty ’gainst ’em. Contrawise, t’painen my bones is sharp ’n’ bright ‘swell as t’rads. E’en closed I spy t’yoovee rads through m’lids.
Here's another opening:
Not rest nor dream, devices consumed. Kay's else-where-looking than its mirror-face, + naked optic. Device has not will nor judgement consumed. Kay's aware of this, Kay's never escaping devices' contempt. Devices record threads, devices loop threads + spin-endless. Devices thread no contempt.
A different thing:
Nothing Tastes Better, the food memory experience, promised to deliver a complete experience of healthy and relaxed meal time memories, Breakfast of the CarribeoAmerican Limited Corporate Islands flavor, is how Anna Yubari, Vice President and COO of Marketing and Strategic Product Placement at Revlon-Johnson North America Group LLC starts the memory of the day which will b'had b'her. The team scrum Mid-Day Annual Projected Growth Strategic Planning Forum is being prepared for b'her. Waking in an enormous bed of soft sewn artificial gooselike down processed featherproduct, where it happens a tray is received b'her and full of polished brown tone number 8 Walnotlike polywood overflowing with Fruit Belief pineapple flavor texture chews, a Nearly Egg nemlette of single sourced Cheese Cube artificial cheese material, Avojoy spread, Microcrum pressed self warming Toast slathered in polyglide flavor pats, a tall glass of champagne, and other delights, a sumptuously delightful and work efficient experience exists as knowledge inside the mind've her. The post power quarter five minute attentive nap taken between close've business and opening Quarter Daily Projection Update is fully excluded b'her. Thanks to LifeAdapt BalanceFlo's DataDRV Learning Model Driven VirtWork encasement, metaphorical and virtual desk used b'Anna is able t'be occupied almost continuously for any number've days or hours b'her. Streamlined data projection and growthflo updates from QDPU are automatically adjusted to most networked wireless holistic system organization growth notice outputs though utilizing muscle twitch responses've body've her. Stocklist Frangible growth maturation vat are used to apply information mismatch updating revisions b'her, and info mismatch non-liably incurred through uncoded movement tracking t'predict input algorithms are additionally updated and revised b'her.
Even:
With my hammered steel plate warming my chest up, my flip-flops against the ground glass, my hair a-blazes in the midnight red giant second star sun. I got five coffins loaded with a death for every one of ya, so who wants it first?
I am determined to be annoying, but I regularly need to have people talk me down to being coherent.
It's also possible the explosion or the coma or both damaged my brain

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
Sha-POW! ARTFIGHT WEEK 2!
https://artfight.net/attack/16239202.antler-pals
Kaylee and Drifter Minna in her semi-transformed state. One-handed cryptid weirdo antler buddies 4 lyfe!
@total-trash-tenno
@ritasanderson's Ersatz OC, Lucerne! Love me some religious iconography and body horror elements, so I had to whip out the fancypants gold acrylic for some details. I'd love to come back to this in the future and really refine it.
An art gifting game
And finally, @windkonig's great Eyetooth having a bit of a time of it at the beach. I had prepped a list of Situations to Put That OC Into, and rolled up "Cursing Out a Flock of Seagulls" for this delightful creature!
https://artfight.net/attack/16231737.eyetooth-at-the-beach
the long awaited sequel