im really feeling it

My gf loves playing with my dick in bed because it's "like a little fidget toy"

Normal sized fidget toy

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id be careful now gimmick blog

This site is also full of people who wish they were bullies in high school and are trying to fulfill that fantasy in their twenties

oh, the 2010s. the days on tumblr that felt like they'd last forever. seymour. randy. assorted others.

two men meet in a field. the first man says, “what is your name?” the second man say, “i am called Gamer.” the first man says “what do you do?” the second man says “i protect the galaxy. i defeat bowset. i am the hero with a thousand faces.” the first man says “i can do all that and more.” the secodn man asks “what is your name stranger?” the first man says, “i am called Blogger.”

He hasn't been the same since saying good night. He's since been laying there for hours in the dark, not looking or hearing... Sometimes I hear him shuffle slightly.

Yesterday, I was at dinner with some friends and briefly forgot Harrison Ford’s name, but I was like, “His name is a president and a car,” which is how we got such acceptable alternatives as McKinley Camry, Van Buren Gremlin, Clinton Infinity, and Range Rover Cleveland.

Lincoln Lincoln

look upon my work, ye mighty, and this pear 🍐

Wile E. Coyote, two milliseconds before he lights a match only to reveal he's surrounded by flammable traps he himself has set and the whole website explodes

they should invent a disproportionate emotional response that goes away when you understand it's disproportionate. they should invent a way to logic yourself out of emotions

my "suicidal hermit" lifestyle has been largely detrimental to my emotional wellbeing

Brits live in 3 Sadness Stroll and Americans live in 958571995720&5 Northeast E West