#terminator2

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Spoiler Warning: Pluribus Episodes 1–3

This rant discusses major plot elements from Pluribus. Proceed only if you’re caught up.

You have been warned. ⚠️

You ever notice how slow-burn streaming shows make everybody look dumb? 🤦‍♂️

It’s like the moment a writer gets an eight-episode order, every character suddenly loses the ability to connect two dots. Pluribus is Exhibit A. Carol’s wandering around for three whole episodes like, “Gee, why does the hive mind keep doing everything I say?”

Meanwhile the audience figured it out 25 minutes into episode one. 🧠💡

Air Force One drops out of the sky in episode two — on request — and she’s still in episode three going, “Weird… wonder what’s going on?”

Lady, WE know what’s going on. YOU should know. The neighbors’ cat should know at this point.

And then she walks into that grocery store like she’s expecting a clue from the universe. Shelves refill instantly, and she stares at it like it’s the opening of 2001: A Grocery Odyssey. 🛒✨

She’s analyzing bananas like they hold the secrets of the cosmos.

Meanwhile, the audience is at home screaming,

“IT’S A HIVE MIND! IT OBEYS YOU! MOVE ON!”

And then — THEN — she asks about a nuclear bomb.

A nuclear bomb. 💣😳

Like the restocking lesson taught her nothing. It’s like the story paused so long she forgot the last point entirely.

Compare that to Terminator 2.

John Connor tests the robot — “Stand on one foot” — and in ten seconds, boom, situation understood. Sarah Connor? Traumatised, hunted, locked in a psych ward — and even SHE figures out the usefulness of the machine faster than a streaming protagonist with perfect eyesight and all the clues glowing in neon. 🔥🤖

Because movies respect your time.

Streaming respects your subscription. 🐌💸

Slow-burn sci-fi has become this endless molasses drip where the audience is sprinting ahead and the protagonist is crawling behind like their consciousness is running on dial-up.

It’s not “character depth.”

It’s not “emotional realism.”

It’s episode padding with dramatic lighting.

Half these characters don’t feel human anymore.

It's T-1000 from Terminator 2, bottle feeding a baby kitty! ♥ I'm thinking while looking for Conner, he found a baby kitty crying. T-1000 gains info from touch, so when he picked up the kitten from curiosity, he was immediately fascinated with the soft ball of squish. He took care of baby, but once he obtained a new lead on Conner, he quickly handed kitty off to a real officer and continued his assignment.

I saw some deleted T2 scenes. T800 gets the majority of his info from sight, in his internal monitor. But for T1000, he can look for info by carefully running his fingers over objects (like he did in Connor's room). Touching a kitty would be very interesting and distracting, I assume. Maybe cats are a very rare sight in the post-apocalyptic world, so he had no data on domestic felines. Dogs don't like robots/cyborgs/androids--but maybe cats don't mind as long as they are provided food. XD

While feeding the baby, he is mesmerized when he discovers the thing vibrates. It's an entirely new tactile sensation!

*baby kitty licks his finger*