☁ Have you ever forgiven a partner when you shouldn't have?
lil bit of salt, as a treat @acertiijo
yes, hi, hello--- lemme tell you a story that spans half a decade.
so, in 2020, I picked this hobby back up. I made a lot of great friends, it was a great way to keep my brain active, etc, etc. ---then in November of 2020, i began going through an incredibly nasty divorce. i mention this bc i was very emotionally vulnerable and was very very very willing to let people treat me in iffy ways if it meant that they felt ok.
weird, co-dependent, very unsexy of me i know. i'm very lucky that most of the friends i made DIDN'T take advantage of this. i'd say only maybe 3 people knew about it. (two of whom i am still relatively close to) ----but the third person who knew about it used it to their advantage.
they would check in on me, and we would rp, and it seemed really cool--- until i took a break for awhile. and by awhile i mean for five years.
now i kept in touch with the other two people, we had eachother on snapchat, they also quit rping--- we just became normal friends. the third person never kept in touch, and that's fine. ---but every time i popped back up on tumblr, even if it was for 2 days in 2023, they would DM me something that was incredibly manic and attention seeking. i would do my normal like "oh hey, how are you!" and chat with them, but every time they would just like--- weirdly appear in my discord or dms, even if they had deleted all of their blogs. i brushed it off, until this recent time i came back
same thing--- they appeared within a few days, and we went through the same weird lil catching up. but now, after a few years of separation from trauma, i've begun to set up boundaries. anyone who's chatted with me OOC about OOC stuff knows that i make a point to 1. ask people if they are sure they want to chat about something and 2. redirect when i don't have the spoons with chatting about something. this person couldn't handle those boundaries, at all.
they would message me and if i didn't "respond in time" or said "hey i don't have the energy, lets chat tomorrow", they would go vague post about it. i forgave that for awhile but THEN they came over and randomly accused me, at 7 am on a thursday, of being a terrible unfriendly person.
---i still forgave them, bc RSD is a bitch. but it sucked, and it hurt--- but then when they came back to apologize i said "give me a week to message YOU first. let me process this bc it sucked" and uhhhh they couldn't handle that. so i had to do a series of hardblocks. it sucked, i'm never putting up with that again. at the first sign of someone not tolerating my teeny tiny boundaries now i'm like BYE. so idk
anyways, that's my life.
