I really shouldn't judge people...But I'll do it anyway.

those other guys are just roleplaying. i'm a real freak. i don't trust tapwater. i'm inbred. smoking me out is like trying to smoke out a warehouse. i get drunk off of 2 beers. i'm scared of Walmart. ever had real freak before? you will immediately feel the difference. the ride is smoother, the controls are more responsive. you've been driving shopping carts until now. are you in the right headspace to hear some shit like "batter up!" before you get fucked? i'm 5 foot 6. i don't have insurance. i'm trying to move to your state before we even enter the talking phase. i'll get a passport to fuck. you think you can have it all with a genuine freak? have it writ upon thy meagre grave. i escaped from a lab where scientists work round the clock creating artificial life- genetically bioengineered to drive your pussy insane. ready for a real freak? once you've seen the stroke you can never go back. my ears ring 24/7. all i do is train. spending a night with me is like spending a night doing the super mario 64 speedrun stair glitch. send me an email.

my corner store guy is a 50 year old man who's my best friend in the world and recently he was like "you're too pretty to be single I have some nephews you should meet. very handsome!" and I was like "a niece might be more up my alley" and he just got more excited and said "ah even better! I was overselling my nephews but my nieces are very beautiful"