Events happened, so I am changing my life...

There was an advert on there for an intolerance test for 47 quid. Tests over 700 things to see if you have intolerances to any of those things. I am REALLY considering having it done do I know what i can and can't eat.

I am fairly certain I have an intolerance to bananas, but I think i also have it with oats too, which is super annoying as I love both those things!

CW-247lbs (17 stone 9lbs)

GW-147lbs (10 stone, 7lbs)

100lbs to go! Yay! Been a while since I got here. Soon, it will be in double digits and that is seriously something for me to celebrate. For absolutely ages, about 2 years or so, my goal has been losing around 130ish lbs, so to be really near minus 100 lbs to go, that is utterly fantastic for someone like me who has struggled all my life with my weight.

I have always had excuses. Ans this year has been no different, but things have changed a lot for me this year, namely my transition to a vegan lifestyle and 3 close family members dying in the space of 3 months.

Running around after my folks too as they have been unwell most the year so my weight has come off from helping them, also eating a bit less often than usual and cutting down on snacks has helped too.

Started over on Monday, and have managed to stay vegan, and have also successfully been doing some intermittent fasting this week. Strangely, I have not been overly hungry and have not been drinking loads of water to fend of the hunger.

I can only assume that my body is adjusting to its new regime and I intend to keep at it. Like i said in my last post, I need to sort my life the fuck out and get on track.

I want to lose around 7 stone (119lbs I think...) so I need to get cracking. I have set myself the goal of this to be done by the time I am 40 (which is scarily only 2 years away) as I do kot want to be fat for the rest of my life and I want to be as healthy as possible.

And by "today I fucked up" I mean this WEEK I fucked up. All my plans have gone to shit and everything took a back seat. But, as they say, onwards and upwards. But even after falling off the wagon, I have learned a few things.

Firstly, dairy does not sit well with me. My skin has broken out and I cannot stop farting.

Second, my energy levels are in the bin. I cannot believe how tired I have gone.

And lastly, I can't also believe how shitty all round I feel - guts don't feel right, head feels muzzy and I am feeling really depressed.

Yes, i have been eating like i used to partly, but i had more bad news this week and it kind of sent me over the edge. I am now using this weekend to sort myself out and get back on the wagon as of tomorrow. What turned out to be a total fuck up turned into me learning something about myself and that something is that I need to continue with my veganism as I start feeling like total shit when I stop doing it.

And, I think i need to start getting back into my fasting habits to try and hive myself some self control. I am trying to also lose some weight before my birthday and I want to make that happen, and I know that all I need to do is eat right and stop pigging out.

It can be easier aaid than done sometimes as temptation can be really strong, especially when you are having a rough time like I did. Its not an excuse, but i know what happens when I stop being a good boy. I become a bad boy and feel like shit. I will try harder to stop that, no matter what comes my way.

I am a firm believer that if someone tells you something, don't blindly believe it and do your own research, draw your own conclusions and work out, for yourself, whether you then think they are right or not. Be open minded and listen to their points, discuss and find out why they think the way they do, and then in your own time, do your research and agree, disagree or discuss your own views further and see what you can come up with.

When it came to my dad, you could not have a rational discussion with him about most things, and his mind was always made up before you had even finished what you were saying. I was talking generally about what I was learning about alternative milks, and my dad asked if I drank almond milk.

I told him that I didn't and he asked me why. I started my sentence with "The reason I don't is because they are not ethically sourced properly..." and my dad - he rolled his eyes, let out a huge sigh and was about to give up listening, but i ended my sentence with "because during pollination, lots of bees are killed in the process of that...." My dad just shot me a look and said "Really?" Yes, i replied and started to explain. 

Netflix ran a series called Rotten, and it shows a dark side to the honey industry, and one of the things they do, is take a LOT of beehives up to California over the months of Jan and Feb (iirc) and then the bees go out and pollinate all the almond trees so the almonds can grow and be harvested some weeks later, and given that most of the worlds almonds come from that region, its understandable why they do it. But, it’s at this point you find out - people steal the beehives, colonies can die off because they are out working in the cold, some people were even burning hives, and bees were getting very unfairly treated.

My dad was a HUGE fan of bees. One his dreams was to become a beekeeper as it was one of the few things he strongly believed in, and that they are the key workers for the planet. Which is true - no bees, no food for us - so that was his way of wanted to do his bit for the environment. It’s funny, but my dad was not a real environmentalist, but it was nice to see that was something he really cared about.

This was one of the reasons I stopped drinking almond milk, but the main reason is two fold...

1. It tastes fucking awful

2. Oat milk tastes WAY better and has a more nutrient dense profile.

As I posted Friday, you read my story. But what I am annoyed about now is how since my father died, I have educated myself immensely on veganism, and more specifically the whole foods plant based diet (known hereafter as WFPB) and how it can pretty much turn cancer off. Watching unsupersize me, game changers, dominion, earthling Ed, Gary Yourofsky and a few other bits, i know that the secret, as far as health for me in the future goes, is out of the bag.

And more to the point, how people high up in the govt know about it and yet, are more concerned with lining their own damn pockets with money than caring about what happens to people as they pollute their bodies with food so bad that they get sick and have to shell out a fortune on healthcare, or just live a life that could be so much better than the one they end up with (and i may cover that in a future post for further clarification...)

And it all boils down to diet.

"Let food be thy medicine, and let medicine be thy food." Hippocrates.

Even back then, they knew about food. And how when you eat shit, you feel like it. And nothing could be more true these days. But i believe the WFPB to be the most powerful weapon in the fight against poor health, cancer, type 2 diabetes, coronary artery disease, etc... you name it, it will fix it. Apart from obvious exceptions like type 1 diabetes and others like that, it cannot fix everything, but it is certainly not to be underestimated.

I cant help but wonder if it would have been able to help my dad and whether he would still be around. Coulda, shoulda, woulda... i guess now I will never know. But, i will be adopting it over the coming days/weeks so if I end up living a long life, I know it will be down to that as the fellas in my family don't seem to make it much past 60 odd. And its cancer. All of them. Scary, but, after learning more and more lately, I know its the right move for me, and my wife who will be joining me on this journey too.

I realise this whole post is a bit rambly, but it makes sense to me. WFPB and a vegan lifestyle is the best combo that I have learned about this year.

It is a question that some of you may be asking, as it is a bit extreme to go from eating a keto/primal diet to going vegan all of a sudden.

First, I have not used tumblr in AGES. About 18 months or so, and a lot can, and did, change between then and now.

Second, it is a change of lifestyle that I have embraced over a period of that time and maybe a little longer. I will try to explain...

Christmas 2018, me and the wife were looking into veganism as we thought it would be something we would try for our new years resolutions. We failed. Miserably. But, her mum had bought us a recipe book as a present and we thought we would just be able to crack on with it.

Work got in the way. Life got in the way. We forgot about the book and life went on from there. But in the background of life and work, we talked about it as the vegan revolution was starting (with things like veganuary 2019 made me take lots interest in it)

Skip towards veganuary 2020 and i started looking very seriously into it as it was becoming more and more appealing. And so did the wife on and off.

Then the unthinkable happened - in February 2020, we found out my dad had stage 4 metastatic lung cancer that had spread all round his body and had been told he had 3-6 months to live. After picking my jaw up off the floor, me and my wife had to put our lives on hold so we could look after him and my mum too as she has MS and my dad was her sole carer. Things were shit. Really fucking shit.

But, i was still doing my research. I looked after my dad and did my best to cut out what I could from my diet about May onwards. And then, fathers day 2020, my dad died. Dead. Gone. At a mere 63 years old. I was sad, but i had done a LOT of grieving during that period and when I thought i was going to go off the deep end into a drug and drink binge to end all binges, i didn't. I realised, i need to ensure that I live for longer than he did. And in my current state, a heart attack or diabetes is on the way, so i went vegan. My life changed from that moment onwards.

A few hiccups came along the way, and the odd weekend turned into a non vegan weekend. Especially after my fathers brother also died from pancreatic cancer. Life is so shit. But, i still turned back to my veganism and life went forward. Another weekend off for our anniversary and since Tuesday this week, I am now fully committed.

So I have been doing it on and off for about 6 weeks, and have been doing veggie for about 6 weeks prior to that. Life is hard sometimes, but i have learned very lately that you just have to persevere and get on with it cos no matter what happens, you have to make time for yourself and appreciate yourself no matter what goes on around you and no matter how hard it is.

There are a few things I left out as it needed summarising but, i may share a few tidbits in the future. But for now, that is my story so far. More will follow as I am far from done telling it yet...

A bit late to 2020, but here is my first post since giving my account a small makeover. Lots of things have changed recently and I may cover it in a future post, but ny first change is my journey into veganism - bear with me before you leave!

After reading up, watching various videos and doing some soul searching, this is a positive change for me and I am hoping to start making regular posts here updating anyone that wants to read this tumblr, and for me to track my own progress. I need to lose a serious amount of weight and it all starts here and now.

SW - 273lbs (at start of 2020)

CW - 248lbs

GW - 147lbs without working out, 175lbs if i manage to get active enough and pack on some muscle (never say never)

And as always, late to the game.... hahaha.

I am hoping there are still people using this site as since it has totally blown the adult content off here (rather than moderating it and getting rid of the bots that are blatant, it just gets rid of EVERYTHING.... even I have had to review some previous posts which do not actually contain anything adult orientated lol) a lot of people seem to have abandoned the platform.

I am going to try and continue using this site though as I like the layout and I think the content is generally pretty good. Plus, I like the fact that all my posts and everyone else’s remain in chronological order (up yours INSTAGRAM!!!)

As usual - new year, new me and all that bollocks... wife is on board this time so we should start seeing some better results in the coming weeks. Until then, my posts will be just as and when, as usual, but until then, here is a picture of a kitten....

After taking some strong anti-biotics, to counteract an infection I got after one of my cats bit me (she is a house cat, she escaped and freaked the fuck out when we tried to bring her home - long story...) I have been having some digestive issues.....

***WARNING*** - DIGESTIVE RELATED CONTENT BELOW - DO NOT READ IF SQUEEMISH!

Basically, I have not had a single solid bowel movement since I started taking them. So after reading about probiotics, which I thought would just help the issue, it seems like you also need prebiotics to give them something to actually use in order to grow and multiply. 

I have been reading up on gut health for the last few months or so and am interested in knowing as much about it as possible as I truly believe (a GUT feeling if you will... great pun also!) that the gut microbiome is the key to health and longevity and the better we make it, the better we feel.

Take artificial sweeteners as an example - because they are not natural, your gut cannot absorb them and so they try their best to but, from what I read and a vague memory I can recall, it throws your gut balance right off and can cause overgrowth of bad bacteria. If that is an inaccurate description, please someone fills in the blanks for me, but as far as I can recall, that is basically what happens. And then, as you know, when you gut is out of whack, so is your whole body and you become more susceptible to falling ill. Colloidal silver and fasting are 2 of the best methods to help out in killing off the bad bacteria, combined with a diet low in processed foods is a big help in balancing it all out. 

So as far as low carbing goes for the moment, I am not doing so - brown bread, sweet potatoes, oats and beans are some of my main staples for the next week or so while I build everything back up, then I will take my own advice and get back to low carbing...

***END OF DIGESTIVE LINE *** - ITS SAFE TO LOOK NOW...

Hi all. By now, you know what I am like so I am going to do this quickly -

Sorry for lack of posts

I’ll be around more often

Falling off the wagon is a hobby again

Back to being healthy

Pretty standard stuff for me right there lol. Like I said though, I will NEVER stop trying to complete my mission and that is simply lose weight. I am obviously just taking the scenic route...

Back to IF for the moment and then gradually working my way towards Keto again. I am hoping the IF will calm my eating patterns and hormones down so I will not feel hungry all the time and so I will just be able to stick with it better. 

In the meantime, here is a funny gif....

Telling someone you are going sugar free -

Telling someone you eating high fat diet - 

Telling someone you are on low carb eating pattern -

If I am anything, it is definitely a SLOW learner lol. Anyone who has been following me for a while will know what I mean by that as my weight loss journey is both far from the typical “OMG I lost 70lbs in six minutes with this NEW DIET PILL!!!!” and also follows the whole “I am being good now, so no more cake.... ah, cake, fuck it, diet starts tomorrow....” and “The diet starts tomorrow...” and “OMG - I have been doing this for 3 weeks now and I feel amazing! I will reward myself with a cookie.... and another.... etc... (and the vicious cycle continues... again!)”

Despite all that, I am determined not to be put off by all the shit that’s constantly goes on around me and I will conquer this disease that I have. As, according to a documentary on Netflix called “Addicted to Food” - obesity is a disease and you can cure yourself with a 12 step program. Now personally, that is not really for me. And I do not think of obesity as a disease but a product of environment, simple over indulgence, or as I think of it - addiction to food. While I admit that I have addictions to certain foods (namely all the ones I can’t stop eating lol) I do not want to commit to a 12 step program as I think that is the wrong approach. (Yeah, cos all my others are SO much better haha!)

For me, it’s all about the lack of self control. This is certainly not helped by sugar being proved to be just as addictive, or more, than cocaine - but also in the fact that is in absolutely everything around us. You can’t move down a single aisle in the supermarket without bumping into a product that has sugar in it - well, apart from the fresh produce one, obvs... - but everything else - SUGAR!

It’s just getting to a point where it’s not even funny anymore. I am determined to go sugar free and commit to it for life - but I just need to break my cocaine like addiction first, which is proving to be a real pain in the ass. I know I keep banging on about it, but there are so many changes in my life I WANT to make, but it is just hard. Well, I know it will be worth it in the end, as nothing worth having ever comes easy. I have a few goals I want to achieve in the next year or so -

Lose weight

Get fitter

Eat less/no meat

Be more environmentally friendly

Break addictions to unhealthy foods - completely!

Maintain for life and NEVER get back into the cycle again...

Pretty standard stuff for me right there I reckon. As far as eating less meat goes, I am going to start by having 1 meat free day a week and take it from there. This also helps towards being environmentally friendly as the meat industry is really bad for the environment (but that is a whole other topic for another day...) so that is really doing my part. I may attempt to go dairy free also, but I will see how I get on with just the meat first.

It all starts today though, and I hope not to stray from it this time. It’s my birthday soon, so I want to not go OTT food wise and I have told my wife that I do not want a cake or a sugar laden meal. Maybe a steak or something else instead. Next year, it will be a tofu steak lol. But seriously, I have a few methods to try to counteract these cravings. Mainly, I will be using the count to 10 and breathe deep method and see how it goes from there.

Boy, but when it comes, you are all like “Where the FUCK you been?! I been waiting and waiting and waiting.... eesh!”

That moment can take your breath away. That moment when you look into your soul and finally realise that everything you think you know is still right, you were never wrong, but your mind has a habit of tricking you into thinking that you are. That moment when you want to slap yourself for not realising it sooner and you feel like you have wasted so much time over all the wrong things....

Maybe it's not like that for everyone, but it was like that for me.... certainly.

Small changes have been creeping into my life over the last 3 weeks or so, and the first major change was simply getting up earlier. So I would normally get up in the mornings between 10am and 11am, and then end up going to bed anywhere between 1am and 3am. I have been waking up for my first week at 9am at the start of the week and by the weekend it was 8am. The next week was getting up at 7.30am at the start and by the weekend, 7am. Now this week is my early week at work, and get up at 6am. This is my time to wake up from now on.

I have been going to bed around 9-10pm but I am hoping to make it a little later as my circadian rhythm starts to settle down a bit more and once I up my energy levels a little, I should have a higher quality of sleep.

I have also stopped smoking weed. I managed to get a lot off someone I know who gace it me for free (aren't friends awesome? haha) but since partaking multiple times daily for a number of weeks, I concluded it was not doing anything good for me - it was at this point where I realised that I needed to change something in my life. A combination of that, plus a conversation with a work colleague has really spurred me on - he is awesome and I hope he never leaves! Love you man! - so a few things all slowly came together.

I have also started trying to be more productive with the extra time I now have in the mornings by doing housework and looking after myself a little more - things like morning showers, catching up on washing up, emptying the dryer and folding it all - without the wife having to ask me to do them - she is happier and so am I. We are also decluttering the house and getting stuff sold on ebay and its a great feeling to clear out the cobwebs and start feeling like you are doing something more with life instead of just going to work, coming home and doing nothing inbetween.

Next week is the start of my morning workouts and meal prepping. I am not in work for the next couple of weeks so it is a good time to start building some good, life changing habits. There is more stuff to update on here, but I will come back to that in another post as I feel I have already written way too much for people to keep reading and still be alert at the end of it... even that outro was long winded lol.

And failing is not a word I use lightly. I do keep failing - failing to stick to my guns and failing to try and better myself through the power of self determination, trying to overcome self doubt and just trying to be the perfect model healthy eater - but I know that nobody is perfect - I am far from it - but still, I like to think that if I at least keep trying to succeed, I will eventually.

I just think this road is not the straight and narrow that everyone tells me it will be.... it’s full of bumps and sharp bends that keep pushing me off the side and into the valley below. But I keep trekking back up it. This road is long and arduous, but I will prevail in the end.

SW - 282lbs CW - 264lbs GW - 147lbs

Total lost - 18lbs Total to go - 117lbs

Gotta say, BIG pat on the back for me and a “Well done!”to myself so far for this amazing effort. And I can say that with confidence because it is a great effort so far. It’s comforting to know that I am doing something right - even though I keep thinking about macros and “should I eat this?” or “can I eat that?” and I am STILL losing weight for now.

I realise in the early stages it can be like this for a lot of people and then in a few weeks/months comes the dreaded “plateau” and no weight gets lost for a while. I had that when I did slim fast MANY years ago - 8 weeks and no weight loss then it just started coming off again. Although it felt like I lost nothing at first, you definitely feel *something* changing in your body - the composition of it for example - love handles started to go, my stomach went a bit flatter.... things like that. No weight loss, but you still feel good somehow.

I really hope I can get under 200lbs before the end of the year as that would be amazeballs. There are 26 weeks left until the end of the year - so that works out at around 2.5lbs per week - which should be doable. 

Only thing I know for sure is that once all this weight comes off - it is NEVER EVER EVER going back on. That is something I will guarantee myself for the rest of my natural life. 35 years of gluttony and greediness is coming to an end - slimmer, fitter and healthier me on the way. This is the year for me to do this. I am 5 months late in starting, but I mean that the timeframe of 1 year is going to be mine to conquer. I have to average 2.5lbs per week to get to my goal weight. Lets see how it goes and just take it from there......

I hate it when work spills over into my personal time and it has done it so much these last 9 days that I am just getting sick of being here now. Because I was out so late (and had stuff to do when I got home) it meant I had no time to cook so we ordered in. The way I look at it though, 80/20 rule heavily applies - especially if you have spent a lot of that time living mostly within the 80% (which I have)

I still feel it knocks me off my game a little and I feel like shit for eating it, but sometimes, needs must.