BESTIES ✋🏻I haven't stopped thinking about that "what if their girls are nastier than them" ask y'all dropped a while ago 😭 because imagine the GIRLIES when they're a little tipsy. walking, horny little disasters. I'm talking zero filter. gremlin behavior activated. the boys? panicking. sweating. blushing. SUFFERING 🤌🏻
ROY, the dinner date menace (your friends are there too)
you whisper filth into his ear everywhere, so that's nothing new, but tonight you're tipsy, glowing, leg bouncing under the table. your pasta is currently untouched aaand the cocktails keep coming. he's already eyeing you like a threat, but you obviously don't give a shit
You, leaning in and giggling drunkenly: "Roy. Baby. Look at me. I want your dick."
Roy, blinking like you just smacked him in the face: "We're at Olive Garden, pretty thing."
You, beaming, palming his dick under the table: "Your breadstick is the only one I want."
Roy: silently shoves some pasta in his mouth to stop himself from moaning
Dinah is wheezing. Jason is completely unfazed.
DICK, the social event saboteur
he's trying to behave, shake hands, make Bruce proud. you're tipsy and sparkly and currently ruining his life (dw, he loves it here)
You, whispering hot into his ear: "Do you think if I bend over to "pick up" this napkin and stick my ass out you'll take me home early?"
Dick, visibly short circuiting, adjusts his tie for the fifth time: "You've already done that twice, my love."
You, giggling like you don't know what you're doing: "It's working though, right?"
Dick: tight smile, nods once, excuses you both from the conversation
Bruce is in the background, sighing into his wine because he knows exactly how whipped Dick is for you and really, he saw this coming after your second cocktail. third just confirmed it
JASON, the at home victim of thirst
he's on the couch. relaxed. minding his business. you? tucked into his side, tipsy and horny with zero decorum
You, squinting at him hard: "Take off your shirt, Jay."
Jason, eyeing you suspiciously: "Baby, what—why?"
You, licking your lips and shrugging: "I just wanna see your tiddies."
Jason groans, drags his hand down his face, lifts his shirt anyway. "...Christ."
seriously considers prayer while you motorboat his pecs like a giggly menace
and YES, you bet the girlies end up fucking their men until they're so full of cum they can't even think. legs shaking, brains scrambled, bodies wrecked. the boys never stood a chance 😌
thank yew for coming to my ted talk 🏃🏻♀️ stay nasty, besties, love youuu
