#whiners

I've already answered this question a million times, but since it's been a while, I'll humor you.

But first: I support anything in fiction.

If you had a better grasp of what fiction is, you'd get that.

Types like you cry with your emojis because you're incapable of articulating why you have such a fuckass time separating fictional characters in fictional settings from real people and real situations. That's not entirely your fault, because you haven't been taught shit about that, and instead have been groomed into this mindset where you think authors who write sexual taboo and all of that dark sexual stuff that you don't understand are who you judge their characters to be.

I stress sexual, since none of you kids have any problems with non-sexual gore and don't constantly harass people who like to write it. You have a severe lack of understanding about human sexuality and behaviors; you don't understand fetishes, kinks, or roleplay (break down that word, now..."role"..."play"..."role", "play"..."roleplay"). And Christ, even when some of you do go to school for it, you're still fucking up by spreading falsehoods and misinformation because your Purity Code overwrites your reading comprehension (almost like y'all cherrypick your knowledge stores). It's everywhere, from TT to Reddit to IG...all over social fkn media. Chances are after you read this, you still won't understand a damn thing I've said until years down the road after you've lived life a little and read more (good, non-fiction) books.

Now, genuinely, the only other person that Wednesday Addams really wanted to hang around with in Season 1 was Donovan Galpin (you can't even say that about Eugene, who she ditched a couple of times before he was attacked). From their first meeting there was a spark of [Donovan's] enmity that Wednesday used to her advantage; she was the classic Thorn in One's Side trope, for him (and also for Xavier, on a different degree; and on the flip side, Enid was/is her thorn).

Okay just hold on a moment here, I'm interrupting this because I suddenly got a wave of hatred for Season 2 because of its ridiculous time jump. All of those thorny issues between the roommates should've been hashed out in the second semester of Wednesday's Sophomore Year, but they all act like the time jump didn't exist and that a whole ass semester from January 2023 to June 2023 just passed magically with no issues or absences until the Summer of 2023 when Wednesday went after Chet. I fucking despise the time jump. It's insulting to everyone's intelligence, but the lot of y'all fuckwits aren't intelligent enough to comprehend that. This is just one of the bigger reasons I'll never consider the bulk of W2 as canon for my work, aside from doing some of my own cherrypicking and writing Agnes into the mattress. Decent canon transforming into fuckall canon ticks me off, just as it ticks anyone else off; treating the audience like they're super stupid ticks me off. I think that's why AB8 is taking sooooo fucking long...I've got decent canon and I don't want its topper to look or smell like W2's first half or ST5's 2nd half.

Watch Season 1 again and watch each of Wednesday and Donovan's interactions. Watch the way Ortega plays McShane in each scene. The girl who loves fucking with, and often clashing with, female authority figures (Morticia, Weems, Thornhill, Kinbott, Arlene) seems to know that being soft/er with the male authority figures (Gomez, Donovan) tends to get her what she wants. That's all part of the trope...for as abrasive and caustic as she can be, she's still got charm that she knows she can use to her advantage with them.

And this is just verifiable canon, never mind whatever fanon I've come up with on AB Wednesday's part (Daddy Issues, hypersexuality, drug use...eugh God, she's actually Ortega, isn't she 😒 ETA: WAIT, I GAVE HER ZEUS JUICE TOO).

As for Donovan, I don't think I talk much about him when explaining AB because he's pretty straightforward canon. I didn't add anything to his core characteristics: He's a worn down, alcoholic cop who's been stuck between a rock and a hard place for years and years with his experience with Francie in the past and Tyler in the present. He wasn't even looking at Wednesday as anything but a thorn in his side from the get-go, because the more people he had snooping around the case, the less likely he could keep Tyler "safe". 😑 I mean, I wrote him as that trope of a guy who likes fishing/hunting and has a secret cabin by a lake, and that's canon now too. Seems like Millar & Gough and I draw from the same well of clichés. 😑

But, he's not who you would judge him to be; he hasn't looked at a young Nevermore student like that since Francie, and a part of himself does hate himself for it (this really does show up in 8) because he doesn't know what to do when Wednesday is persistent. You'd say, "He's gotta do the right thing and say no, otherwise he's not a good person/not normal!" But you forget two things:

1) He isn't real. None of these people are real. Yes, real people portray characters on a real screen to make it all come alive, but it's still not real, and even takes place in a world where physics doesn't behave like it does in reality, and where people fucking turn into mythical and folkloric creatures via the use of CGI.

2) Given all of that, the power dynamics aren't the same in this fictional universe. ABWednesday not only has supernatural powers that she doesn't understand yet, Donovan is even farther away from understanding anything about her powers and is just a tiny bit scared of what she's capable of (especially knowing that she's the type who puts piranhas in a pool full of boys when a couple of them have pissed her off). Could he have firmly rejected ABW's persistence without unfathomable consequences? Would love to see you try to tell me that he could have, since I know what ABW is capable of.

Because once again...she isn't real. She's an object, a paper doll —

ABW: *SLAMS open the door* No one except Donovan calls me a doll.

ABD: *leans, whispering* Uh, that's "Doll".

ABW: *stares at him*

ABD: I don't call you a doll, I call you "Doll". It's different.

ABW: It's practically the same thing.

ABD: Not really. One's an object, the other's like a pet name —

ABW: A pet name.

ABD: *sighs* You know exactly what I mean. And you should know the diff between "a doll" and "Doll". You're the writer, aintcha —

ABW: Are you calling me dumb?

ABD: *squints* Excuse me, what hun?

DirecTor: *sneaking out the window*

ABW: GET BACK HERE *directs a fat bolt of ⚡ at my ass*

DirecTor: *yelps, tumbling out of the window and landing in the bushes with a thump as they both rush to the window*

ABD: Why'd you go and do that for?!

ABW: I thought he'd just fall back into the office.

*leans out to see me unmoving in the bushes, almost clipping the brim of Donovan's hat while closing the window* He'll be fine.

*steals the hat and puts it on* Wanna fuck on his desk?

ABD: *sighs, staring down his nose at her*

As the Marxist agitator Adam Smith once said, “People of the same trade seldom meet together, even for merriment and diversion, but the conversation ends in a conspiracy against the public, or in some contrivance to raise prices.”

Smith understood that capitalists hate capitalism. They don’t want to compete with one another, because that would interfere with their ability to raise the prices their customers pay and reduce the wages they pay their workers. Thus Peter Thiel’s anticapitalist rallying cry, “competition is for losers,” or Warren Buffett’s extreme horniness for businesses with “wide, sustainable moats.”

These anti-capitalist capitalists love big government. They love no-bid military contracts, they love ACA subsidies for health insurance companies, they love Farm Bill cash for Cargill and Monsanto. What they don’t love is markets.