hey yo tony that's some fresh pepperoni

gay steve

I dont have any good ideas for posts right now

gay steve

pretty good, i’ll try it out!

How the hell are you people so bad with money

Monkey brain not evolved to deal with numbers larger than 5

Grug not accustomed to fiat paper

Me see things and want them. I just have to give them plastic card. Which they’ll give right back so I don’t rlly lose anything

Anyone else the exact opposite, where you won’t buy anything if you have to use your card, but the minute you have cash the gremlin side of your brain goes “It’s free money. No deduction from account numbers, no spend. Free money.” Cuz that’s also a problem. (Note: does not apply to amounts over $50, those still trigger the “bad” event.)

Maybe only cats can become ghost. That’s why ghosts just knock over stuff and make noises at night.

My favorite misunderstanding I’ve had to clear up so far was a Japanese person asking me about the word “fuck”. Because apparently someone had told him if he said “fuck” in America that he might be killed on the spot. Which I think is the funniest lie that I’ve ever heard

damn how brave was he feeling when he asked you that

is it?

also like I love how avengers infinity war was about having AS MANY CHARACTERS AS POSSIBLE and avengers: endgame is just like here’s eight white people

thanos’ snap was as random as an airport’s random security check

“Here’s eight white people” is Scarlett Johansson erasure

The beginning of the twilight movie where it’s the the shot of the mountains in Arizona and then it pans over the top and its the mountains in Washington on the other side? Iconic. Miss Cathy fucking snapped. She didnt have to go that hard. Shit.