bro ur vibes

the mexican football team has a 17 yrs old player and one of the funniest outcomes of this is that he cannot appear in any ad for gambling or drinking so he only appears in candy and milk advertisements. his first world cup and he's not even legally allowed to drive. his nickname is "morita" (little berry). he's three apples tall.

[ID. A beer advertisement with a row of cans, each with the face of a player from Mexico's men's football team, except for the aforementioned morita. There is a small pile of berries beside the last of the beer cans, which has been highlighted with a red circle. End ID.]

as per my last straw,

There is no greater bond on this earth than when you all despise and carry untold righteous anger about one person and then when you’re all together someone is like “so about that dead horse” and everyone starts sounding like Michael Jackson with the way they’re chanting beat it

can you lez the fuck in

being an adult is always like i have to go to the store i have to go to the store i have to go to the store

i understand why cats just sit and stare at nothing

Im always like "i will not add my two cents. i will not add my two cents" but i cant lie the pennies are getting sweaty in my hand

i'm a little late to the game and tbh admittedly was a bit lazy a while ago (had other shit going on etc) so does anyone have a hack for reaping? without sowing anything i mean. like did i miss my chance or

hi yeah i know ive been on this medication for 8 years but i need-- yeah. yeah 3 more months please. I'll call you in 3 months to beg for 3 more months, thanks. Bye. Love you.

Im sorry but you need to come in person for a checkup to make sure you actually need the medication you’ve been taking for 8 years