Call Me Ca$hlyn

“You guys are babysitting? I didn’t know Eridians did that.” I look over at the two cuddling on the floor. Rocky has perched himself on top of Adrian, soaking in their heat.

“Obvious. Other Eridians get busy. Need help watching over pebbles.” Rocky clicks out. Two of his legs hang off the side of Adrian’s carapace and I notice they swing back and forth a bit.

“Well my bad.” I roll my eyes with a smile. “I would love to. I haven’t been given the chance to see baby Eridians yet.” I’ve only taught more adolescent Eridians in my class, not toddler and below age. I’m actually a little nervous at the thought.

“Grace must be gentle.” Adrian adds a bit sternly, shifting to stand. Rocky climbs off and stretches a bit, kinda like a cat.

I scoff “Of course I’ll be gentle! Who do you think I am?” I fake a shocked expression, hand over my chest.

“Grace is…clumsy.” Gee thanks. “Grace be more careful than usual.” Rocky adds as they both head towards the door.

“I promise to be more careful than usual.” I hold my right hand up like I’m giving an oath though I don’t think either one of them actually knows what that means.

I lean over the couch to watch them head out. Adrian lets out a low giggle. “Adrian Rocky be back soon with pebbles.”

They shut the door behind them as I slump back into the couch. I feel a bit giddy, my first time seeing little baby Eridians! I hope they’re as cute as I imagine them to be.

——————

Around an hour later I hear a very soft knock at the door.

“Coming!” I scramble over to let them in. As I open the door Rocky pushes himself in and then herds me out of the way.

“Grace move out of Adrian way.” He lightly taps at my shins. I stagger back a bit, trying not to step on Rocky in the process. Adrian walks in holding six little rocks in one arm, little sounds of random notes coming from them. They are all buzzing with life, little legs and claws moving and squirming about.

I let out a little coo as Adrian walked up in front of me, letting me get a good look, “They're so tiny! They look adorable!” They look like they would fit in the palm of my hand! A few are thick and stubby while others are thin. So thin it’s a little scary. I desperately want to reach out and touch them but decide not until I get an okay at the very least.

Adrian hums “Yes. They are.” They stop for a moment, letting me bask in their adorableness. “Pebbles will love you Grace.”

“Why me?” I smile a bit, leaning my face closer to the little babies in their arms. I see their claws reach up at me, their claws making grabbing motions.

“Grace is new. New sounds and new species. Grace is whole new experience.” They shift to move past me to settle on the floor in the house. “Also…Grace is cute and nice.” They add, making me a bit flustered. Me and Rocky quickly follow and Rocky curls up next to Adrian while I stand awkwardly. I’m not sure where I should sit.

Adrian makes a circle on the floor using their arms as a little fence to keep them in. They carefully lower the pebbles into the circle and they all immediately start moving. Adrian lifts a claw in my direction and I take it in my hand. They guide me back to the circle as Rocky shoos the little baby’s away from me so I can sit in the circle too. I lean my back against Adrian as I feel my excitement and anxiety rise.

”Pebbles not communicate well yet but still very curious. Can understand most of language.” Rocky explains but pauses “…Grace heart beat fast. Calm. You will do great.” He reassures as the pebbles make their way over to me. They are careful and cautious but their curiosity seems to be winning.

“O-okay…can I, um, touch them? Like, pet them?” I ask as they move closer and closer. Little legs scuttling in my direction.

“Of course.” Rocky takes my hand and places it out in front of me, low to the ground. It’s like if I were to meet a new dog for the first time. Letting them sniff my hand to make sure I’m not a threat. They seem to stop their advance towards me at the movement, keeping a distance.

“Aw! Hey little guys! My name is Grace—“

I suddenly realize I have absolutely no idea if they can understand me. Heat creeps up my cheeks as Adrian gently repeats what I said beside me. Right. Of course they can’t speak English.

Not my brightest moment.

I keep my hand as still as possible, hoping one comes up to me. I feel my anxiety rise even more as the thought of them hating or being scared of me crosses my mind.

I tense at a feeling on my head and I glance up. Adrian has started petting me softly, I think to calm my nerves but also to show the pebbles I mean no harm.

One brave pebble scuttle up and places a single claw on one of my fingers. It squeezes softly and chirps excitedly. God, there so cute!

That seems to be enough to convince the others and they all rush towards my hand. Little claws grab at my fingers, squishing and pulling. I giggle a bit, clenching my fingers ever so slightly. They seem to like it and they all let out little squeaks and trills.

I hear Rocky and Adrian giggle from somewhere above me.

“I think they like me!” I whisper excitedly grinning with a goofy smile. I carefully tip my hand over letting them explore. Tiny claws rub over my knuckles curiously, feeling the difference between my soft palm and the bonier top of my hand.

One pebble wanders past my wrist and grabs onto my pant leg. I tense instinctively, fighting the urge to pull away and accidentally shake them off.

Apparently, once again, one brave pebble is all the encouragement the others needed. They swarm my leg almost immediately. I let out a startled laugh as claws climb up my jeans and into my lap, forcing me to lean back against Adrian for support.

“See. Grace is natural.” Rocky teases a bit, chittering in my direction.

One pebble climbs up the front of my shirt, surprisingly quickly. It grabs at my collar and hoists itself on my shoulder, two arms grabbing my neck for support. I gasp slightly and the tickly feeling and hold as still as possible, my body going ridged.

“A-ah wahait! That tihickles!” I fight every bone in my body to not scrunch up my shoulders but my hands to fly up to grab at the air around my neck. I realize the other little ones go still. I carefully glance down and they are all sitting, like they are waiting. Then I suddenly feel the claws at my neck slowly trace and squeeze experimentally and I jump.

“Noho dohont doho thahat!” I giggle softly and a symphony of chirps and trills follow my laughter as the pebbles start moving again with vigor. They all start trying to climb up my shirt now.

Fudge.

“Adrain think they like Grace laugh.” Adrain chuckles out, still softly rubbing at my scalp. Little legs claw at my stomach as they try to reach the baby perched on my shoulder that is still clawing at my neck.

“AH—guys wahait!”

I squirm helplessly, unsure of what to even do with my hands. Instinctively I curl forward trying to protect my stomach while I laugh which is a huge mistake.

My shirt rides up in the process and the pebbles immediately notice the new exposed skin. Apparently they decide this is a much better route to my neck than climbing over my arms. Tiny claws hook into the fabric before several scuttle below.

“NANOHO NOhohot underNEHEATH—!”

I slowly slide down Adrian’s carapace, forcing my arms up and out. I don’t want to hurt them but I don’t know what else to do. They go still again for a moment and suddenly they're digging into the pudge on my stomach with purpose now, trying to force out loud laughter from me. I squeal as I feel Adrian let out a laugh against me.

“H-Hehelp meheHEHE ADRIAHAHAN! ROHOCKY!” I yelp, my arms slowly lowering back to my stomach against my will. I can’t help it, it’s their little legs, the way they vibrate with sound and excitement against my skin tickles more than I can handle.

“Adrain help Grace.” I silently thank them but I don’t hear Adrian or Rocky tell them to stop or even any action to grab at the little guys. Then I feel a large claw scoop up my hands and stretch me up and out against my will with my back half on the ground and half leaving against Adrian. The pebbles slow a bit at my sudden movement, balancing themselves.

“Adriahan w-whahat are yohou dohOHOING—NO WAhahAIT!” I hear happy trills from under my shirt as they dig in more. Some pinch, some claw, some vibrate, all experimenting to see what can bring the best noises from me. A few have travelled up towards my ribs, feelings round the bones with their legs while other push into my hip making me arch up with a squeak.

“Adrain make sure Grace not hurt pebbles on accident. Still let pebbles play and experience Grace.” The playful trill in their voice tells me I’m doomed. I tug helplessly against their grip but Adrian doesn’t budge.

I turn my head towards Rocky in a last desperate plea for mercy only to find him sitting comfortably beside us, cooing at my distress.

I feel my face burn bright red.

I squeeze my eyes shut trying to block out any tickly feelings. One pebble makes its way up to my collar and carefully starts tracing my clavicle making my chin shoot down to my chest with a squeak. I fidget at the new sensation as the other pebble still stationed on my shoulder traces the shell of my ear.

“This is human version of tickle.” I hear Rocky explain over my cackles. “Hunan touch sensitive. Have common ‘tickle spot’ but Grace very sensitive human. Tickle spot everywhere.” I feel the tips of my ears go red at Rocky’s very helpful commentary.

I’m about to say something dumb probably when a certain curious baby decides to explore my belly button. I shoot up as straight as I can, feeling a small claw reach in and scratch at sensitive skin hiding there.

“AHAHA—NAHOHOHO *SNRK* NAHAHAT THEHEHEHEREAHAH—!” I screech out and flail hard.

I’m actually worried the noise that ripped from my throat would scare the little pebbles but it only seemed to make them more determined. The other three little Eridians on my stomach and ribs immediately went to investigate this new very sensitive spot.

I kick my feet as I feel twenty little arms claw and trace at my bellybutton, making tears quickly well up in my eyes. I buck my hips up, I can’t help it anymore. My erratic movements do nothing to stop them.

“PEHEHEBBLES *SNRK* P-PLEHEHASE!” I beg, kinda forgetting they can’t understand me anyway. They trace around the sensitive spot, reaching in a poking making me laugh hard, my face hurts from the smile.

I squeal, “ROHOHCKYEHE PLEAHAHASE! ADRIAHAHANONO—!” I feel my body get increasingly more exhausted, my arms going slack against Adrian as I slump down, hunching into myself, shaking my head softly.

“Okay. Enough.” I hear Adrian say rather firmly. The pebbles slow their torment to a stop but don’t move off of me. There are little movements to balance and hang on, still making me squirm with giggles.

“Give Grace room.” Rocky adds, getting up to pluck a few pebbles off of me while the other skitter off.

“Heheha thahank yohouhehe.” I wheeze, my eyes closing in relief.

Once they're all off Adrian finally lets go of my arms and I immediately pull them close, sliding all the way to the floor. I rub at the skin of my tummy, trying to get the tingles out of my skin.

As I huff to get my breath back, the baby’s crawl up and watch closely around my head. I feel a small movement and I jump. But then I feel more and more. The pebbles start petting me, mimicking what Adrian was doing earlier. Not sure if they're doing it to be soothing on purpose or if they're just curious about what hair is but I don’t care. They let out purring and cooing noises as the continue. Little claws scratch at my scalp making me melt a bit under the touch, relaxing my tense muscles.

“Told Grace. Pebbles love you.” Adrian shifts closer to me, pulling my shirt back over my stomach and fixing my glasses, pushing them up the bridge of my nose. They take a digit and carefully wipe at the tears on my cheeks making me giggle and scrunch up softly, pushed at their arm.

I sigh, “Well they could at least express it in a different way.” A smirk makes its way to my face as a pebble climbs on my forehead, feeling my eyebrows then reaching under my glasses to graze the tear soaked eyelashes of my one eye.

Anxiously Rocky trills “Careful! Human eyes very important and delicate!” I see him shift to quickly grab at the baby but I hold my arm up.

There is no way to know if all my work paid off, and that fact has lost me countless nights of sleep.

There is no way for me to know that those Beatles made it back to Earth intact, that the taumoebas survived the journey, let alone reentry, or that Earth wasn’t already empty by the time they got back.

It’s a possibility that I had convinced myself I needed to accept. Something I knew even Stratt considered a likely outcome. Utter failure.

Why else would she name the mission “Hail Mary”?

But I am terrified. I risked my life to make sure my planet had a fighting chance at survival.

What if it was all for nothing…

I gripped my arms tightly, nails digging into the skin, with something slick beneath my curled, clawed fingers I couldn’t see in the dark on my right arm.

Every drumming beat of my heart felt like rhythmic punches to my chest, making me wheeze and gasp.

Breathing was merely a motor function - not purposeful or productive. A machine instinct to keep air in my lungs, though no matter how hard my body pushed, hardly anything made it in.

Dizziness.

My extremities tingled as the blood in my body collected around my vitals, leaving my arms and legs feeling cold, heavy, and numb.

I know I have to breathe, but it hurts. Every breath feels like I’ve just come up from underwater.

I deserve nothing more.

“Everyone’s gone…”

I mutter to myself. My voice, if you could even call it that, was no more than a whining squeak.

“Everyone. Eva’s gone… Dimitri’s gone… Carl, your students- they’re gone. They’re doomed to freeze a-and starve, and die and it’s my fault. It’s my fault! it’s my fault-!”

My voice cracks, the harshest words I’ve ever spoken to myself are nothing but a whimper.

“I’m a coward. A coward. I wouldn’t have done ANY of this if Eva hadn’t forced me. What the hell makes me so special? What makes ME with being the lone survivor of the ice age I didn’t even want to help prevent…”

My grip tightens on my arms, a stinging, staticky pain on my right flared in rapid pulses, but I ignore it still.

“I’m not a hero…” I begin to cry. “I’m not a hero… I’m not a hero… I hope they don’t think I am…”

I hang my head, glasses tumbling off my face. Heavy, heaving sobs lurch from my chest as I sit in the tiny, dark bathroom.

It’s cold, it’s pitch black, and I couldn’t convince myself I deserved anything more at the time. My punishment. Death would be too merciful.

My body shakes, but not from the cold.

Breathing becomes difficult, shallow and erratic.

“Grace!”

There’s a voice… I can’t bring myself to look up.

“Grace!”

“Get away from me.” I wheeze, head still hung, knees to my chest.

“Are you- Grace what’s going on?”

I don’t reply, hoping he’ll leave.

“Ryland Grace, can you hear me?”

“Go AWAY.”

“No, look at me.” The voice is insistent.

I only sob in reply.

“Grace, it’s me, it’s Simon. What’s happening? Can you please look up at me?”

“NoooOOO! LEAVE ME ALONE!” I cry out, pressing my back to the wall as hard as I can.

I hear soft footsteps approach me, slowly, like you would a scared animal.

“Grace, you’re scaring me…”

“Simon… go away…”

“No! Stop telling me to leave, I’m not moving! You think I’m leaving you alone like this? You’re out of your fuckin’ mind! I could hear you crying from the observation deck!” I pick up the irritation in his voice, but he was making an effort not to shout at me.

I shake my head slowly, sniffling and breathing heavy.

There’s a quiet click as Simon turns on the bathroom light, casting the room in a dim, whiteish orange glow.

“Oh Jesus- fuck, Ryland!” Simon hisses, taking a shaky breath, before dropping down in front of me.

“You’re bleeding. Shit- damnit, Gracie, you’re bleeding, where is that coming from?!”

It sounds like there’s a lump in Simon’s throat. Oh- he’s afraid of blood…

I shoot up, staring at him with wide, puffy eyes.

“I-I’m sorry-! I didn’t know! I- I can’t feel…” my words are breathy and quiet, but urgent. “I— I’ll take care of it, go- go back upstairs!”

“NO. Give me your hands.” Simon demands.

He sits on the floor in front of me, extending both hands out to me.

“Now, Ryland, I’m serious.”

I hesitate for a long time, and Simon waits patiently.

Finally, I weakly put both my hands in Simon’s, and he pulls my arms out straight.

“There it is- Gracie, you’ve picked straight through Rocky’s paw print scar on your arm.”

The source was hard to see through blurred vision, but my forearm was painted red, along with the opposite hand’s fingers, and some of my, thankfully, red shirt.

“I- I didn’t… I didn’t realize…”

“I know, you do this when you’re anxious, you pick, and you pick, and you pick. Never like this though.” Simon sighs.

He looks around for a moment, I say nothing.

Quickly, he yanks a wad of toilet paper from the wall, and slips the headband he’s wearing off his head, fashioning a crude gauze and bandage around my arm, trying his best not to focus on the blood.

I wince as he pulls the knot tight.

“I know. I’m sorry. It’s not severe, but I have to make sure the bandage stays secure.”

“Y-your headband…”

“It can be washed. We have peroxide.”

Simon finishes his work, sighing as he releases my arm.

“I’m so sorry…”

“Why are you apologizing?”

“I’m sorry…”

“Grace, stop.”

My voice begins to shake, and I can feel another wave of guilt, sending me to tears. Now I’ve involved Simon. I’ve worried him, scared him…

I shake my head, trying to will the words out that are stuck in the back of my throat, but all that comes out is a dry heave, and a sputtered sob.

Simon sighs, bringing himself closer to me. He waits a moment, before gently taking me by the shoulders, and pulling me into him.

I don’t protest, falling into Simon’s chest, arms wrapped tight around him, clutching his sweatshirt as though it were the only thing between me and oblivion, which for all I know could be true.

“It’s alright, you’re alright. You’re alive, you’re safe, and I’m here. You’re not alone.” Simon begins to rock from side to side, gently tracing a hand up and down my back as he tries to put me at ease.

I shake my head against Simon’s chest. “No… no… nonono…”

“No what, Gracie? Use your words.”

“Nonono, no! What if I messed it all up?!”

“Messed what up?”

“You haven’t messed anything up… and if you have, I’m sure we can fix it.”

“You don’t… know that. How do you k ow I’ve done everything right?”

Simon pulls back, looking down at me, brows furrowed in confusion. “What’re you talking about?”

“I- I went through the motions- I did what I had to…”

“Okay… for what?”

“But how could you possibly know it was all correct? W-what if something happened?! What if I did something wrong?!” I sob, almost pleading with Simon.

“What if I did something wrong with the probes- o-or the breeder tanks, and because of me, everyone is gonna die?!”

“Hey, hey-“

“What if it’s my fault humanity is gone?! Wh- what if I’m a murderer…? They said I’d be remembered as a hero, but that’s not- that’s not true!”

“Grace-!”

“I’M A MURDERER, SIMON. EVERYONE COULD BE GONE AND IT’S MY FAULT.” I shout, my entire body tensing as I use every ounce of strength to scream.”

“No., that isn’t true”

“I’m a murdererrRRR. Why should I get to survive when everyone else is on the green mile?!WHY AM I STILL HERE?!”

“HEY. Do not say that. That’s a horrible thing to say. You deserve to be here, and you’re not gonna say otherwise. I don’t fuckin like hearing you talk like that.”

“People have been condemned for far less…” I mutter.

“Enough. That’s enough, Gracie. You’re getting in your own head.” Simon gives me a sharp squeeze, bringing me back to focus.

“Listen to me. You have gone places, done things, experiences and survived things that no human ever has.” His voice is soft and quiet.

“Impossible odds, even more impossible decisions, and here you are, still alive, and still well. That counts for something. That means something.”

Simon brings a hand to my hair, brushing through it lazily.

“And neither of us are naive, or idiots. We know there’s always a nonzero chance of something happening, but what matters is that you have done everything and more in your power to make sure your planet survives. And that’s all anyone can reasonably ask of you. No one is gonna blame you personally on the off chance something goes wrong. You’ve done your part.”

I say nothing in reply.

“And don’t give me the bullshit of “I’m not a hero”, either. You realize you’re the lone savior of Earth, Erid, and me, right?”

Simon pushes me back just far enough to get a look at my face.

“Why else would I call you my angel, if not for the fact that you saved my life? You nearly crashed your ship taking a chance on a distress signal from a moon you didn’t even have charted on your system, all to potentially help something in need. and you brought me aboard, showed me patience through my distrust and anger, care for my injuries, and compassion towards my past, my mutations, and every bit of baggage I dragged in with me. You saved my life. If nothing else, then selfishly, you’re my hero.”

I let out a whining sob, collapsing back into Simon. He tightens his hold on me, resting his chin on the top of my head.

“I owe you my life, and I’ll spend every minute of the rest of it making sure you know just how much you’ve done and sacrificed for me, and the two planets you and Rocky saved.” I can feel the vibration of his words through my skull, and I nod slowly.

“Can you sit up and look at me, Angel?” Simon asks, coaxing me up again.

Reluctantly, I sit up, wiping my eyes with the back of my hand, and looking up at Simon.

“You are humanity’s, Erid’s and my hero, Ryland Grace.”

I take a breath, still a little shaky, but nothing like before. I shift to sit on my knees in front of Simon, and pull him into a hug, arms wrapped tight around his neck. He doesn’t miss a beat, returning the hug with equal strength, the both of us holding each other as if we’d never see one another again.

“Thank you, Simon- I- I’m… I’m so happy I found you.”

He chuckles softly, nodding against my shoulder.

“I’m glad you found me too, I would t be here if-“

“I love you.”

The words are put before I even know it. Silence follows.

“I- I’m sorry, I don’t mean-“

Simon shakes his head.

“No, no. It’s alright… I love you too.” He chuckles, squeezing me tighter. He pulls back slightly, tipping my head down, and planting a quick kiss on the top of it. “I love you more than you know.”

The words aren’t as heavy and burdening as they’ve felt for me in the past. There was something different about how Simon said it.

The moment I loosen my grip, Simon Dows the same.

I sit up, my cheeks a bit red. I take a deep breath, sitting back against the wall.

“Do you feel better?”

“I think so.”

“You think so? Or you know so.”

“I’m… retry sure so.” I sniffle, shrugging.

“I’ll accept that answer.” Simon nods, sitting crisscross in front of me.

“What brought this on? Bad dream? Did you see something?”

“I dunno. I couldn’t sleep all night, and my mind just…”

“Started wandering.”

“Yeah.”

“So you’ve been up all night, then? That’s why you look so exhausted.”

I nod, thumbing the bandage on my arm with the opposite hand. Yeah…”

“Why didn’t you come up to the observation deck? I could have kept you company.”

“I- I didn’t want to wake you- I know you have trouble sleeping too…”

“Ohhh bullshit, you know you don’t have to worry about that.” He rolls his eyes.

“I know, but-“

“Anything my Saving Grace needs is within reach, if I can help it.” Simon says dramatically.

“Come on- don’t call me that.”

“I am ever at your service.”

“Ugh, stop that!” I scrunch my nose at Simon, cringing at the display, unable to help bit smile.

“Oh! Look at that, we got a smile!” Simon teases, flicking me on the nose.

“Simon!” I shove his hand away

“Fine, Fine, but I mean it, if you feel your mind starting t wander, please come find me. I’ve always got time.”

“I appreciate it. S-same to you, of course.” I try not to make it sound like an afterthought. It isn’t, it’s just hard to articulate at the moment.

Simon gives me a smile, before standing up with a groan. “C’mon. Grab your pillow and quilt.”

He nods towards the door of the tiny bathroom.

“What? Why?”

“You’re sleeping over at mine tonight.” He crosses his arms.

“In the observation deck?”

“Yeah, I cannot in good conscience leave you alone down here tonight, so you’re coming upstairs. Rocky’s sleeping up by the deck tonight too. He finally trusts me enough to sleep by me. I’ll be all of us.” He smiles.

I remain on the floor, staring up at him, trying to hide the smile on my face.

“You’re excited, I cannot see you smiling.”

“Whatever.”

“I’ve got eyes, Gracie- not good ones, but I can still see. Here, I’ll take up your stuff, you clean up, change into something that’s not covered in blood, sweat and tears, and meet me upstairs, ok?”

I look down at my shirt, sighing. It was in pretty rough shape.

“Alright.”

Simon nods.

“I’ll see you in a bit, then.”” Simon says, before rather discreetly taking the clippers from the shelf above the sink, and pocketing them as he leaves the bathroom.

I sigh. I know why he took them, and part of me hates myself for making him distrust me. The rest of me appreciates the concern.

-

I find a pair of shorts, like basketball shorts, but softer, and a sweatshirt that I rarely wore - black, with the NASA ‘worm’ style logo branded on the front in stark white. I roll the sleeves up over my forearms, deciding this was good enough as anything.

-

I ascended the ladder, crawling out of the dormitory. The observation deck was straight down the long hallway, and I could see the light of the stars from where I stood.

Since we converted the observation window to Simon’s “room”, it had taken on a life of its own. Rocky built a suspended platform for his mattress, with room on either side for personal items, like books from around the ship, rolled up charts, and notebooks. The rounded walls held a few shelves with more books, a small box Rocky built to hold Simon’s amulet if he ever took it off for any reason, and a crudely made origami plant that I made for him a few months back. He even kept it under a UV grow light.

I approach the platform, stepping up, and plopping down beside Simon. He had my quilt and pillow laid on the opposite side of the bed from where he typically sleeps.

“Looks a Lot more comfortable.” He gestures to my sweater.

“Yeah, it is.”

“I don’t think I’ve seen that one before.”

“I don’t wear it a whole lot- I’m still getting over the uh- the whole ‘wearing merch for the company that sent me out to die’ thing.” I shrug.

Simon chuckles. “That’s fair, I definitely wouldn’t wear a COI t-shirt.” We both snicker.

“Oh- you changed your bandages too.” Simon points down to my arm.

“Yeah, I had Armando wrap it up really quick. Linda tight, but that’s alright.” I lift my arm, looking down at the cleanly wrapped gauze. “Oh, and I promise, I promise I’ll wash your headband for you- I already hit it with some hydrogen peroxide.”

“Don’t sweat it, I’ll be fine.” Simon shakes his head.

I sigh, lying back on the bed.

…

“Can I ask you something?l Simon looks down at me, his voice sounding heavier than it had a moment ago.

“Sure.”

He takes a moment, arranging his sentence in his brain like scrabble tiles.

“You don’t… uhm… are you- okay?”

“Am I… okay?”

“I mean- I know you were in a tough spot earlier, but you were saying some really concerning things, Ryland…”

“No, no, Simon really, I’m alright. It was the panic talking.”

“That doesn’t just come from nowhere, though. I understand what you mean, but you don’t just say you don’t think you deserve to be here without having that idea cross your mind in the past.”

I’m quiet for a while. He’s absolutely right.

“I promise, it’s not something that I consider as often as it… probably seems… which is probably why it makes me panic- it scares me too- but I swear, I’m alright.”

“Please, utilize me. We’re the only humans around for lightyears - we’ll lose it if we don’t communicate. So please please tallk to me, and bring things like this up to me in the moment so I can help.”

“I will, I promise. I’m sorry.” I sit up on my elbows as I speak.

“I hope you mean it…”

…

“Thank you, by the way.” I say

“Hm?”

“For keeping me company- and making me feel like I’m not Earth’s biggest failure.”

“Anytime. I’m glad I got to you in time.”

I hum in reply. Im glad too.

A moment of silence passes.

“Oh- I have something for you.”

I turn my to face Simon.

“I was gonna wait to give it to you, but this is as good a time as any…”

He turns to the shelf on the wall, grabbing a roughly wrapped object, concealed in notebook paper with “Grace” written in marker on it. It was taped together hastily, like he was fighting with the dispenser in the process.

I chuckle, sitting up and taking the parcel from him, turning it over in my hand. It was about as big as my palm, and relatively light.

“I know, I’m terrible at wrapping things up, but…”

“N-Noho! No, it’s great, Si!” I chuckled, tugging at the twisted tape.

After a bit of struggle I get the thing open, and a thin, dark metal chain slides free onto the quilt beside me. I pick it up, letting it dangle in my hand.

It was a… a pendant… it looked quite similar to Simon’s amulet, a round frame with a clear center. Something was suspended in the clear, glassy center - small, ivory, sharp and curved.

“Wow- this is awesome! What is that? In the center?”

“Don’t freak out.”

“…okay..?”

“It’s a tooth.”

I gasp, staring at Simon for a moment before shouting.

“Simon!! This is your tooth?!”

“No! No, dummy it’s not my tooth, calm down. It’s a tooth that got stuck to my clothes before you rescued me - a fragment of one from the creature in the ocean. I cleaned it, and had Rocky make a pendant to keep it in.”

I sigh. “My god, lead with that.”

“Not as funny that way.”

I roll my eyes. “Whatever… this is really cool though, thank you.”

“Now you can wear a reminder of what you saved me from. Now you have no reason to doubt that you’re a hero.”

I’m silent for a long while, clutching the pendant in my hand, staring down at it, before a few tears roll down my face, dropping down into my hand.

“Oh shit, goddamnit, are you alright?!”

Simon puts a hand on my shoulder, concern in his voice all over Gaian.”

“I- I’m okay, I’m okay… sorry, just kinda emotional at the moment. I love it. I’ll never take it off.

“Good, good- I don’t think I can take another scare tonight. Here, give it here.”

Simon extends a hand, and I drop the pendant into it. He moves behind me, lowering the charm over my head and onto my chest, fastening the clasp behind me with a bit of struggle.

I shudder, letting out a stray huff of laughter as his knuckles brush against me.

“Laughing at a man struggling with a prosthetic?”

“Nohoho! No, I’m just- tahahake your time.” I say.

“You’d like that.” Simon mutters, scritching my neck with one finger, making my shoulders shoot up.

“Sihihimon!”

Sorry, sorry. I’ll stop.”

I look down at the necklace. “I don’t- I don’t mind…. You don’t… have to…” I mutter, as Simon moves back over beside me.

“You want me to?”

“W- well I mean…”

I can feel him smiling at me. I continue looking straight ahead.

“Would that make you feel better? If I ticke you? That’s what you’re dancing around asking?” He tilts his head.

“Maybe, I guess…”

“Maybe you guess?”

“C’mon, please don’t make me spell it out, it’s been a long night.” I huff.

“I won’t, I won’t. Just wanna make sure it’s what you want.”

“Yes.”

“Ok, I’ll go easy on you.”

I look over at Simon with an honestly pretty pathetic look.

“You don’t want me to go easy? Angel, I- I don’t want to overwhelm your system- you’ve only just come down from a panic attack, is laughing like a maniac really safe after crying so hard?”

He does raise a valid point, but I can’t find it in myself to care. I needed the pick-me-up.

Simon sighs after I greet him with the same expression..

“Fine, I’ll work up to it. Start slow.” He relents. “Are you gonna come to me, or am o gonna have for grab you myself.”

I smile at him, not moving an inch.

Right… fine, I’ll bite.” He shrugs, lurching at me, grabbing me by the shoulders, and pulling me down onto the quilt.

“Please let me know if you need a break.” Simon says rather sternly as he sidles up to me.

“I will. I’m okay.” I smile.

He nods. Two, uncharacteristically gentle hands find their place against my torso, lightly squeezing and kneading my stomach.

I snort,quietly giggling. “Sihihimon, you don’t have to treat me like I’m made of glahahass!”

“I know that, I’m just being careful.”

“I- I tohoOLD YOu, I’m okay. You’re nohohot gonna hurt me I’m a grown man.”

“Hmoh.”

“What’s thahat supposed to mean?!”

“Nothing.” He pokes me in the navel.

“AaAAH-haha-! If anything, it’ll just tire me out and I’ll finally be able to get some sleep.” I shrug, looking over at Simon.

He sighs. “If it’ll help you sleep…” Simon grumbles. He grabs me, dragging mw up into his lap. His metal arm held me up against his chest at an awkward angle, my arms suspended, and unable to drop. My sweatshirt had ridden up to my stomach in the process, which was precisely the target he struck.

“A-AHAHAHA-HAHAHAA!!” I shriek, feeling a strong hand strumming at my stomach like a guitar.

“Y-YOUR HAND IS SOHOHO COLD-!!”

“Low iron.”

“H-HOHOW IS TBAT EVEN POSSIBLE?!” Simon switches to roughly squeezing the center of my stomach, forcing the muscle to flex.

“It’s not, that was a lie. Wow- have you actually been using the fitness equipment?” Simon chuckles, giving my abdominal muscles a few strong pokes.

“A-AH! AHAHA! WHY IS THANAT SURPRISING, JERK?! OHOHOW!”

Simon stops a ruptly. “Whats wrong? Are you okay?!”

“YEHEhehes! Simon, I’m fihihine!”

“Why the hell did you say ‘ow’ then?!”

“I dunno! I just did!” I shrug as best I can in the suspended position I’m stuck in.

“You’re gonna give me a heart attack. Don’t say that unless you’re actually in pain, dumbass.”

“You’re so jumpy!”

“I’m worried about you! God forbid I’m worried!”

“AwwwwWWAAAAHAHAHA-!”

“Shut up!” Simon hisses, digging his knuckles into my ribs, dragging them up and down like a xylophone.

I throw my head back against Simon’s shoulder, cackling probably a bit too close to his ear.

I find myself sliding upward, pushing with my legs, instinctively to move away from Simon’s hand. He grumbles, clearly annoyed with me worming around.

“My god, hold still if you want me to do this!”

Simon takes me under the arms, lifting, and tossing me down into the bed, with enough push to one shoulder to land me on my back.

I land with a muffled thump, looking up at him with a lopsided smile on my face. Simon’s mild annoyance thaws when he looks down at me.

“You tired yet?”

“No, not really.”

He sighs, looking me over.

“The hell is with those socks?”

“What?! What’s wrong with them?!” I shrug.

The Hailart crew stocked my luggage with apparently, very strictly science themed items… shirts, sleepwear, and socks.

There’s no way this was all my wardrobe was back on earth…

This particular pair of socks, I quite liked. They were black, patterned with the line angle formulas of various chemicals. Dopamine, adrenaline, seraronin, and others of the sort.

“Are these constellations? Whats going on?”

“No- they- no they’re not constellations, are you blind?! What constellations look like that?!”

“How would I know?!”

“Oh- haha- r-right.”

“Jerk.”

“They’re skeletal structures of chemicals. They’re diagrams used in chemistry to show the bonds of molecules.”

“Huh…” Simon lifts my right foot up by the ankle. “What’s this one.” He jabs one of the images stitched into the bottom of the sock, and I yelp, jerking my knee back, unable to pry my ankle free.

“AH-! I- I dunno-! I cahahan’t see it!”

“Okay, does this help?” Simon shrugs, tracing a finger along the hexagons and lines of the chemical structure.

“A-ABAHAHA-! SIHIHIIMON-!”

“Do you know it or not? Pay attention.” He huffs, starting over.

Hexagon… two lines protruding from the left, going up left, and down left… GOD this sucks- then a line going up right from the hexagon… Oh!

“ADREHEHENALINE! IT… ITS ADEENALINE.” I shout, grabbing a corner of the quilt and covering my face with it, letting out a gravelly, muffled scream.

“That’s not what it says here. It’s got a bunch of letters and numbers.” Seriously?! The formula?!

Simon retraces the shape again as I struggle to think

“UHUHUJHH- DANGIT!! I- I DUNNOHOHO.”

“Yes you do, Think.”

“UUUURRBHHAHAHAHA OH-! OHOH ITS C- SUB 9, H SUB 13, N O SUB 3.”

“I need the elements, Gracie.” Simon shakes his head, suddenly raking his fingers up and down the bottom of my foot.

“AAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA-! OKAHAHAHAY OKAY ALRIHIHIGHT-! PLEHEHEASE! STOP AND I’LL AMSWER- I CAN’T TAKE IT.” I howl, thrashing around like a fish out of water.

Simon stops immedietly, pulling his hand away. “Alright. Go.” He says.

I take a moment to catch my breath before answering.

“It- it’s (R)-1-(3,4-dihydroxyphenyl)-2-(methylamino)ethanol…”

“…What..?”

“You asked!” I throw my hands up. “NO. Nohoho no more of that, that SUCKED.”

I yanked my leg away from Simon as he searched for another chemical to quiz me on.

“You’re done?”

“Just with that.”

Simon chuckles, patting my bent knee. “Okay, fine.” He says, shuffling up to my side. “One more, the. I think it should be lights out.”

“Deal.” I agree, admittedly feeling a bit groggy already.

Simon smiles with the wickedness of a man with a plan.

“Sit up.”

“Huh?”

“Up, Gracie.” He makes a rising motion with his hand.

I stare at him for a moment, a bit confused, but I do as I’m asked, sitting up with my knees still bent.

Simon opens out his arms, gesturing for a hug.

“What?”

“Would you just come here?” He chuckles. “So inquisitive.”

“I’m a-“

“Scientist, yes, so I’ve been told. Cmon.” He become me close with a rotation of the wrist.

Hesitantly, I move closer, accepting the suspicious hug, wrapping my arms around Simon’s neck as I do before, and he closes his arms around me.

“Perfect.” Simon purrs, before tightening his grip like a boa constrictor, both hands digging into the muscle of my back.

“A-AHAHAHAHA-! WHAHHAT?! WHAT THE HECK?!” I shout with stunned disbelief.

Simon chuckles darkly, the sound reverberating through my head as he began to knead and pinch and scratch, and jab all up and down the expanse of my back.

“AAHAHAHAHA-! AAAAAH-!! PLEHEHEASE THIS IS SO NOT FAIR!!”

“Yes it is, this is all at your request, Angel.”

He drives his knuckles into my low back, at the same time, blowing a sharp raspberry onto my neck. I thrash in his iron- or xenonite grip, until finally, I’ve had enough.

“ALRIIIIHIHIHIGHT ALRIGHT, UNCLE, PINEAPPLE, HAIL MARY, WHATEVER, STOHOHOP!”

And he does.

I fall limp, and Simon keeps me steady against him.

“That was cruel, y’know that?”

“Again, you asked me to do this. You said it’d make you feel better.”

“Uuurrerrghhj…”

Simon snorts, patting me on the back.

He peels me away from him, holding me at a short distance.

“Do you feel better?”

I nod, fatigue weighing heavy on my eyes. “Yeah, yes, thank you.”

“Anytime, Angel.” Simon nods, squeezing my shoulder gently.

He reaches up, combing a hand tgrough my hair, pushing it out of my face. He looks at me softly, not saying a word.

…What happens next can only be explained by a sleep deprivation induced lapse in judgment. I honestly to god don’t know what came over me in the moment, but in the stillness of the silence, I took a breath, and leaned forward…

I kissed Simon.

I… kissed Simon. I did.

And he kissed me back.

I figured- heck, I expected him to push me back, but he didn’t. Sure he was stunned for a second, but once the shock wore off, he slid a hand behind my neck, the metal one down to my back, and he kissed me back.

Not rough, not vicious or messy… equal, comfortable reciprocation.

I’d hardly ever done this before, and hadn’t the slightest clue what I was doing, but pulled back, with a sharp pain in my lip that I’m pretty sure was y standard for the experience.

Right, the teeth.

“Oh, sorry-“ Simon mutters, looking down at the red stain on my lip.

“No no, it’s alright. It’s fine.”

“It’s bleeding.”

“Yeah I can taste it. It stings…” My voice is quieter now. @Y- you’re not… venomous, are you?”

“I dunno, guess we’ll see.”

“What?!” I tense up.

“Joking, Joking. I’m not venomous. My teeth aren’t hollow like snake teeth.” Simon taps one of the long, sharp teeth with his finger.

“You’re sure?”

“Positive.” He smiles.

I nod, looking to the side.

“Gracie.” Simon tilts his head to catch my eye again. “That didn’t have to mean anything you don’t want it to. You’re drained, and your mind is probably still a little scrambled - don’t worry about it, okay?” He says softly.

Admittedly, a part of me is relieved. I’m really not a relationship guy, let alone a kisser, so I couldn’t begin to imagine the implications a spur of the moment kiss would have on any other person.

I sigh. “Thank you, I- I appreciate it. I don’t know where that came from… W-well it’s not that I didn’t- that I don’t want to… kiss you…”

“Oh? Okay-“ Simon chuckles.

“No! But- I don’t- I just-…” Simon puts a hand up, signaling me to shut up, and I do.

“You don’t need to explain yourself. Don’t hurt yourself, you don’t have to explain.”

“Right… sorry…”

Simon lets out a deep quiet laugh, shaking his head.

I yawn, rolling my eyes.

Simon tips my head down, planting a kiss on the top of my head, like he did earlier.

“Why don’t we stick to that for now? No obligation, Nonthreatening.” He smiles.

“Yeah… yeah okay that sounds good…” I murmur, fading in and out where I sat.

Simon points behind me to my rumpled quilt and pillow. “Lay down. You’re gonna pass out sitting up.”

I mutter something even I can’t remember now, and let myself drop back onto the bed, making the supports rattle with the impact. I had been craving this sleep for dozens of hours, and it was finally within reach.

I hear Simon shuffle over to his side of the mattress, enough room between us maybe for Rocky to fit without his hamster ball. The light on the shelf clicks off, and Simon lays back with a groan only a man thirty years his senior should make.

I short.

“Something funny, Grace?”

I giggle like a kid at a sleepover, whispering - “you sound like an old man.”

“You’re older than I am.”

“But I don’t sound like that when I move around.”

Simon sighs, no longer finding me amusing. I can’t blame him.

“Go to sleep.” He grumbles.

I sigh, rolling over, closing the distance between us.

“Seriously?”

“It’s cold…”

“You chose to wear shorts!” He hisses.

“Okay! And so I’m cold!”

“Will this help you go to sleep?”

“…yes.”

Simon sighs, slinging his arm up and over me, yanking me close, my head between his arm and chest.

“Goodnight.” Simon says, grumbling with exhaustion.

“H’night… love you.” I mutter, my body finally falling limp against Simon’s.

“Grace!”

I hear my name from across the house.

I’m in the middle of lesson planning, which is something I had, admittedly, been putting off for wife a while, and needed to knock out.

Maybe if I just stay quiet… he’ll think I’m not home… or asleep…

“Grace!” I hear footsteps approaching the bedroom- crap. I really don’t want to get up… what do I do?!

Play dead. Well- play sleep.

“Grace, I know you can hear me this house isn’t that big- …” Simon’s voice stops in the doorway.

“Very convincing. Yeah, your notorious sleeping position, laying like a mummy with an open laptop next to you. Would you get up?”

“How would you know how I sleep?” I grumble.

“I’m sorry, how many times do I have to come in here, so you’re not by yourself after a bad dream, for me to have a pretty good idea of how you sleep?”

“…You can get away with that because I do the same for you, loser.”

“Correct. Up.”

“Fine! Fine. Worte a Shot.”

“A shot in the dark with a blindfold on. Can you please help me? I don’t need you for that long.”

I sigh, lifting both my legs straight up, and using momentum of dropping them back down to sit myself upright, hands still folded over my chest.

“Jesus… Are you done, Dracula?”

“You’re the one with fangs.”

“Don’t start.”

“…Yes, what do you need?” I ask, begrudgingly standing up.

Simon shakes his head, turning to walk out of the room, and I follow close behind.

“I need to get this planter down in the greenhouse, but it’s a million feet in the air.”

“Rocky built that as an automated lift and lower system, didn’t he? You should be able to lower it from the control panel by the neighboring wall.”

“Yeah well, it’s not working. I got it most of the way down, but it jammed at about seven feet up.” Simon sighs.

“Ohhh Rocky’s gonna be mad…” I snicker. “That aside, isn’t there a stepladder in the greenhouse? Or at least one in my office.” I catch up, walking beside Simon now.

“Adrian’s borrowing them.”

“What could they possibly need with a stepladder…”

“Beats me. Point is, I don’t have one.”

I push open the front door of my house, hooking a left.

Rocky and Adrian were kind enough to build Simon a greenhouse in the biodome, and it was conveniently right around the back of my house.

It was… massive. There was enough room in the thing to plant, grow, and keep a thirty foot tree in the central, geodomed cathedral room, with shelving, lighting, and irrigation running all around the room like a botanical penopticon. 

The ground was mostly moss and clover, a lush green space that Simon often liked to read, dwell, and nap on while I was busy teaching.

He always looked so peaceful curled up in the foliage, with the yellow-green light dappling down from the skylights. Every once in a while, I’d join him.

Around the circumference of the cathedral was a metal path, starting from the wall and stretching inward about five feet, offering sturdy footing for more utilitarian activities.

There were a few offshoot rooms as well, used for storage, lab space, and a small, personal gallery room with a collection of some of Simon’s favorite plants he’s grown in the months we’ve been here.

The space in the very center sat empty, a tiered pedaatal of soil dedicated for Simon’s seedling, should he ever want to plant it. We were still working up the courage to separate the seedling from his amulet, but the option was always there.

Simon pushes the doors of the greenhouse open, the thick, humid air hitting me like a wave as we enter the small foyer leading into the central dome.

“Ah! You’ve planted some stuff around the center plot! Looks good!” I smile, walking over to the newly planted foliage, crouching down to have a better look.

“Anything special about these guys?” I ask, gently taking one of the tiny, hearty leaves between my fingers.

“No, not really. Just some sturdy ground cover. Sedum Angelina, is what it’s called. Adrian brought me some new substrate to try out in here, so I figured these succulents would be a safe start.

I nod, standing up. “Cool! Looks pretty. I like the bright green.”

“Thanks.”

“So what plant is it that you so urgently needed my help retrieving?” I put my hands on my hips.

Simon is already a few yards away from me, staring up at an obviously, very out of place shelf of plants, suspended awkwardly by articulated xenonite arms.

“This. It’s jammed, and that sucks, but more urgently, I need that philodendron up there so I can repot it. Its roots are going bad.”

“Uh huh… which one is the philoso-hedron, exactly?”

“…philodendron, ‘Professor’ Grace, and it’s the one to the right of the center.”

I hum in thought, looking around for anything I could use to step on to reach the plant.

“I’ve already looked. There’s nothing.”

“And so then what am I here for?”

“You’re taller, I thought you could get to it.”

“What?! How tall do you think I am?! Better yet how short are you?!”

“I thought you had better wingspan!”

“My arms aren’t that long. Strong, but not long.”

“Keep telling yourself that.”

“Ok, I’m gonna go home then.” I cross my arms.

“No! Just- help me think of something!”

I throw my arms up. “That’s so vague! I thought you already had a working idea!”

“No, scientist, that’s why I need you!”

I laugh incredulously, looking up at the plant.

It looks back at me.

“I’ll lift you.” I say with a sigh.

“What? No.”

“I’ve done it before.”

“When?”

“How’d you think you got out of your sardine can and into my medbay, Brinestein? I had to haul your butt across the whole ship!”

“Brinestein is so lame.”

“Whatever, you’re getting lifted.” I rolled my eyes, taking a few steps over to Simon.

“No! What?!”

“You want your phyllo-dungeon or not?!”

“Okay! God- I’ll step up on your hands.” Simon relents, groaning.

“Absolutely not. With all the mud and dirt and icky nonsense you track in my house on those boots? No.”

“I’ll take them off.”

“Even worse, actually. Just let me lift you normally! Like a cheerleader or something!” I chuckle, making a move to take Simon by the waist and hoist him upwards.

He flinches, taking a step back.

“What?!” I laugh, throwing my arms out, half in amusement, half in frustration.

“Don’t just come at me like that! Warn me!”

“Okahahay! 3 2 1 let’s go.” I count down quickly, taking Simon by the waist, and attempting to lift, only for him to gasp, and shove me off, a stupid, goofy half-smile on his face.

“Ohhhhhh brother, are we serious?” I rest my hands on my bent knees, letting my head hang.

“How am I supposed to turn it off?!” He barks out at me.

“Shh, don’t yell around the plants, Simon, they’ll think you’re yelling at them.”

Simon snorts rolling his eyes.

“I don’t know, just- flex your stomach or something. Just brace for it.” I shrug. “It’s gonna tickle regardless, but it’ll be over in two seconds.”

Simon nods.

…

“Ok but turn around and face the Philly-ding-dong so you can grab it.”

“Philodendron-!” He hisses, swiveling on his heels to face the suspended shelf.

“That’s what I said!” I chuckle, stepping right behind Simon. “Ok, ready?” I ask, hands at the ready.

“Yeah, just do it.”

“Ok, one… two.. theee!”

I take Simon again by the waist, just below the ribs, and get him about eight inches off the ground before I hear I sputtering snort, and he wriggles, slipping in my hold.

He falls back into my chest, my arms wrapped around his torso to anchor us both to the ground, the both of us giggling like drunken fools.

“Simon Fisher if you don’t pull it together and let me do this, I’ll give you something to laugh at, and that’s a promise.” I punctuate my joking threat with a pat on the chest, before pushing him up off of me.

“How about I lift you up instead, then asshole?!” Simon scoffs. 

“It’s not my Phil-the Dodo!” I laugh out with a dramatic shrug.

“Fine!! Then- at least lift me from here instead!”

Simon gestures under his arms, like that was somehow a smarter idea.

“…You must be joking.”

“…yeah, I don’t know why I even said that…”

“I don’t know why you say a lot of things. Alright, c’mon. Third times a charm.” I clap my hands, the sound echoing through the dome.

Simon sighs. “Okay… Go.”

I nod, taking hold of him again, lifting Simon up, and…

“AH-! Oof-!”

Simon thrashes, this time knocking us completely off balance, both of us tumbling down into the mossy ground. I held Simon tight to my chest as I took the brunt of the fall, sandwiched between plush moss, and Simon’s entire weight.

“You prihihick! You squeezed me that time!”

“Uuurregh- no I didn’t! You moved, and I readjusted so you’d stay stable!”

“Liar!”

“I’m not lying! It’s not my fault you’ve got gills with ten billion nerve endings in them, so the only place TO lift you up from is your waist!”

“IT WAS YOUR ISEA TO PICK ME UP!”

“YOU ASKED FOR MY HELP!! AND I CAN’T BREATHE!”

“YOURE HOLDING ME LIKE A VICE, IDIOT.”

I snort. “Oh yeah.”

Instead of letting Simon up, I tighten my grip around Simon’s torso, and dig one hand of curled fingers into his stomach, kneading the flesh like dough. The other hand slid over to his side, pinching and skittering over the area rapidly.

“AahHAHAHA- A-AAH! GRAHAHACE!”

I snicker, resting my chin on his shoulder as he struggled. “I told you I’d give you something to laugh about, Giggles!”

“GEHET- OHIHOFF!”

“Why?! Im enjoying my weighted blanket!” I made sure every breath ghosted over Simon’s gills.

“A-AHAHAHA- AH-! JEHEHERK!”

“Oh hush, you’re loving it.” I reach up and give his ribs a few jabs, with a rather childish “pbbft!” Sounds accompanying each one.

“IM NOHOHOT- AHAHA! STOP BREATHING ON MY NECK-!”

“Oh so you want me to suffocate? So mean to me.” I sigh through pursed lips, directing the air at the same spot. My hand travels up from Simon’s side, landing under his arm.

“You’re doing NOTHING to free yourself right now- ew! My lord you’re sweaty-“

I retract my hand from under Simon’s arm, wiping it off annoyingly on his chest.

Simon seizes my moment of weakness, thrashing to the side, and freeing himself from my grip

He rolls onto the moss beside me, and we sit up at the same time. He stares at me, I stare back.

He’s gonna chase me…

“Start running.”

“Yessir.” I mutter.

In the blink of an eye, we both tear off, running like bats out of hell. I clamber up to a stable, steady position, trying not to lose my balance as I run.

I don’t have to look behind me to know Simon’s hot on my trail. He’s much faster than me, but I know how to pivot.

I run about half the circumference of the greenhouse’s central dome’s paved path, and with a squeak of my shoes on the ground, I make a dangerously sudden 180, narrowly missing Simon.

“Ha!” I bark out as I continue back the other way.

Simon growls, adjusting from the disorientation. And following me once again.

With the little bit of time o managed to buy myself, I made the decision to turn into the propagation lab just up ahead, ducking in and taking a moment to assess my surroundings.

I find a large, alien-ish palm in the corner, tucked away among the maze of fronds, vines, and leaves in the lab. Perfect.

As quietly as I can, I scurry behind the massive, metal pot, hiding between it and the wall.

I had to admit, this was actually fun! I hadn’t played silly games like this in years…

“Ryyyyland…”

I hate this, I’m scared, and I’m not having fun. Why is his voice so deep?! It’s like he’s talking with a lion’s growl…

I know Simon’s in here with me, but the lights remain off. Awesome.

“You can’t hide from me in my own lab, Rocketman- I know the layout like the back of my hand.”

‘The one you’re missing?’ Is what I want to say, but I’m too scared to speak.

I hear heavy bootsteps navigating the room, the sound of things being shuffled and maneuvered. I move to peek over the pot to get a better look at where exactly Simon is.

Two red and brown eyes meet my gaze, looming over the pot as I peek over.

“Boo.”

I yelp, moving back, only to be brutally reminded that I chose a spot that locked me into an inescapable corner.

“NOOOO! NO NO SIMON! PleEHEHEASE!” I shriek, laughing nervously as Simon slowly steps around to the side of the pot, standing above me.

“Please what? What’re you begging for? I haven’t even done anything.” He lowers himself down, crouching in front of me.

“PleHEHEASE. Simonohon- you don’t have to do this.”

“I wasn’t planing to originally, but you made the Chase-and-find so fun…”

“W-what are you some kinda wild ahahnimal?!”

“Well- I mean… kinda.” He chuckles, tapping his external tooth with a metallic finger.

Oh my god he just might eat me…

Without another second thought, he lunges at me, knocking me back into the wall, and dragging me down to the floor, holding me there by my shoulders.

“OHOHOW-! Too rough! Jeez!” I complain, not bothering to struggle.

“Ohhh I’m sorry.” He says it in a patronizing tone, but he does take a little bit of weight off of me, but that’s about where the compassion ends, unfortunately.

“AaaAAAAAaaAAAAAAAAAHAHAHA-!!”

“My gid, I’m barely doing anything- my ears are gonna bleed.” Simon groans, slipping both hands up my sides, around the back. And up to my shoulder blades, scratching agonizing, slow circles into the muscle there.

“YEHEHES YOU ARE! GEHEHET OFF!!” I cry out, reaching my arms up to weakly push and punch at Simon’s chest. He seems utterly unphased.

“Well thank you for getting those out of the way for me…” Simon gathers both my wrists in this prosthetic hand, the grip tight and unwavering. He lifts them over my head, and against the wall above where I lay, and moves his free hand to the front of me, vibrating clawed fingers into my stomach.

“AAAAAAAHAHAA THIS ISNT FAHAHAIR!! I WASN’T NEARLY THIS ROUGH-!!” I whine, thrashing and bucking my hips.

“Cry about it.” Simon smiles. Deliberately dragging his hand so that one finger catches my navel.

“AAAAAHAHAHA-!! CRAHAHAP-!!” My whole body jerks, my arms pulling against Simon’s grip.

“Woah- that’s new.”

“NoHO IT ISN’T YOU KNOW THAT GEHEHETS ME!”

“Everything gets you. Everything.” Simon rolls his eyes, poking me in the belly button again, making me sputter.

“NOHOHOT TRUE.”

“Oh yea?!”

“YOU DON’T HAVE TO TRY.”

“Well if you’re gonna sit here and lie to my face, yes the fuck I do.”

“LAHAHANGUAGE!”

“Whatever GeekSquad.” He chuckles. “Let’s try… here.

Simon drags his nails along the underside of my upper arm, up the length of my tricep. I snort, turning my head to hide my face in my shoulder.

“Like who else would this work on?”

“A-ahAhaHA-! Th-thERE’s a lotta ner-“

“If you give me a breakdown of every nerve in your body right now, we’re gonna have issues.” Simon squeezes the area just above my elbow, cutting me off.

“Snrk- OKAHAY OKAY-!!”

Simon spends the next minute poking and squeezing me all over, just to prove his point. My hip, the part of my upper chest that nearly meets my arm, my thigh, my knee… and darn it he was right. I laughed at every one. I’m chalking it up to adrenaline…

“OKAHAHAY ALRIGHT I GET IT PLEHEHEASE-!”

I shake my head, glasses long since fogged up.

“I’ll stop if you agree to let me lift YOU to get my plant down off the shelf. Is that a deal?”

I groan. “Still with that stuhuhupid pill-addendum.”

“See now you’ve pissed me off.”

“Whahat?!”

“You know how to say it, assholw, you call everything by its Latin name!”

“Whatever!! It’s clohohose enough!”

“Say it correctly.”

“No! Get away!”

“Say it correctly!”

“No!!”

Simon tuts, hooking a hand behind my shoulder, resting near my neck.

“Still no?”

I freeze. “Sihihimon- Simon. C’mon-“

“3”

“WAHAIT! How do you say it?! I forget!!”

“2…”

“I DONT REMMBER HOW TO SAHAHAY IT!”

“1.”

Simon latches onto the nape of my neck, vibrating his fingertips roughly into the flesh.

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHAHAHA-!!! NOOOHOHONONONO SILON! SIMON PLEHEHEASE!!” I feel my body tense up, my laughter becoming frantic, almost manic.

“Say it correctly for me, agree to my deal, and I’ll stop.” He pinches my neck, and slides his fingers upwards, sending an electric current down my spine.

“S-SHI- A-AHAHAA-!! UHM- UH- I CANT THINK!!”

“Yes you can, you’re great at it.” Simon purrs he momentarily switches to the side of my neck, offering me brief respite to think, only to return to the nape just a few seconds later. I can feel my face reddening as I for some reason hold my breath.

“Breathe, Ryland. You’re gonna knock yourself out.”

I let a breath out with a sputtered exhale through gritted teeth. I probably spat a little, but my eyes were closed. So if I didn’t see it, ir didn’t happen.

“PH-PHILO-DENDRON?!”

“Very good Angel, you’re halfway there.” Simon runs his nails up into my hair, and back down, making me shiver.

“A-AHA-! OKAY, Y-YES OKAHAHAY I’LL GET THE PLANT. ENOHOHOUGH!!”

Simon retracts his hand, and releases my wrists from the wall, and I slump into the ground, gasping for air.

“If you’d stop holding your breath you wouldn’t have to fight for air like this.” Simon chuckles, carding a hand through my hair, pushing it back off my face.

“You’re sweating like a pig…” he groans.

“Yeah, see how it feels?!” I huff out. He chuckles.

“Get offa me.” I hiss.

“What’s the attitude about?”

“You’re Heavy and you’re making me claustrophobic.”

“You’re not claustrophobic.”

“You don’t know my life!”

“You sleep with a weighted blanket. 20 lbs, And you pull it over your head. You aren’t claustrophobic.” I huff dramatically.

“I am when it’s you! Get offa me or I’m not getting your plant down.”

Simon shoots me a look, leaning slightly back down. I put my hands up defensively.

“Hey, what I said back there? I didn’t mean that.” I murmur.

“That’s what I thought.” Simon stands up, bracing himself on the wall as he extends a hand to me. I accept it, and he pulls me up with minimal effort.

“And you’re sure there’s nothing in here at all you can use to get your plant off that shelf.” I sigh, as we leave the lab, and make our way back to the suspended shelf.

“I’ve exhausted all my options, I assure you.”

I look up at the plant.

Stupid plant.

“Fine, let’s go. Let me step up on your hand.”

“Yeah, nice try Space Ranger, you’re going up cheerleader style.”

“Well, actually some cheer routines so use the hand ste-“

“Turn around and shut up.”

“Fine.” I turn around in a few theatrical stomps.

“Ready?”

“Don’t count me down, just go.”

“Alright, aaand- up!”

Simon takes me by my waist, lifting me up easily. I struggle for a moment, fighting the tingling feeling through my torso. I grab Simon’s philodendron, and I’m swiftly lowered back down to the ground.

“God you’re heavy.” Clearly, he’s joking, but I miss the cue

“No I’m not! I’m lighter than you are! You’ve got 7 pounds on me in muscle alone!” I protest.

“It’s a joke, hun.”

My face flares red as I clutch the plant.

“Don’t- you’ve never called- don’t call me that, don’t do that.” I stammer out.

Simon smiles at me. “Is it too warm in here for you?”

“No, shut up. Here. And I did it without flailing around.” I shove the plant into his arms.

It’s dark green, with flecks of pink all over the leaves. Honestly it’s quite pretty.

I’m sorry for calling you stupid, pretty plant.

Simon takes it. Examining it closely. He tips it to look at the roots through the clear planter.

“You’re gonna hate me.”

“…”

“This isn’t the philodendron I needed to repot. Its roots are fine.” He looks up and down the tall wall of greenery, spotting a similar plant a few feet to the right, and significantly lower, with obviously yellowed roots.

“…that’s the one I needed.” He snorts, dropping his face into his hand.

After we’d reached Erid, there had been a few years of me living in the Hail Mary at the top of the space elevator. While Rocky went down to Erid to sort out bureaucratic things and the Eridians worked on synthesizing food and a biodome for me, I stayed with Armando and tried not to die.

It wasn’t easy. I had been subsisting on Taumoeba and coma slurry (and eventually just Taumoeba when the coma slurry ran out). I had every sickness imaginable (scurvy, anemia, beri beri, you name it). And I dropped at least 40 lbs. Maybe even 50 or 60. I stopped measuring after a while—too demoralizing.

About a year ago, they finished building my biodome and I’d moved in. They also had created food for me that provided all of the necessary nutrients. For a while it was just like the coma slurry, which they adapted a few flavors of to make it taste better. But about 8 months ago they figured out meburgers. Pretty awesome stuff.

I’ve been steadily gaining back my weight and my strength, and I’m no longer sick with everything anymore. But Rocky has been concerned about my weight gain—I can tell. Which brings me to the point: he’s not subtle at all.

On the Hail Mary, Rocky had built a xenonite skin-tight suit out of the last dregs of his xenonite supply. Once he did that, it wasn’t long before he discovered how ticklish I am. I’d explained to him what tickling is and it became part of our routine. He’d tickle me every few weeks or so to get me to admit something, to get me to go to sleep, to mess with me, to get me to stop annoying him…the list goes on. I even figured out how to tickle Eridians (rougher scrubbing on sensitive spots like joints, vents, etc. if you’ve got an Eridian of your own to torment), leading to some pretty epic tickle fights to pass the time. It stopped as I got weaker as we approached Erid, but he’d still tickle me gently when I was struggling to sleep. However frequently he used to do it, it’s nothing compared to the way he does it now.

Now it’s like every week. Actually, it’s exactly once a week. On the same day of the week. At the same time. So, not subtle. Only issue is, I still haven’t figured out why he’s doing it. 

I’ve got a hypothesis though.

Recently he’s been nagging me to weigh myself. I haven’t done that since the early days on our journey when I’d first switched to Taumoeba after running out of coma slurry. At the time I’d been worried about my nutrition, before I realized it was hopeless and I was going for surviving, not thriving. I keep saying no because it’s complicated in the biodome—weird simulated gravity and the lack of a proper scale. And also I’m a little scared to see the number—I can definitely see and feel how much my body has changed, progress aside. 

So he’s been checking up on me in other ways. Weekly “appointments” to assess my weight gain by ti—

I stop typing mid-sentence as Rocky knocks (bangs) on my door. I get up, pausing to steady myself as a wave of dizziness hits me, and go to open the door. 

“Grace! Took so long to answer door,” Rocky complains. 

“Hey, Rock,” I say. I step aside to let him in, rolling my eyes and closing the door when he chirps at me to do so. 

“Okay, Mom,” I grumble as we settle on the couch. I flick on the TV I’d built from various screens from the Hail Mary. We’ve taken to idly watching Earth TV while hanging out as background noise. I’ve been too tired recently to go for walks. 

“Rude,” Rocky grumbles, poking me in the stomach. I recoil from the poke. Here we go again. I check my watch. Yep, it’s 4pm on a Tuesday. Predictable. 

“Rock,” I grumble. My voice is a bit whiny. 

“Yes, Grace?” Rocky says cheekily, clawing up my ribs. I squirm in place, letting out a few stifled chuckles. I feel him pause for half a second at each rib, feeling it slightly. Yeah, I think my hypothesis is correct. 

“Wh- whahaha- why are you dohohoing this?”

He stops. “Is funny,” he replies. 

I catch my breath. “Nope. You’re not telling me the full truth.”

Rocky does that shifty thing he does when he lies. I wiggle my fingers at him. “Do I need to tickle the answer out of you?” He trills in indignation that the roles are being reversed. 

“Fine. Rocky tickle Grace to check health.”

I hum, satisfied. “What aspects of my health?”

“Feel for… muscle development. And weight gain.”

“Y’know, if you wanna feel me up, you could just ask,” I say. I laugh at how steam hisses from his vents in flustered frustration. Man, fake flirting with Rocky will never get old.

“Stop making joke. Is serious. Rocky worried.” 

I sober up. “Okay, sorry bud. I- I get it. I’m worried about myself too. But… we can just talk about it. You don’t have to sneak around.” 

Rocky taps his claws together. “Grace… Grace lift shirt and show Rocky if improvement?”

I sigh, blushing slightly. Privacy isn’t really a thing anymore. But I still get shy about being asked to strip—especially since my body’s so different from normal, from when I first met Rocky. I know he knows that. I pull my t-shirt off. 

Rocky’s claws trace down my ribs. I try to stay still for him. The bones protrude obviously. His claws make their way to my stomach, and he makes a pleased noise as he feels the development of muscle and fat there. “Grace more than skin and bones now,” Rocky states. 

“Yeah, bud, I’m getting better,” I say, chuckling softly as he prods at my belly button. I flex my abs for him. He makes a surprised noise. I think it’s hard for him to remember sometimes how squishy humans are.

When he’s satisfied I put my shirt back on. He cuddles up to me, tracing his claws through my hair. I let my eyes flutter shut, enjoying the pampering. 

“Grace,” Rocky says, interrupting my slow drift into an afternoon nap. 

“Mm?” I mumble. 

“Rocky still like tickling,” Rocky says, his tone slightly shy. “Can tickle Grace without checking for health, question?”