#singleparentproblems

I'll always be the first to admit I'm horribly out of shape, could stand to lose a few pounds for the sake of my screaming joints on a morning and not the most motivated to eat properly. But the starting of this damn cold was kind of running me down this morning so figured now is as good a time as any to get the ball rolling, get a smidge of adrenaline going, blast out a few of the bleh sinusy cobwebs, increase the endorphins, all that nonsense. The wriggly, Jackson back pack while trying to do planks was pretty tough, but hey, more resistance, less time pretending I'm not dying horrifically on the inside. The bear hug and condescending pat on the face after crunch number 6 was just too much though. When your 1 and a half year old is basically giving you an "at least you tried" hug you know it's bad... Cheers mate...

I envision this being the theme of my life for the next few years…

Is #singleparentproblems a thing yet? I could use that one.

#saturday #sick #singleparentproblems #nurture

After the cumulative effects of sleepless nights and colds and general stressing I finally got a night off on Saturday to go out for the besties birthday and recharge the batteries. Definitely feeling the benefit of some actual Me time. The Boy in bed by 6.45 after we carbed up on pizza, sitter supplied with Netflix and caffeine, out the door by 7, few drinks, couple of bands at the local venue and in the taxi home by 11 followed by a cup of tea and leftover pizza. Might not sound like the most exciting to some but it was exactly what I needed. Fantastic few hours with all my favourite people, not enough to drink that I was drunk (sociable certainly, but not enough to make a tit of myself and no chance of a hangover), back in time for Aunty Raine to get home at a reasonable time and early enough that I could appreciate Jackson sleeping through and going to work on Sunday feeling as bright and refreshed as is possible at 8am. Though there was the added bonus of a few glances my way! A small victory for the ego! No interest in any of the glancees but when you've been suffering with a big case of the negative self image it's always nice to have some positive input from outside the group, even if they are looking through beer goggle, I'll take it!

So today was a pretty stressed out kind of day. Work was busy as hell which ordinarily I can shrug off but today just... bleh. I think the heat probably had a lot to do with it. Then we were invited to the pub. A family bar of course, seemed a shame to waste the sunshine and the chance to socialise with grown ups. Ooooh boy, was that a mistake! The Boy had been out for a walk with the child minder earlier in the day and hadn't had a nap so was obviously over tired by the time we got there. Silly bugger here didn't think to bring a bottle of milk but brought a sippy cup of juice. Mistake number 1! Then thought if I took his football he'd like a play on the field as normally that's his go-to activity if we're out and about. NOPE! The door seemed way more fun so he insisted on climbing in and out (only about 8 inches off the ground but enough that he can't do it on his own so... not a great choice of activity!) I even tried taking him to the middle of the field and playing there. Nope, ran all the way back to the door so he could climb in and go try and play with the pool table. Tried putting him in the push chair for a nap... HAHA! Just. No. Then it started getting chilly so we went in side. It's where he wanted to be anyway right? WRONG! He still kept going in and out the door and playing with the security gate. So we got a lift and came home. I know it was just over tiredness but it's still... frustrating. As a single parent I don't get the chance to socialise much and yes I know, baby comes first and that's the sacrifice we make as mothers. Still... would be nice if just once things would go my way!

I honestly can't decide which I prefer this morning. The Boy has started sleeping through more often than not (pfft, only taken 17 months...) however if he sleeps through he'll wake up between 6.00-6.30am. If, on the other hand, he wakes up between 3-4 and then goes back down, he'll then stay asleep till anywhere between 7.00-8.00. It doesn't seem like much of a win but it feels more like a treat when I get to stay in bed til 8, even if that involves interrupted sleep. I mean.. 0600? On a non work day? How is that a good thing?! Sure, I feel more rested because I haven't had to get up, drag my backside downstairs, warm up a drink then sit with him for hugs while he finishes it, but it's still dark outside when we get up! General musings I had while enjoying my 0800 lie in this morning...