#processing speed

you should be allowed to take your time to do things and I am so sorry if people have ever made you feel like you can't.

you and your contributions are just as worthy as everyone else's, the speed in which you do them should not impact that.

I am so sorry if you ever been made to feel like you weren't good enough because you "couldn't keep up".

Only vote if you’ve taken an official, in person test (dodgy online ones don’t count).

SIMON: Hello? Did you hear me?

ALVIN 2.0: No. Sorry ‘bout that. Didn’t catch a word you said. My brain is currently processing 10 different things at once. It was processing 20, but I cut it down to 10 for maximum efficiency.

SIMON: Can you…maybe pause that to pay attention to our conversation?

ALVIN 2.0: No can do, bro. But don’t worry, I can just add our conversation as thing number 11. Easy peasy.

SIMON: I doubt it.

ALVIN 2.0: What did you wanna ask me?

SIMON: Do you want spaghetti tonight?

ALVIN 2.0: Sounds great.

SIMON: Do you know what I asked?

ALVIN 2.0: Yeah. You asked about pasta.

SIMON: What kind of pasta?

ALVIN 2.0: Spaghetti.

SIMON: (shocked face) Okay….

ALVIN 2.0: Would you like to hear about the 10 different things my brain is processing?

SIMON: Alvin, no. With all due respect, I don’t think I’d be able to handle that.

I learned about processing speeds recently and let me tell you I have NEVER felt more comfortable with how I am

“Processing speed is the time that lapses from when you receive information until you understand it and start to respond.”

Neurodivergent people typically have a slower processing speed than neurotypical people (due to how much information we take in and other things) which causes us to “learn” at a slower rate

But we are still intelligent and can pick up these things! I am worthy of learning and being taught!

There are many different types of processing disorders such as visual, auditory, and sensory are common!

A great article:

More information and resources below the cut!

I’ve pointed out before how every successful person I’ve ever seen talking about their ADHD is hyperactive, good at multitasking, has too much energy, finds it easy to start doing stuff and hard to stop, needs little sleep, and is male. By contrast, people with my sort of ADHD are hypoactive, good at hyperfocusing on one thing, experience brain fog and have too little energy, find it hard to start as well as stop, need endless sleep, and are female. 

(Is that why women with ADHD seem especially likely to feel guilty for being “lazy?” Hmm.).

In my self-hating mind, Hyperactive/Multitasking/Racecar ADHD is “good ADHD” and my Low Energy/Monotasking brain is “bad ADHD.” (Obviously, this is nonsense. If you also have a Low Energy/Monotasking brain, your brain isn’t bad. Only mine. Or something). 

Here’s a great example of how this difference plays out in everyday life:

ADHD Millennial:  “The best rule I’ve found when I have multiple tasks to choose from is to start with the task that is least rewarding and most difficult. In other words, explicitly identify the task that I least want to do and would be most likely to procrastinate on – then do that task first.” 

He does this because: “Generally, the ADHD brain gives the highest priority to whichever task is most interesting and rewarding. One of the problems with having ADHD is that even when you want to prioritize a different task, your brain might still automatically gravitate to the task that offers an immediate reward.”

Me: I have tried this strategy many times, and it doesn’t work. When a task is unrewarding and hard, I am unable to start. If I don’t give up and do something else, I will literally sit looking at my to do list, doing nothing but struggle with myself, for hours. I will end up getting nothing done because I chose to start with a task requiring too much activation energy. It must be amazing to be able to just decide to do something, and actually start doing it!

Also, I rarely procrastinate on tasks because they’re boring and unrewarding. Yes, that’s despite the fact that boredom feels like torture. I procrastinate because:

it makes me anxious, or 

I believe I can’t do it, or

I don’t know how to do it, or 

I feel guilty for doing it so late.

So I need to do the opposite of this guy, and start with one of my easiest, most motivating tasks -- but take precautions not to get stuck doing it for hours.

Talk about my own issues with having a low PSI, and what that might look like for other people.

I sometimes feel like it’s impossible to get the ideas in my head out into the real world, and that it takes an extra moment to understand new topics my teacher is introducing. This is because I have a low processing speed. The processing speed index or PSI is a part of an intelligence scale that ties in to IQ tests. When I took it I got ‘gifted’ scores for all of my categories except PSI. So I had a high Verbal Comprehension Index (VCI), Visual Spatial Index (VSI), Fluid Reasoning Index (FRI), and Working Memory Index (WMI). So basically my brain is functioning at a very high level. There is a catch.

My brain can’t keep up with my brain.

No seriously, my PSI is so low that I feel like my ideas are never the same out loud as they are in my head. Even this. I love to write and read but the English language doesn’t seem to have enough words for me, or at least not the right ones. Because my highest and lowest scores are so far apart (literally 50 points) the level at which I can actually function in the real world is actually much more average.

PSI has a lot to do with concentration, short term memory, and the ability to register and react to visual stimuli.

Low PSI also affects you ability to react as quickly. So in class when your teacher is having a class discussion people with low PSI scores might not interact as much because they need to take the time to process all the information. It's not that we don’t understand or don't want to participate but that our time is better spent mulling over the information then spitting out our thoughts.

Also a big gap between intelligence and processing speed can make you feel like you are not as smart as the people around you. You might tend to be a perfectionist and feel like the things to make/do/write/say will never be quite right. That unfortunately will probably never change because our languages just don’t accommodate what's going on inside our brains. Luckily this means you will do better on tests or assignments where you have time to think things over and edit over and over.

Low PSI has also affected my ADHD, making concentrating and contributing even harder. But I have found that when I do have something to say, and a way to say it, I realize I really do understand what’s going on.