#type three

To the Over-Achiever,

           Driven and accomplish-laden, your ambition to rise to the top is unparalleled, but do not forget that your body deserves breaks, too. Afraid of failure and feedback resistant, you wade through the waters of professionalism until you arrive safely to the other side. You carry whatever stragglers you find with you along the way.

           You are not worthless. You can never be worthless—not only because of your distinctive intrinsic worth, but also, because I see that you are working so hard not to be. I see how you would never let yourself fall into that subdivision. I see you.

           Dedicated to your goals and task-oriented, you want so much to continually improve, and my darling, do you continually improve. I know because I’ve watched you grow—shape—change forms and metamorphosis in to the you that you are today.

           But I know that you struggle. I know you focus too much on success and not enough on accepting your failures, but my god, you are human.

           And you are going to fail.

           I know you don’t want to hear that, but I’ve advice, still. Next time, fail more spectacularly. Fail better. I challenge you to fail again. Can you manage that accomplishment, sweet love? And if you can, I’ll be so proud. But if you can’t—just give it time. For, I know, when given time, you will eventually achieve all the chores that have been laid out before you.

           Because you are self-aware, I believe that you understand that your value does not lie in what and how much you can accomplish in any given timeframe, but I know, too, that you so very often refuse to let your soul rest. But you have to let yourself rest; the child within you deserves to finally be able to rest.

           Remember that you are one person, and that you do not have to accomplish the to-do list of an entire office every single time you bring yourself to work. You are not required to run every errand and do every chore—not on your own, and especially not within the mere moments you are holding yourself so rigidly to.

           Stop trying to impress other people. Focus on yourself and who you are. Let your accolades fall away from you, and allow yourself to feel worthy without them—without the self-imposed allegation that others will expect more from you than you can give to them. You are enough.

With every conviction I can muster,

r.h.

P.S. There is no wrong decision. Any decision that you make will be the right one because you have made it.

Song: Three by Sleeping at Last

From The Owl House by Dana Terrace/Disney

Type: 3w4 Subtype: sp/so Tritype: 316 Enneagram Analysis Masterlist

Enneagram Moodboards

Type 3: The Achiever (The Performer)

Type One, the Reformer: ”For truth was to me

A breath, a wind,

A shadow, a phantom,

And never had I touched

The hem of its garment.” --Stephen Crane, “’Truth’, said a traveler”

Type 1 — As a crew member, they’re the first to finish their tasks and will get upset if they’re interrupted by an emergency meeting. Will avoid voting anyone without reason. As an imposter, they only kill when they’re 100% certain no one will see them; mainly stay quiet in chat and avoid outright lying, but will point out when others are “acting sus.” Won’t support theories that say their fellow imposter should be voted off and may skip to avoid throwing them under the bus.

Type 2 — As a crew member, they pick someone and follow them around, both for safety in numbers and so they can vouch for them when they see them complete a visual task. They try to make sure everyone has a chance to speak in emergency meetings. As an imposter, they overthink every decision because they’re afraid they’ll get caught, so they mostly end up sabotaging. They use vents sparingly. They’re great with double kills, especially if their fellow imposter takes the initiative. They naturally end up flocking in crowds, so they avoid suspicion there.

Type 3 — As a crew member, they’re both completing their tasks as quickly as possible and watching everyone to see who’s sus. When in a meeting, they’re the first to accuse anyone and will wholeheartedly fight for them to be voted off. Probably won’t say much if they were wrong about it; they just immediately move on to try and find who the imposter actually is. As an imposter, they’re very quick. They use venting and sabotaging to their advantage and will work while walking. When in a meeting, they’ll pick someone to actively accuse and will avoid any suspicion being put on them by throwing someone else under the bus every time (including fellow imposters, if people seem to be catching on). People usually believe them.

Type 4 — As a crew member, they’re disappointed that they don’t get to be the imposter. They have a balance of watching other people, completing tasks, and running around. They may call an emergency meeting if they’re being chased or they believe they know who the imposter is, but they’re not the type to abuse the button. They’ll share their own opinions during meetings, but don’t usually actively accuse others nor demand everyone listen to them. They just want to be sure their thoughts are heard. As an imposter, they may jokingly call people sus, but won’t outright demand someone be voted off. They’ll just share that they’re going to vote for someone (with hopes that you’ll follow suit.) They enjoy having a unique role, so they may not always fake tasks; they may just run around from room to room, killing people when the mood hits and jumping into the vent to get away. They don’t take their fellow imposter into account too much; they won’t throw them under the bus, but they won’t defend them either. Very much of an independent killer.

Type 5 — As a crew member, they’re pretty quiet, usually connecting the dots right off the bat and trying to find the imposter. They don’t speak up immediately, usually waiting until they’ve acquired enough evidence to accuse someone. If they’re really sure someone is imposter, they will probably call their teammates dumb for not listening to them. They do their tasks as they pass them, but mostly focus on watching the cams and the map. As an imposter, they try to frame people as solidly as possible. Like to turn out the lights often. They rely on vent kills when two people are standing near each other, both completing a task so they can’t see the room around them; whichever one didn’t die looks sus af. They will point that out during an emergency meeting as well. Won’t try to defend their fellow imposter, but won’t try to accuse them either. If fellow imposter looks suspicious, they’ll play that to their advantage to get eyes off themselves.

Type 6 — As a crew member, they find inconsistencies with people’s stories during meetings and point them out. They’re highly suspicious of everyone, so they actively look for people to trust rather than the imposter specifically. They look for opportunities to watch someone complete a visual task and immediately let everyone know “[insert color here] is safe.” They also point out when someone would’ve had the perfect opportunity to kill them, but didn’t, “so they must be crew.” Of course, they complete their tasks diligently as well. As an imposter, they try to form a band of people who trust them by using the same aforementioned tactics, letting people know who’s safe. Being protected by them makes people want to protect them in return, so they’ll be actively defended for most of the game. When it’s down to the last few people, they’ll throw their defenders under the bus and act betrayed, “I don’t want to believe it, but it has to be [this color.] That was just way too sus. Dang, I really trusted you.” Their killing method is to off their allies and frame people who suspected them. They use sabotaging to their advantage, but not overly so. They don’t vent too often; it doesn’t make for good alibies.

Type 7 — As a crew member, they switch between running around aimlessly, actually completing tasks, and just watching other people. If they get bored and no one’s died yet, they may hit the panic button just to tell the imposters to “make something happen.” They may have some fun with chat during emergency meetings; calling people sus for no reason, asking how everyone’s doing, etc. Don’t like to actively accuse anyone, but if someone convinces them, they’ll be like “Ohhhh tru. Guys, vote [this color.]” 5s and 6s may easily take advantage of the trusting 7. As an imposter, they try to do a good job with framing people, shifting blame, and killing properly, but if the game’s going too slow or there aren’t enough opportunities to kill, then they may pull off some riskier moves. That is, killing someone right in front of someone else, then reporting the body and saying that person did it, or jumping into a big cluster of people (like at cams) and killing one so they know it has to be someone in that cluster, but who? Everyone definitely forgets who was in that group, so suspicion is eventually shaken. They just like interesting games. Regardless of role, they may go to lights and flick off the switches as people try to fix them.

Type 8 — As a crew member, they may occasionally forget to actually do their tasks, instead running around trying to find anyone who’s acting sus. Will absolutely call an emergency meeting if someone seems to be following someone else or is standing still when a sabotage happens. Will accuse that person actively until they’re voted off. They just wanna keep their crew safe; if they don’t believe you’re a crew member, you’re screwed. As an imposter, they can be kinda reckless. They actively sabotage and run around killing as many people as possible. The game maybe over by the time you realize anyone even died; they’re quick, especially if they have a fellow imposter they feel can rely on. They will not throw them under the bus as long as they can help it. They’d pair well with Type 2s, as they’re the type to take the initiative for a double kill and they give Type 2 the opportunity to kill while they’re sabotaging. Very attentive to what their fellow imposter is doing.

The view from Holy Hope/Holy Law¹ is that there are no exceptions to the way things work -- the same forces apply to everyone and everything all the time, which is something you can continuously count on. The distortion of this for type 3 becomes the discovery that there's no real such thing as cheating reality, only different ways of taking advantage of the reality that's already unfolding, and then positioning yourself within it.

This leads to over-identifying with the things you've done as a way to identify with anything at all. If there's no such thing as cheating reality, and you made this thing happen all on your own, that means you are objectively the best unless someone can do it better. In a paradoxical sense, it's recognizing that the rules are the same for everyone, but those same rules built you different/made you better: it's nothing personal, you're just the best.

This is also why the burnout is so diffuse at 9 if this feeling gets snatched, because there's really no one to blame -- other people were just playing the game like you.