pulvis et umbra sumus

We’re officially less than 100 days until ACOTAR 6 releases and I wanted to share a commission to celebrate 🥳 I'm so excited to finally read more about Elain and Azriel's journey. It’s going to be a beautiful ride and I can't wait to see where SJM takes us 💙🩷

Art by malotte000 on Instagram and commissioned by me!

Something tells me that if their kiss gets interrupted again, Elain won't let it end there.

This time, she'd be the one closing the distance, taking Azriel by surprise, and finally stealing the kiss they've both been waiting far too long for.

Enough interruptions, enough longing, Elain's getting her kiss.

A huge thank you to @aurithemoon for this absolutely breathtaking comic. I'm completely obsessed with the way you draw Elain and Azriel. Thank you for sharing your incredible talent with us.

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⁣⁣⁣⤞ Art by @aurithemoon

⁣⁣⁣⤞ Commissioned by me

⁣⁣⁣⤞ Please do not repost without permission

⁣⁣⁣⤞ Instagram

Turns out Elriel’s story was always too big for just one book, so even the author had to split it into three.

So we all remember how SJM posted Guilty as Sin in her Instagram story a while back ? When she was probably working on ACOTAR 6 🥀 ? Well let’s come back to that, and dissect it to see how it might pertain to Elain ( and also elriel) story in the next book.

I know this analysis has probably done a million times but hey ! It’s always fun to see how everyone interpret it, especially with SJM recent update on the book.

Let’s dive right in :

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“Drowning in the Blue Nile/ He sent me “Downtown Lights””

There is blue ( self explanatory)

But there is also the reference to The Downtown Lights - The Blue Nile which is literally about longing, yearning, not knowing if the other feels the same ( “ Sometimes I walk away / When all I really wanna do / is love and hold you right” ) which awfully sounds like Azriel when he left Elain in the foyer after nearly kissing her.

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“My boredom's bone deep, this cage was once just fine”

I think by now we all realized Elain is no longer the fragile flower, boring female in the background. Even others start to slowly notice it. Even us, readers, can sense the shift .

But Nesta cut her off, seething at the pity about to be thrown her way. “Look who decided to grow claws after all,” she crooned. “Maybe you’ll become interesting at last, Elain.”

Elain remained in the doorway, her face pale but her expression harder than Nesta had ever seen it. “You do not decide what I can and cannot do, Nesta.”

Challenge filled each word. Challenge—from Elain, of all people.

“Shall I tend to my little garden forever?” When Nesta flinched, Elain said, “You can’t have it both ways. You cannot resent my decision to lead a small, quiet life while also refusing to let me do anything greater.”

In the Feysand BC, they even heavily hint it. Feyre says that maybe Elain is not as docile as everyone thinks she is. Rhys agrees that there is something about her.

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“I dream of cracking locks, throwing my life to the wolves or the ocean rocks”

SJM herself said in an interview about how Elain’s dreams will be…tormented, brutal :

“Elain’s now going to have dreams about ripping ivy out and the ivy creeping in through the windows to strangle her at night, because let me tell you, the ivy does not want to go.

Although taking about ivy; there is this idea of Elain escaping something suffocating, getting out of a situation, a feeling.

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“Crashing into him tonight, he’s a paradox”

Again, the foyer scene. They did not expect to see each other there. She did not expects things to turn out how they did, seeing, smelling, feeling Azriel want and need. She also did not expect him to pull out last minute, saying this was “mistake”.

Azriel :

“Azriel’s hand slid up her neck, burying in her thick hair. Tilting her face the way he wanted it. Elain's mouth parted slightly, her eyes scanning his before fluttering shut. Offer and permission. He nearly groaned with relief and need as he lowered his head toward hers.”

Also Azriel a second later ;

“Azriel was left standing before Elain, who still awaited his kiss. His stomach twisted as he pulled his hand from her hair and step back”

In this scene, in Elain’s eyes ( who’s not aware of Rhys being here), Azriel is the archetype of a paradox. One second he’s all in, and the next he says it’s a mistake ? My dearest Elain is disoriented, not understanding what went wrong (😢)

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“I'm seeing visions, am I bad? Or mad? Or wise?”

Elain being a Seer. No one, not even herself, understood at first. They all thought she had gone mad, except Azriel who was able to understand her, going as far as telling the other she is the one they need ( kinda wise) :

“She doesn’t need anything,” Azriel answered without so much as looking at Lucien.

Elain was staring at the spymaster now—unblinkingly.

“We’re the ones who need …” Azriel trailed off. “A seer,” he said, more to himself than us. “The Cauldron made you a seer.”

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“These fatal fantasies giving way to labored breath. Taking all of me, we've already done it in my head”

Elain in lusting over him too. She probably dreamed of him the same way he did of her. Azriel saw her shivering and shuddering, smelled her arousal, offer and permission. :

“Her arousal drifted up to him”

“"Yes," Elain breathed, like she read the decision. Just this taste in the dead of the longest night of the year, where only the Mother might witness them.”

“Azriel’s hand slid up her neck, burying in her thick hair. Tilting her face the way he wanted it. Elain's mouth parted slightly, her eyes scanning his before fluttering shut. Offer and permission.

The song is probably an inspiration and a way for SJM to say Elain feels the same.

And people think Azriel is disgusting, only lusting after Elain, as if Feyre didn’t start with Rhys saying she wanted “fun”, a “distraction”. Of course Azriel also feels lust, juste like Elain does. The books, ( and their books ;) ) will explore it all, including spicy scenes, just like SJM did in most of her books.

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“If long suffering propriety is what they want from me, they don't know how you've haunted me so stunningly.”

We know Nesta, Azriel, and Elain herself are not a big fan of Elain mating bond. They want her to be free, to choose freely. Even though nesta is mated, even she sees Elain mating bond as some kind of toxic propriety. Azriel can’t stand the smell of it, can’t stand the image of Elain and Lucien together. Even Nesta notices it ( and also doesn’t seem to disapprove the idea of them, which says a lot judging how she loves Elain). Elain herself shy away from it, not wanting to explore it, seeing it as a prison almost. And yet Rhys, and to some extent Feyre ( although I love them both), are encouraging her toward him, partly as a pawn for political gains.

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“ I choose you and me... Religiously”

I mean… this one is kinda straightforward. The mention of choice and religion. The whole debate on Elain’s choice. Her marrying for love and beauty. Not for political gain like it was predicted for Nesta. The multiple mentions of questioning the cauldron ( Feyre, nesta, azriel, elain…), their religion, when comes the question of Azriel and Elain. What if their religion was choosing, being each other choice. Azriel questioning the cauldron so outwardly in the BC, going to save Elain at the risk of dying. Elain buying him gifts (but not Lucien), choosing thé spend the night showing him her garden plans. Her willing to kiss him although Lucien is upstairs. They are choosing each other again, and again, and again… almost religiously.

Also, SJM talking about exploring mating bonds and one’s agency over it, choosing someone for love, choosing by ourselves. I know she said she won’t tell if she’s writing about it or not but come onnnnn, why would she even say that and never mention it or using it again ?

Anyway, thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.

©️Credit ( for the wonderful dividers) : @olenvasynyt

** Permission to post it was granted by the artist Do not repost/edit the art without permission Please, support the artist on their page too **

Artist : Tamias栗

This isn’t a "drag" post. This is a please think before you post kind of post. Some stuff has been going on in this fandom that really needs to be addressed — not to hate, but to reflect and do better.

1. A poll about college degrees was posted to "prove" which ship has the smartest fans. Yeah... that’s classist.

Asking which ship (Gwynriel, Elriel, Elucien) has more readers with degrees, especially in STEM, to basically say "our side is smarter." That’s not cute.

You can be smart without a degree.

You can love books without going to college.

You can be brilliant, analytical, and insightful even if life didn’t give you the same chances.

Being from a poor background doesn’t give you a free pass to use your education as a flex against others. It just ends up reinforcing the same classist mindset that holds people back in the first place.

2. A wlw fanart was posted and it got "sisters" "friends" comments. That is homophobic, even if you didn’t mean it that way.

This under a sapphic fanart even though the OP clearly intended it as romantic. When people (including the OP) spoke up, the response was “We ship Emorie, so we’re not homophobic.”

Here’s the thing:

Liking one queer ship doesn’t mean you can’t do something homophobic. "I am bisexual, I am not homophobic." Being bi doesn’t cancel out the harm caused by dismissing a queer romantic ship as "sisterly."

Nobody called you a homophobic person but your actions toward that fanart were absolutely homophobic.

Queer people have been seeing their relationships dismissed as "just close friends" or "sisters" for decades. So yes, that word carries weight. It’s not harmless.

If someone from the queer community says "Hey, that hurts" it’s not the time to say "But I ship this one gay couple." It’s the time to listen.

3. Stealing and editing Elriel fanart to turn it into Gwynriel? Also not okay.

Fanart theft is still theft. People put time, love, and effort into art. Editing their work without permission especially to erase the original ship is super disrespectful.

If you love your ship, commission art for it. Don’t just take someone else’s.

And here’s the frustrating part:

Every time this kind of behavior gets called out, the people doing it twist the narrative. They’ll say they’re being "bullied" or "attacked," and somehow turn themselves into the victim while taking zero accountability.

They’ve never been wrong, no matter how many times they’ve been called out.

Meanwhile, the people speaking up who are just trying to defend boundaries, respect art, or stand up for queer rep are the ones being labeled as "toxic." This is exactly how they keep getting away with it.

By refusing to reflect, by twisting the story, and by shutting down any chance for growth.

It’s not bullying to ask people to take responsibility. It’s not drama to want better from a fandom space. And it’s not wrong to call out harm especially when it keeps repeating.

Lastly, to everyone out there without a degree, still reading and loving stories, you matter. Your voice counts. You’re smart, creative, and valid.

To queer shippers, wlw fans, and the artists who bring those stories to life, thank you. Your work is powerful. Your ships are beautiful.

Let’s just… be better to each other. Fandom is supposed to be fun and safe and creative not a place for elitism, erasure, or stealing.

Star-Crossed | @elriel-month

They shouldn’t look.

They shouldn’t touch.

But the space between them hums with everything they don’t say, every stolen glance, every brush of skin that lingers just a second too long.

Even with her mate nearby, it’s impossible to ignore it: the gravity between them. The unspoken knowing. The temptation of something they’re not allowed to want.

Rhysand’s order be damned.

Because some things can’t be ruled or reasoned away, not tension, not fire.

They are THE forbidden romance. The love story buried in shadows.

The kind of connection that exists between the silences, just shy of a confession.

Thank you to the incredible @thesleepingfoxy for capturing this tension, that pull, that ache, so exquisitely.

⊱❊⊰⁣⁣⁣

⁣⁣⁣⤞ Art by @thesleepingfoxy

⁣⁣⁣⤞ Commissioned by me

⁣⁣⁣⤞ Please do not repost without permission

⁣⁣⁣⤞ Instagram

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Close to Her Chest is officially posted on AO3! I completely reworked the first chapter, so it might be worth a reread :-) I’ll be touching up the next few chapters and getting them posted over the next couple of weeks!

If you ship gwynriel? Great!

If you ship elriel? Great!

If you ship elucien? Great!

If your ship doesn’t end up being canon? Gosh darn! But that is what fanfictions are for!! (believe me, i’ve had wayyyy too many ships not be endgame. you’ll be okay!)

At the end of the day, a fandom’s purpose is to come together to celebrate and discuss things that you enjoy. Things that bring you joy! It’s not supposed to be like this.

Just ship whatever ship you want to ship. Don’t harass someone because they ship something. Don’t yuck another person’s yum! Let them find the same joy you find within your own ship!

Because at the end of the day….these are fictional characters. It really is never going to be that deep.

And if it has become that deep for you? Maybe it’s time to take a break from the fandom and take a breather! I don’t mean that in a mean way. But it’s supposed to be fun and if you aren’t finding joy by being here then genuinely what’s the point? I don’t look at opposing ship’s tags because it’s not fun for me! I’m here to enjoy the content of my ship and let others do the same.