peachy

(lovingly) nothing you say makes any sense ❤️

baby i can be ur problematic bi wife

all the milfs at the farmers market are fighting tooth and nail to be first in line to run their fingers through my hair

*doing a tarot card reading* uh oh… this guy has a sword… better watch out for that…

my only two moods ever are tenderness and hysteria

how does wine DO what it DOES. I feel sexy. I feel relaxed. I wanna take off my pants and kiss.

its the Grape

It's Dionysus

my malewife could beat your malewife btw

My penis curving Left… Cuz you didn’t treat me Right….

“i could fix him” “i could make him worse” well I could make him bisexual

the fact that i am constantly saying strange and unpleasant things is just part of my charm

she wears short skirts i have feelers she’s cheer captain and i am a creature

Shoutout to girls who are off the rails. Girls who are insane. Girls who have just completely lost the fucking plot

me @ the stars: help me

stop asking me wyd i’m literally always thinking about love and how it touches every aspect of the human experience

if she’s ur girl why is she attaching a radio collar to me to see how i migrate and behave