Warning: may contain Porn. Lots of Porn.

The Original

Wait, actually the original? This post is historic

when i was a kid we had a santa cookies plate with a black santa on it (me and my family are white) so i assumed santa was black. my mom told me the thing where santas at the mall and stuff arent the real santa but they just work for him, so seeing white santas in other places never made me question it.

literally the north pole ^

I GOT A FUCKING RAISE THE POTATO WORKED WTF

This potato works. Every. Fucking. Time.

Then bring me luck

the day after I posted this last time I was notified that I was selected for a really cool mentorship gig and got an unrelated glowing review at work

“Oh, that’s pretty nice. And it looks like something I could dra-”

Witchcraft

Behold! The printing titty!

I normally tag these posts “specific ass machines” after a minor meme that blew through Tumblr, but I was tempted to tag this one “specific boob machines”.

This is a incredible addition to my post here. It looks like they've remade on twitter over at "Meow25Meow2" so awesome news there.

Female presenting machines

God didn't give me a dick cause he knew I'd be abusing that thang. Call me mourning wood the way I'd be fucking trees

BOY THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO SAVE AS A DRAFT

Begging everyone on the internet to stop smoothing out their middle aged men and draw wrinkles for the love of god I promise it's so fun you'll love it Come into my wine cellar

Did you just DeWalt my fucking white

@hotwngz

God FORBID women do anything!