Semi-Benevolent Bone Faerie

imagine u meet louis de pointe du lac at the club and u offer him a sip of ur white monster and he says No thanks I already have one of those

long distance friends pets feel like celebrities because you can only be parasocial with them

you dont truly know how their fur pets. you will never know them like that

furthermore they have no clue you even exist

Les mis fandom @ Victor Hugo ever June 5th

General Lamarque has been dead for 194 slutty, slutty years

citizens I checked the weather app and apparently there's one more day before the storm

“what are you gonna do, cry about it?” yes . the fuck

you can be peeling a boiled egg and think to yourself wow. that was so simple. and then you peel another one and it’s like being in the throes of war. shell everywhere. egg mangled. tears in your eyes. that’s how god keeps you humble

cats will be like please i need you to watch me wiggle around on this carpet please hey look look please look at me i’m wiggling