#irony

Maomao every 10 min in her head: “he’s so gorgeous he could topple nations. He’s so pretty he could make the most straight men gay. He’s so charming he could waltz into any room and get whatever he wants. He’s so heckin’ beautiful he is like a rare flower people would destroy kingdoms to find.”

Notice how these ICE agents "working" at a U.S. airport are NOT wearing their masks?

I thought they were so afraid of being doxxed that they had to wear masks to protect themselves and their families?

Apparently not.

ICE agents were probably told NOT to wear masks at the airports to avoid terrorizing average Americans.

This gives credence to the hypothesis that ICE wears masks to terrorize immigrants and to avoid responsibility when they use illegal tactics to apprehend them.

ICE agents currently being fine with not wearing masks at the airports suggests that the Democrats' demand that ICE stop wearing masks when detaining immigrants is more than reasonable.

We wouldn't know this if Trump hadn't ordered ICE to work at the airports to support the currently unfunded TSA.

Oh, the irony.

DC X DP crossover

(POTENTIAL WARNINGS: graphic depictions of violence, trauma, vivisection, eating disorders, mental illness and gay shit. I think that covers everything)

Phantom Pickpocket

The usual Danny’s parents are assholes when they find out he’s Phantom. He’s the ghost prince. Not yet crowned king. So has new powers but doesn’t know how to use them. However he can’t go into the ghost zone because portal was destroyed. Can’t go to Vlad because fruitloop.

Danny flees the scene away from his friends family. Ends up in Gotham, ectoplasm, yada yada. However instead of meeting up with Batman. He stays in crime alley with a couple of the stray kids. He becomes a particularly good pick pocket with the invisibility and intangibility. He only goes after people that wouldn’t notice a lil money missing from their wallets and never takes all of it.

He stays in an abandoned building and cares for the other kids. However one day one of the girls that lowkey reminded him of Ellie got really sick. She needed antibiotics. None of them had the money or access required. So Danny was stealing more often and saving up more money. Taking watches, sunglasses and whatever he could grab his hands on really.

He was walking back to their abandon building with soup when he sees a shiny brand new red motorcycle in an alley. He figured the whole thing would go for enough to get them a place to stay for a while but it was to big and high profile. So if he got caught it would be considered GTA and a felony. He couldn’t risk prison time and keeping a low profile was good for staying off his parents and the GIWs radar. So instead he just worked on taking the tires.

Unknown to him. He was being watched from the roof tops by a certain crime lord. Who’s been following a string of petty thefts for the past few weeks and has heard tales of the “phantom pickpocket” (heheheh). As well as some of the crime alley kids gathering in a new spot. He liked to keep tabs on them to make sure they were alright. So when he sees Bat adoption bait stealing his tires in less than two seconds flat and the pit lurches finally recognizing the cause of the intrusive feeling he’s felt for weeks. He drops down to the ground and walks over to the kid.

“Impressive honestly. I admire your work.” The Redhood. The smirk was almost audible as he relished in the familiarity of the situation.

Danny looked at the large figure before him. He’s heard tales of the Redhood. The protector of crime alley. Clearly some form of liminal as the whole area was clearly marked as his territory. So Danny had been doing his best to conceal his presence and his own ectoplasm under the crime lords to not be noticed. Which meant not transforming and using almost of his powers. Clearly he needed some practice. Danny was currently holding both tires and took one step back away from the beast.

“Relax kid. I just wanna know why you’re stealing the tires.” Redhood said.

“I need them.” Danny replied quickly and eyes his roots for escape.

“I doubt you have a bike kid. You’re probs gonna pawn or sell them. So what do you need the money for. I can get you some help-“Redhood said stepping closer and instantly regretting it because of the look of fear before the kid vanished.

Danny was short and skittish and immediately turned invisible and booked it. Phasing through the nearest building and proceeding to run back to his bases of operations. He dropped the tires off on a nearby roof top before making his way back. He cursed in silence because he forgot the soup.

“Life clearly has a sense of humor.” Jason mumbled as he turned on his comm.

“Hey O. I need some help tracking down my tires. I’m also gonna need some medical supplies. If you could get one of the birds to deliver it. I would appreciate it.” Jason said picking up the abandoned shopping bag that contained premade warm soup.

“Tires? That’s oddly specific…. What happened?” Oracle inquired but rapid typing could easily be heard as she started working on his request.

“A kid just stole my tires.”

He turned the comm down in preparation and wasn’t surprised to hear laughter erupt from Oracle. He sighed with a smile. As much as Bruce annoyed him. Clearly they were more alike than he thought. He was gonna find the little meta bandit.

(Comments are appreciated)