BEHOLD! ART! @heartsnbruises - Tumblr Blog

No wisdom from me this week, I don't know WHAT MY ISSUE IS

ADHD Alien Graphic Novel & Stream here: https://linktr.ee/adhdalien

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oddarette

Yep, I made a frutiger aero soft soap alien… 💧🐠🤍🫧🧼

celaquinn-ichard

The cleanomorph

berkeleygirl3

disquiet-dream

dio brando would be so much happier if he was in vampire the masquerade instead of jojo's bizarre adventure

disquiet-dream

he wants to be doing ruthless vampire politics so bad but he's getting punched to death by a guy with Powers instead

were--ralph

i don't want boy pussy i want Man CUNT i want that pussy that's gonna grab my dick and shake it FIRM like a job interview

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yms1

what doesn't kill you makes you stay on tumblr for 13 years and counting

noah-wyles

podcastwizard

LIKES TO CHARGE REBLOGS TO CAST

karen-writes

Ways to fix writer's block

OPTION 1: Try turning the writer on and off (it works)

OPTION 2: if option 1 doesn't work, try putting the writer in rice.

nalivaa

the mexican football team has a 17 yrs old player and one of the funniest outcomes of this is that he cannot appear in any ad for gambling or drinking so he only appears in candy and milk advertisements. his first world cup and he's not even legally allowed to drive. his nickname is "morita" (little berry). he's three apples tall.

lelouch

they couldn't put him in the beer campaign so he was represented by a bunch of berries

what-even-is-thiss

I love listening to really old music. Dude’s bragging about how long he can have sex with a full brass band behind him.

what-even-is-thiss

20s-60s pop music be like “I’m gonna cuck every man in town because I have a great tongue” *sick piano solo*

sam-sometimes-wise

People are like, "Pop culture was so innocent back then!"

meanwhile every time a refined old crooner mentions a woman's "charms" you can basically imagine that "sexyback" by Justin Timberlake just started playing in the background.

"someone to hold in my arms/and know the magic of her charms" yeah sure mister bobby darin that sounds like a wholesome retro activity

people have always been people. they've always been doing the same things.

bettermetalgoat

People pearl clutching over songs like WAP: ”Songs were so wholesome and clean back then. Not like NOW!”

Lucille Bogan in the 1920s about to drop the raunchiest song she can think of: “I got a song about fucking and it’s not going to beat around the bush about it. Gonna open with a line about my titties.”

what-even-is-thiss

You weren’t kidding

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calder

mothman does not exist. some people saw some owls and UAPs and freaked out.

early sightings describe multiple creatures; that is not as snappy as MothMan. people thought he came from TNT dumped in the river; he is a mutant, he is our sins. he appeared to them in dreams. he haunted them for decades. the mothman ruined people's lives. some people believe the mothman saved their lives.

mothman became the subject of Fortean fascination because the way in which he does not exist is fascinating.

my connection to the mothman is the closest thing i have to religion.

he is as suitable a symbol as any for my belief that we fundamentally cannot understand the true nature of reality, and that we are lucky for the times in which we understand ourselves and one another.

human consciousness is connected to the universe in a way that is unique and scary and beautiful and absurd and farcical.

every year i arrive the night before the festival to revel and meditate with the statue until sunrise and there is no irony in it. every year when i leave i smack its gigantic metal ass so hard my hand hurts and i mean every slap.

sniperct

tumblr waiting for news on mitch mcconnell (image source)

flarebean

Eleanor reaching out to an alternate universe to eleanors who did not get framed up: wow... she is living the life i didn't... she invites me to sit with her under the moonlight... i can live free knowing other me's walk the other paths...

Lyon being reached out to across time by other harrows: who are you. why does the bell toll for you, my brothers. #ourtormentandsuffering

d897gyhaujfkedw7r9euwijkjfkdl

Walking into my 9 hour shift and hearing "2 people quit yesterday"

d897gyhaujfkedw7r9euwijkjfkdl

what-even-is-thiss

Gosh I wish motorcycles weren’t death machines they look so fun

what-even-is-thiss

My dad isn’t one of those parents that is like you’re gonna be rich and you’re gonna be a doctor or whatever. He only has three conditions. 1. Don’t get involved in organized crime 2. Don’t join the military and 3. Don’t drive a motorcycle

Problem is though. Motorcycles look so fun.

what-even-is-thiss

So in the US they say there’s a 1% chance of getting in a motorcycle accident. That’s just per year though. If you stretch that over 20 years that gets up to like 18.3% which is a much higher gamble when you think about it. And motorcyclists make up 15% of fatal accidents while only representing 6% of vehicles.

They look so fun though.

what-even-is-thiss

MOTORCYCLE CRASH FATALITY RATES

#I know you're firmly ensconced in NO MOTORCYCLES #But a LOT of those fatalities happen cuz the riders are dumb as fuck and don't wear their HELMETS #Or other proper riding gear #I respect your respect for the Mechanical Horse #It's just that a lot of people are stupid

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dragongirlsweetie

pro tip you can just grab a bunch of random parts from dumpsters and hardware stores and computer stores and just attach them together haphazardly and then put it in your suitcase and take it to the airport and get arrested pretty much 100% of the time

divorcedwife

studying history is like. here's to another beautiful day of not being pregnant and of having no obligation to ever be. thank you women who fight for abortion and contraception and independance from men for another beautiful day of not being pregnant and of having no obligation to ever be

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