#alignment terminology

when your gender experience (gender, desired/current presentation, dysphoria, other expressions) doesnt fit the human binary of gender alignments.  Instead of male or female aligned, one would feel like theyre more aligned with animals, plants, things, and/or concepts. These terms were made with alterhumans and xenogender individuals in mind, but any nonbinary person who feels xenic fits their identity may use it.

Hello, my name is Hatch, I’m nonbinary, and I have a new term for yall.

What the hell is this term?

Its a term made to help people, like myself and some of my friends, explain their gender in relation to the binary. Now, I love binary aligned people with all of my heart, but I havent felt aligned in that way in a long time. I’ve been hesitant to call myself non-aligned, because my gender IS aligned. Just not male or female. My identity is also highly affected by how I was treated growing up, mental illnesses, and alterhuman identities, I figured I should just make this happen.

Why is it useful?

It can help people explain how their other identities affect them, gender-wise, and it can also help people, like myself, who refuse to force themselves under acceptible terms for their genders.

How do you even say xenic?

Zeh-nick.

Can I call myself Xenic?

Most likely! If my explanation here isn’t enough, youre more than welcome to ask me and talk to me about it!

I’d like to clarify since there’s some misinterpretation of my and other’s critical stance about the way binary alignment terminology is used.

Some people have came to me and others who share my views, being defensive about gender alignment and I can understand why. I used to be a mod on a tumblr blog called “demigenders” a few years back. We made a lot of posts in support of AFAB demigirls and AMAB demiboys, because transphobes and exorsexists were telling them that they were “basically just cis!”, which they aren’t. So now, if you’re a non-binary person who feels close to/mostly a binary gender, I can understand why you might misinterpret our stance.

But this is NOT about being against non-binary people who feel close to a binary gender. You are a VALID NON-BINARY PERSON. You are NOT ‘basically cis’. You are just as non-binary as any non-aligned non-binary person. 

This is instead being critical of the way binary alignment is being used to CALL people who are closer to a binary gender, or relate to a binary gender socially etc, “women” and “men” without their consent, or group people into binary-alignment without their consent either because of their AGAB, what gender they feel closest to, their presentation and other factors.Basically, it’s being critical of misgendering and treating you as if you’re just a binary person, or just a cis person.

Oh god if I can’t relate to this ask...

Hey! I’m in a very similar position, because the comfort of having such a strong community around me (sapphic) was very appealing compared to the lesser populated, less well known non-aligned nb communities where there’s not as much stuff for us. But it was causing too much dysphoria to be constantly referred to as a woman. It felt like the rest of my gender was ignored or not respected...and when I talked about not being Just a woman, they told me I didn’t belong. I was also frustrated about how if you didn’t consider yourself more of a man or a woman, not aligned only to one, there was nothing out there for you. We were shut out if we didn’t align, but also our whole existence, of not wanting to be aligned or considering yourself aligned to both somehow, was completely ignored. Where do you go then?

All I can say is....if we give it a chance to build and help boost posts made by non-aligned nb folk too, about their attractions and gender, new terminology like diamoric and feminamoric and viramoric, positivity and moodboards and spreading new blogs and so on...that same kind of community can be available for us all, and become Our New Familiar. We shouldn’t HAVE to stick with something inaccurate that we know isn’t right, especially when there are other ways to discuss the issues alignment was used for. You can discuss non-straight attractions (new words have been coined and need spreading!) still without alignment. You can discuss not having male privilege and disadvantage from the patriarchy without alignment (a group of friends are working on coining terms to help with that on a discord server).

others tell you it is

your presentation is viewed as very masculine or feminine (whether by choice or not)

others percieve you as male/female

most of your gender is male/female

others try to apply it to you without your consent

I have a pretty shit memory but for a while people were using transneutral for conversations around treating transmasc/transfem as a binary and the issue of exorsexism against transneutral nonbinarys being erased etc. but maybe those are no longer seen as equivalent? (I see nonaligned and transneutral are two different terms personally)

Obviously it differs from identifying as said gender, elsewise people wouldn't have developed the term. But all I can really understand of it is "politically and/or socially aligned with [X gender] but not that gender", which feels very...buzzwordy and not super helpful.

I also feel I see it used as "[gender]-lite", as a way of categorising people as one of the binary genders for classification purposes, while still paying some service to their gender identities.

One thing I have got is you can't be aligned to a binary gender if you (partly) identify as the other binary gender. E.g. I've seen various sapphic blogs saying that genderfluid people who are ever fully men are not their intended audience.

But can you be male-aligned demigirl/woman-aligned demiboy?

Is aligning yourself with one of the binary genders a political stance? Does it indicate a social position you occupy related to how you are perceived? Can it change regardless of your identity?