a liar like all elves and men

why are you as a man keeping your eyes fully open? to see more men?

small town diner waitress voice: Omelas? Oh, oh no, easy mistake, you're in oh - MAY - las right now, with an A. Plenty' people get the name mixed up. Nope, no utopia here, just our small little town. *face gets really grim* We do still.. Okay well we do still have a kid that we... I mean it isn't working but- well- You know. It- It's fine. I'm sure it'll start working soon.

genuinely if it becomes a film making trend to adapt 4chan/reddit posts into movies i think we should ban the moving image

do nuns have pockets

that’s it that’s the whole series

[Image description: A panel from the Death Note manga. L gets off a bench awkwardly, saying, “Want to get some cake?” and Raito thinks, “It’s probably too early to kill him now…”]

A standard porno with the bad acting and music and whatnot but partway through the action the camera pans to a millipede and hunting spider locked in a duel for survival, the sounds of sex fade out and the scene in the background blurs, epic battle music starts to play

unclean = adj. of or pertaining to uncles

what the fuck ever it's not like you guys have found the cup or the scepter yet either

while I am talking to you about something gay and stupid a mosquito lands on my arm and sucks all my blood out in an instant, swelling to the size of a person as my remains flutter cartoonishly down to the ground, and it continues the conversation where I left off in a high pitched approximation of my voice