seen from Germany
seen from Maldives
seen from France
seen from United States
seen from Ireland
seen from Spain
seen from Ireland
seen from Russia
seen from Türkiye
seen from France
seen from T1
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Indonesia
seen from Ireland
seen from Indonesia
seen from Netherlands
seen from United States
seen from China
seen from United States
[TEXT ID: this system is insecure about their alter count and worries there may be more hidden]
[IMG ID: a dark, desaturated blue rectangular box with an icon of broken glass to the left, and the text 'this system splits a lot due to numerous factors, please do not comment on their alter count' to the right.]
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With all the love in my heart we have gOt to stop splitting. Or slow tf down and take a fuck ass BREAK
We once saw someone on a tiktok common section claim that "14 year old systems claiming to have like 400+ alters are always fake".. as if there's like an age limit for how many alter you can have? What— "oh, sorry, you're just 14, you should only have 40 alters!" Huh!?
.
What do you count when you want to share your alter count?
All alters that are fully distinct (with amnesia and personality)
All alters that you are sure exist
All alters including fragments as long as they show up repeatidly
All alters and fragments that ever showed up (even once, inner or outer)
All alters (minus fragments) that currently front
All alters and fragments that currently front
The amount you guess there is
Other
Cause depending on us, we would answer anything between 3-50.
It’s really funny to see the divide between my irl and online friends and telling them we have 16 parts, because they react like:
IRL: HOLY SHIT (a lot)
Online: holy shit (not a lot)
Without fail.
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Is it okay that we've never known the real count of our head mates? We have very heavy barriers between us + aphantasia and as a result even though I'm always in front (idk why? I've just never ever been able to leave the front, I'm not always in control though, when I'm in front and not in control t feels like I'm watching the body from above) and sometimes I'm aware that someone is in front with us, I still am not aware of how many of us there are or what most of them do. There have been many times where I can look back and say ohh someone else was in front w/ me and that's why we behaved that way but I cant easily identify anyone at all especially when I don't even rlly know what makes me "me"? All of us refer to the body as "I" frequently but it's more like different versions of the same person with different likes/dislikes sometimes and things like that, and I have some of that stuff in my notebooks but I can just never actually talk to them much at all and have no idea how many of us exist
hey, this is totally fine and tbh we feel like this is a normal experience for many systems, especially those who are newly discovered or still trying to make sense of their plurality. it took us over 2 years to get more or less of an accurate headcount of how many alters we have, and that was with a ton of work internally and pretty intensive therapy every week. and tbh there are probably even more alters that us in the main fronting group don’t know about… it comes with the territory of having dissociation issues.
it’s okay to not know how many headmates are in your system. maybe that answer will come with time and effort, or maybe not, but we think what’s more important is showing respect, kindness, and acceptance to the headmates that you do meet.
if you’re not already, you may find it useful to start using the simplyplural app to keep track of the headmates you know about. you can leave notes in some conspicuous place to urge the other members of your system to use it too. that way, y’all can collaborate to start building a database of your headmates so you can at least start trying to get a better idea of how many members your system has. of course, you could alternatively start keeping track of this information in a notebook or document. hopefully, with time and patience, you’ll be able to get a better idea of the size and scope of your system.
we hope this helps… we know trying to learn how many members are in your system can be a daunting task, especially if you have strong dissociative barriers between headmates. but we’re wishing you the best of luck with figuring this out! rest assured, your experience is pretty common, especially for those of us who struggle with heavy dissociative barriers between members.
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