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just thought i should let yall know im okay<3 just been focuing on some stuff...and ive lost 55lbs since may so far! ....i mean im in a hard plateau and ive been in it for about a month...but HEY! Ive started losing again, so im gonna be back on my game! Got some trips to go on, going on a trip to canada to go meet my two online bffs, got a new boyfriend to go see (long story), and i have my birthday to worry about! I’ll probably not be active still, i just wanted yall to know im alright<33333

okay so my dizziness is actually getting worse as im typing so thats all for tonight. love you guys, stay safe, and dont give up on yourself<3

🤸🏽‍♀️

a few days ago i told myself i was gonna start starving hardcore again, and ive already dropped 5.6lbs within the past 4 days. yesterday all i had was 73 calories, and today all ive had is 14 calories. i was already eating less than 700 calories before, so today ive been really out of it and my stomach has been going NUTS for the past 5 hours. ive been debating making something to eat (maybe tacos since i have a lot of the stuff to make it, every ingredient being either low fat or 100 calories or less.) but all ive been doing for the past hour is crying about how the tacos (id make two of them, 300 calories each) would make me gain all the weight i lost back. whenever i think of eating them i just cant help but start feeling sick. but im really close to binging, and if i let myself eat now maybe i can stop myself from eating 2000+ calories instead. but what if i just hold out until tomorrow and DONT binge? that would mean i would have ate 600 calories for no reason. and what if i get a taste of the tacos and THEN BINGE??? i should just go to bed, i have therapy tomorrow. but im STARVING. BUT THATS THE POINT??? UGH JOFDGHIBFHKDSAFB EDIT: i didnt eat anything at all and forced myself to go to sleep and i woke up a pound lighter :)

i just had a BIG relapse last week, and all my ed thoughts came with it lmao so i was craving ice cream (i have an almond milk one in my freezer but i feel guily eating it) so instead i got two bananas, drizzled them in a bit of chocolate sundae sauce, and stuck em in the freezer for like 2-3 hours. i plan on eating them in quarters so i can trick myself into thinking im eating a fuckton. It tastes even better than ice cream tbh and i think i might be obsessed

now i dont know how to feel about my ugw of 97lbs oof

we promised we’d stay friends. we’d promised to never ghost each other. i was worried about him. now i feel like killing myself even though i broke up with him. why am i so hurt when i have someone 10x better; he cares about me, he has a good job, he’s gorgeous...so why do i still care so much? honestly i might have to leak his nudes because what the hell i dont like being double crossed and lied to. 

only 4 tags because fuck me am i right

no tags because this is tmi

...also im letting myself rewatch all of Minx’s content and im simping HARD

thats all im doing for now, so far ive been following these rules for 3 days. the only thing i havent done is my weigh in for the night. 

ive been watching twitch streamers for a long ass time, but it was only last night i found out that JustAMinx used to be 240lbs. that’s literally my starting weight. ever since i found out, it’s all thats been on my mind. I’m gonna become a sexy streamer just like her. 

i just get the sudden urge to starve for longer. to push myself more. to punish myself for doing “wrong”. to jump off the tallest building i can get to the top of. 

tried to recover and ending up back on my BED shit. I can’t even make myself throw up. It took me feeling a hunger pain to realize how much i’ve fucked up...how much progress i lost. Im ashamed to even go outside. i plan on just starting over with my weight loss, beginning with a 24 hour long fast. after that...i dunno what ill do.