TE Dewitt

My writer is still working hard on the fic that goes with this for the @strangerthingsreversebigbang so think of this as a teaser for when @tedewitt manages to get across the finish line ! I know you can do it lovely!

The crew shows up totally unsure of what to expect, charmed but surprised when it's Ilya opening the door in a tank and sweats and dramatically sighing, "Is meal prep day."

They spend hours filming the couple navigating the kitchen, arguing over how much salt to put in their egg cups, talking about how they learned to cook together when they first made a real go of their relationship.

Shane keeps his hands busy and his eyes focused on his prep work, and that makes it easier to talk about the murky grey area between healthy food choices and disordered eating. Ilya just rubs his back and mocks how he's dicing the bell peppers and keeps calling what he's wearing his "unlucky sweatpants" until Shane hits him in the face with a spatula while mumbling something about tuna melts.

Surprising exactly no one, the video goes viral when it drops on YouTube. It explodes on socials, with thousands of people stitching together Ilya saying "is meal prep day" with videos of their own meal prep, their healthy habits, sharing their own journey to loving food and treating it as fuel and not punishment. They use the tag #eatlikehollanov and it trends immediately.

Ilya's favorite part is when fans start to battle over #eatlikehollanov - the food posts get overtaken with videos and photos of them out at social events, serving cunt and generally looking like top designers battle it out for who gets repped by The Gay Wonder Twins of Hockey (which they do, and stop calling us that, we're married you perverts).

Then Shane and Ilya are spotted at a bar making out in a dark corner and everyone remembers these two probably spend 30% of their waking hours eating each other alive, and suddenly it's #eatlikehollanov munch munch munch yum yum yum.

The Centaurs jump on the trend, sharing their own food prep videos with increasing innuendo. Luca Haas turning bright red while eating a glazed donut gets 3 million views, but Troy really breaks the internet by eating a banana while maintaining eye contact with the camera the whole time. Harris threatens to replace the Kiss Cam at games with #eatlikehollanov and Shane tries his hardest to crawl into a corner and die because he just wanted to share how he protein loads, you guys, why did you have to make it so weird.

and shane is very “carry me to bed and im passenger princess ipad baby” husband and he’s also “im going to fix things around the house with my bare hands and chop wood manly style” husband

Ilya: that's not true! I did! In the shower!

Shane: I introduced myself to you at world juniors!

Ilya: that wasn't a move! That was normal introduction!

Shane: Ilya, baby, when have you ever known me to initiate a social interaction with a stranger?

It's the one where Eddie, alive but heavily injured, is hiding out in the radio station spending his time arguing with her over whose the better DJ.

(It's him, obviously.)

Alongside Robin, he grows close to Will, until the younger Byers finally works up the nerve to admit his very-not-straight crush on an unnamed someone. Eddie, who sympathizes immediately, rests a hand on Will’s shoulder, gives it a gentle squeeze, and says:

"It's alright Byers. We've all been there. Pity Harrington's the straightest man alive, right?"

Robin, in a knee-jerk, instinctive reaction, frowns and loudly protests; "Steve's not straight."

Eddie stares at her.

"What?"

"You've seen how much hair spray he goes through in a month, how on earth did you think he was straight?"

“Uh,” Will says, confused and unfortunately caught somewhere in the middle. “It’s not—my crush isn’t… um. It’s not Steve?”

"You can't call someone a queer just because they like hairspray, Starbuck."

"You can when it's Steve. Seriously how do you not see it?"

This argument will go on for twenty minutes, in which Robin will defend Steve's alleged queerness with her life while Eddie pokes hole after hole in it, until the man himself walks into the room and Will Byers, with the level of bravery people keep forgetting he possesses, looks him dead in the eye and asks;

"Robin says you're queer too. Are you?"

And Steve will wheel on his platonic super bestie in full offense, not because she outed him, but because; "What the fuck Robin, you said I wasn't that queer like, two days ago!"

"Different circumstance." She says immediately.

"Different--," Steve sputters, "You said that sweater was way too gay for me!"

"Because it was!"

1. Steve Harrington is smart

2. Steve Harrington is hung™

tukru's november fic recs!

at this point no one is surprised we're already half way through the next month when i post my monthly fic recs.

✂️ ✂️ 15 STRANGER THINGS FANFIC RECOMMENDATIONS UNDER THE CUT (mostly steddie but also some mungrove and byler) ✂️ ✂️