.i fucked the alien

I would take crying and arguing and knowing exactly why someone hates me over being stuck in limbo not knowing why someone’s drifting away I guess

Idk it’s just that. I never had a best friend before her. I hate feeling lonely I wish I hadn’t gotten used to mot feeling like that it feels so much worse to go back to feeling like I’m not anyone’s favorite . Maybe that’s like crazy selfish to say no one owes me that kind of treatment but it’s just really hard to feel like no one in the world would ever rank you first

My best friend is like barely even talking to me anymore and every time I try to schedule time to hang out with her she flakes and every time we hang out one on one she gets tired and leaves and she never wants to call anymore and I just don’t know what happened. I even had a bit of a breaking point and asked her if I did something and she said no and just started makinf it about how awful she feels for ignoring me but never gave a super clear answer on what was up and I just ended up apologizing and telling her I was being weird and not to worry about it. But I thought that conversation might at least push her to reach out a little more or be more aware of how often she talks to me or idk. Just. Anything. But nothings changed. The only thing that really comes to mind is that she was going through a rough patch with her girlfriend and she used to have feelings for me and I know her girlfriend can be kind of jealous so. I don’t know if she’s suddenly uncomfortable with our relationship which would really suck. I don’t want to lose my best friend who I’ve known since I was 12 just because her girlfriend has a bad habit of getting all weird about her friends…. But I don’t even know if that’s it. I just want to know how to fix this and it’s really bothering me that I can’t and every time I try i just run up against another wall. I miss my friend

You will experience so much more improvement in your art of any form if you get your head out of your own ass with being overly self critical and start asking ‘why’. ‘I don’t like this’ okay but why. What don’t you like about it. Why does this look funny or bad or whatever. Similarly ‘I like this’ (if it’s your own or someone else’s work) what specifically do you like about it that you can incorporate going forward. Obviously tutorials and studies are great but the best way to maximize what you get out of looking at both your own and others art is to think hmmm… what do/dont I like here and why do/don’t I like it

I’ve had three sandwiches today and while I went to make the third I said out loud ‘today is my day of sandwich’ and no one else in the room laughed but I’ve been quietly amusing myself with my day of sandwich for several minutes now

I can handle a little bit of Americanisms in fic set in the UK written by a US author and vice versa because you can’t be expected to remember every little detail but on the other hand sometimes it’s like why the fuck is Olruggio suddenly from the tri state area