hey lovelies! 🤍i'm finally back with glowettee hotline

abbey sent in the sweetest question to the glowettee hotline about something i think so many of us struggle with. that persistent anxiety that whispers "you could do more" even after you've literally been studying for hours and hours? yeah, i know that voice all too well.

i was literally up until 3am last night reorganizing my color-coded study guides even though i'd already finished them, so trust me when i say i understand that perfectionist energy. there's something about academics that brings out that need for control in all of us, right?

first, i want you to know that what you're experiencing is actually super common among high-achievers. that anxiety isn't a sign that you're doing something wrong - it's actually your brain being a little too good at wanting to succeed. your brain has basically created this false equation that anxiety = productivity, when actually they're totally different things.

when i was in my worst perfectionist spiral last semester (we don't talk about the great midterm meltdown of 2024), my academic counselor shared something that literally changed everything for me. she called it "productive completion" versus "perfectionist completion" and the difference is everything.

⋆.ೃ࿔:･ why your brain keeps doing this ･:࿔ೃ.⋆

your brain has been rewarded for being anxious in the past. every time you've pushed yourself to do "just one more thing" because of anxiety, your brain logged that as a win. it doesn't realize how exhausted and burnt out you're becoming.

also? uncertainty is literally uncomfortable for our brains on a neurological level. your organized nature (which is actually a superpower when balanced!) means your brain craves that feeling of "doneness" - but perfectionism keeps moving the goalpost so you never actually reach it.

⋆.ೃ࿔:･ practical things that actually help ･:࿔ೃ.⋆

create a "done list" instead of just a to-do list. physically write down everything you've accomplished in a study session. when anxiety says "you've done nothing," you have literal evidence to the contrary.

implement a physical "closing ritual" to signal to your brain that work time is over. i close my laptop, put my books in my bag, and light this little vanilla candle that's only for post-study relaxation. your brain needs these concrete transitions.

use time-based boundaries rather than task-based ones. "i will study for 2 focused hours" is better than "i will study until i feel done" because perfectionism ensures you'll never feel done.

try the 5-4-3-2-1 grounding technique when anxiety spirals hit. name 5 things you can see, 4 things you can touch, 3 things you can hear, 2 things you can smell, and 1 thing you can taste. it literally interrupts the anxiety pathway in your brain.

create a "worry hour" where you give yourself permission to stress about academics - but only during that designated time. when anxious thoughts come outside that hour, tell them "not now, i'll think about you at 4pm."

practice self-compassion statements that feel authentic to you. mine is "being imperfect doesn't mean i'm ineffective." find yours and repeat it when that voice starts up.

⋆.ೃ࿔:･ the deeper work ･:࿔ೃ.⋆

here's the thing about perfectionism that took me forever to understand - it's often a protection mechanism. somewhere along the way, you learned that being perfect kept you safe from criticism or failure or whatever scary thing your brain is trying to avoid.

the real question to gently ask yourself is: what would happen if you did "just enough" instead of everything possible? what are you afraid would occur? usually when we dig into this, we find some core beliefs that need updating.

for me, i realized i had this weird belief that if i wasn't constantly anxious about academics, it meant i didn't care enough. which is obviously not true! you can care deeply about your studies while still having boundaries and rest.

abbey, i want you to know that your worth isn't measured by how exhausted you are at the end of a study session. your organized nature is a gift - but it should serve you, not control you.

sending you the warmest thoughts and a reminder that you're doing so much better than you think you are. your anxiety is lying to you about how much is "enough."

xoxo, mindy 🤍

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ℋ𝑒𝓁𝓁𝑜, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐲 𝐩𝐚𝐠𝐞!

· • ❀ -- -- ٠ ⊰ ꕥ ⊱ ٠ -- -- ❀ • ·

my name is eulalia, and I’m a 21 year old writer who loves all things literature and lace and often gets lost in the daydreams ⋆⭒˚｡⋆

on here I’ll reblog quotes, aesthetics, post updates about my book, or just thoughts I have in general! just the usual girl blogging <3

feel free to talk to me, no specific dni (except the usual) as long as you’re kind! friends call me leila/layla or lacy ౨ৎ

currently writing a book called “the secret of the rose garden,” which I’m so so excited about !!

─── ⋆⋅ ☾⋅⋆ ───

┊͙✧˖*°࿐

─ ⊹ ⊱ ☆ ⊰ ⊹ ─

more about me:

— ౨ৎ she/her, xxi, infp-t, libra, christian, wasian,

❦ exploding wardrobe, 2000s, writing, crafting, pastels, pink, angel wings, silly girl, always unmade bed, bed rotting, porcelain, kittens, flowers, lowkey a grandma, makeup hoarder, messy girl, messy vanity, blush, dior, lip gloss, brown eyeliner, baby face, pearl earrings, doe eyes, dessert lover, can't live without music, always tangled earphones, shopaholic, takes photos of everything, bedazzled computer, party girl, late nights, thrifting, rain, matcha, carrot cake, vanilla, cinnamon rolls, babydoll tops, low waist jeans, mini skirts, lace, stickers, sweets, art, glitter eyeshadow, actually a fairy, nail polish always in purse, the idea of love, all-consuming kind of love, nostalgia, melancholy, philosophy, psychology, pinterest, slavic dolls, victoria’s secret, girl blogging, talks a lot, poetry, journaling, daydreamer, overthinker, thought daughter, history, swans, too obsessed with the idea of perfection but also too tired to try, loves breakfast but never eats it in the mornings, romanticizing life, chronically online ⋆˚₊ 𖤓☽˚.⋆

— ౨ৎ Interests ⋆⭒˚｡⋆

I ❦ reading & writing obviii, but I also like...

tv shows & movies: gossip girl, pretty little liars, the vampire diaries, mean girls, spiderman, childhood shows, twilight, old disney, sleeping beauty, h2o, ever after high, high school musical, clueless, charlie’s angels, 10 things I hate about you, a cinderella story, peter pan 2003, lizzie mcguire, legally blonde, cruel intentions, marie antoinette, priscilla, how to lose a guy in 10 days, 13 going on 30, just my luck, young justice, the oc, brooklyn 99, modern family, gilmore girls, miraculous, true beauty, bridgerton, old barbie, strawberry shortcake, the princess diaries ❀

— please feel free to give me recommendations !!

mp3 player: gracie abrams, tate mcrae, the neighbourhood, chase atlantic, lana del rey, britney spears, billie eilish, taylor swift, artemas, sombr, isabel larosa, rihanna, lady gaga, charli xcx, addison rae, the weeknd, new jeans, illit, le sserafim, ariana grande, ethel cain, mazzy star, etc. ♪

(though I listen to a lot of different artists and songs in general, & I like anything party music)

other kind of cool things: lily rose depp, jennie ruby jane, lindsay lohan, paris hilton, michelle trachtenberg, leighton meester, hilary duff, hayden christensen, natalie portman, emma watson, audrey hepburn, selma blair, kirsten dunst, sofia coppola, adriana lima, aaron taylor johnson, young leo, adrien agreste, dick grayson, wally west, louis partridge, miles morales, cardan greenbriar, jake sim, cha eun-woo, all of new jeans, all pll girls, alana b champion, vs angels, elena gilbert, bonnie bennett, caroline forbes, jeremy gilbert, the salvatore brothers, anne hathaway, drew barrymore, cameron diaz, lucy liu, haley dunphy, rory gilmore, chad michael murray, seth cohen, gabriella montez, troy bolton, marinette, fluttershy, hello kitty, cinnamoroll, my sweet piano, sleeping beauty, bella swan, edward cullen, phoebe tonkin, claire holt, cariba heine, gemma ward, hannah dodd, brooke shields, rachel mcadams, amanda seyfried, cher horowitz, brittany murphy, dakota fanning, elle fanning, sylvia plath, virginia woolf, jane austen ♔

⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅∙∘☽༓☾∘∙•⋅⋅⋅•⋅⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅

˖°❀⋆

🦢 ➷ quotes that kind of feels like me ੈ✩‧₊˚

⋆˚₊ 𖤓☽˚.⋆

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

˖°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･➴ — eulalia.lovelace on insta, threads, pinterest & tiktok ⋆.˚ ☾⭒.˚

.𖥔 ݁ ˖☾𖤓.𖥔 ݁ ˖ ➷ heartedoll on wattpad ੈ✩‧₊˚

why did i get the procrastination type of perfectionism and not the workaholic overachieving perfectionism??