#osdd split

l1k3. alm0st runn1ng aut0p1l0t 1f mak3s s3ns3? 1 can t3ll/f33l s0m3 k1nda d1ff3r3nc3/barr13r b3tw33n m3 and.. h3r. but als0 alm0st f33ls l1k3 a 'g1v1ng up/1n'- l3tt1ng th3 s0lv3r tak3 0v3r wh1l3 watch1ng fr0m th3 backs3at/w1nd0w but n0t? 1f that mak3s s3ns3,,? pr0bably d03snt but 1dk..

c0uld b3 a spl1t.. but 0nly rly happ3ns dur1ng r3ally bad d1ss0c1at10n sp3lls n n3v3r h3ar/s3ns3 h3r/1t 0uts1d3 0f that- 1 m3an. v v rar3ly but unsur3..

Its taken me probably about 2 years to get to this point and its taken documentation, constant asking myself questions and so much patience

These questions include

Who am i

What names do i resonate with

What do i look like inside

Where am i from

What do i remember

What is familiar about where im at, and have i fronted here yet(often asked at work or in my current home)

How do i know the people around me

Do i particularly like or dislike something

What are my base emotions (alters cant be boiled down to singular emotions necessarily but some tend to experience one more than others and it can help section them off)

How old are they

How many are there

Can they speak or are they semi-verbal, mute, or do they talk in ways that arent words(some use music or animal noises or just communicate telepathically)

There are loads of other questions and its not like i go through the entire list every time but things like this have helped me figure out a lot more about my system. It's about who affects what, what triggers who, and how everyone navigates the world and why.

I made a picrew last night (such a cool concept, I love it so much!!) and this is what most closely represents my appearance!

I hope to be able to make friends and help as many people as possible! Can’t wait to get started!!

-Fern🌿

Coelocanth Clarence Magmathea

However we do know:

He's related to Robyn somehow. In the way that we'd pair them together in counts and organize them side by side. We dunno what the correlation is but its similar energy to Kiba, Zim, and Wolf [in slight ways]

He is a king cheetah, the name King was considered. He has a big scruff like a cub who never lost their protective fur, and fluffy head hair that is light and has dark markings in it we havent perceived yet.

He's a sweetheart, remembers pain in the body, has an unfortunate addiction to cortisol.

But he also remembered space. He came out after watching owl house and space documentaries. We've been sensing him as we did JWST research. He commented about HUBBLE before we knew he was there. Still submerged in the liquid abyss, he saw visions of the Cosmosphere near our homeland when we were children. He remembers space.

long story short we have an alter who is an introject of our abuser and we thought was just kind of only there as a means to berate/upset our system members because it’s what we were used to back home and ig was ingrained into our brain.

turns out that during this split, this alter kind of fragmented and now we have another alter (we think with the same name) who seems to contain all of our past anger and a lot of our trauma. the original alter just seems to be super fragmented now? like not even an alter anymore?? just like a collection of emotions and parts??

our internal communication has been pretty screwy recently because of a fight between alters so this is just the information I could kind of gather??

honestly no idea what’s going on so advice is very very much appreciated /g