why am I still on this app

Let's all run outside and start yelling and screaming and see if we can get people to panic. If everyone did this it would make a big difference

oh, no, you misunderstand me. those were my monkeys. yeah the circus and i have since parted ways. yeah it was the elephant thing, i dont really want to address that right now though

fill your body with cranberries so the horse that kills you gets a sensual surprise when he begins to feed

i will give the  horse that kills me no such luxury

interesting dates on this post

those aren’t dates, they are explicitly stated to be cranberries

never kill yourself . your next apple could be so good it makes you feel like a horse

The science behind THC + alcohol as a combination is literally soo interesting because it basically causes the crimson red duckling in your body to confront the serpent in the bronze vessel of your heart. Basically you feel good because the duckling is able to eat the harmonious seeds stored within the vessel and transfer these positive energies into your body. You can have bad highs when this happens if the duckling awakens the serpent and it bites the duckling. The interesting part is when you ingest alcohol after THC because it floods the vessel and causes the serpent to fall into a deep sleep. The duckling never gets attacked by the serpent when this happens because it is unconscious and the duckling is actually able to get fat from the harmonious seed, which causes an enjoyable sensation.

I wish depression were an emergency. I wish someone could take one look at how sick I am and go “oh my god, we need to get you to a hospital!” and then when we get there I get rushed into surgery and the surgeons say “it’s a good thing you brought her here when you did, this is a seriously advanced case” and then they put me under and spend the next ten hours pulling metres of long, sticky black strands of gunk out of my body, throwing it immediately into an incinerator so that it can’t infect anyone else. And then they could stitch me back up and I could rest a few days, and when I leave the hospital everyone can see how much better I am and they congratulate me saying “well done, you’ve been so brave, I’m so glad you’re ok. I love you.”

*voice of someone craving even the tiniest sliver of control* i could make a spreadsheet,

😳 <- this emoji but without the blush or romantic connotation. im not blushing im staring you directly in your fucking eyes

can we hit 150k before this piece of shits one year anniversary

let us also not forget the meekest of them all: ._.

as well as the pensive v_v

i love scrolling my own blog narcissus at the pond style it’s so fun

it’s so weird how chronic digestive illnesses are seen as funny poop problems when they constantly make me wish i was dead and suck the joy and motivation out of my life

absolutely the worst part of the male helplessness fetishism is that men know about it and will weaponize it against you. they will fuck up and do stupid shit and pretend not to know how to clean a mirror or find grapes at the grocery store and then simper and giggle expecting you to think its adorable. and then they will get REALLY angry when you do not

my OCs are sooo cool you guys don't know what you're missing. if you could see the show i'm watching in my head rn you'd go so crazy i'm telling u

I’m at the BDSM club painting tunnels on the wall for my sub to run into

Who the fuck is that

i believe it to be a stranger things character my liege

Mmm… most disconcerting. Gramercy, knight, you are dismissed… as for the interloper with the “strange things” remark… may they be thrown to the rats in the dungeon… *bangs scepter on tile floor and it echoes throughout my decadent throne room*