Call Me E!

He's just a little guy

So, my insurance has been trying to not cover my SNRI because it is new on the market and no generic available yet, so pricey.

I apply for a refill and the request gets locked for review. Again. For the 3rd time.

This time I call and immediately ask to speak to the actual doctor making these clinical decisions. Very politely. Must be a slow day because they allow it.

ME: [Teacher voice] I'm calling in regards to the SNRI you have placed a lock on. Why was this decision made?

DOC: Well, there are dozens of other medications on the market in that tier, and far cheaper for you and [insurer]. We have sent a request to your doctor to consider alternatives.

ME: I am aware of that. So, can you do me a HUGE favor and look up my prescription history really quickly and tell me how many SSRIs and SNRIs were only filled once in 2022 for me, showing they were poorly tolerated?

DOC: It looks like eight.

ME: Great job! Now, can you please look at my genetic test for psychiatric drug tolerance and tell me how many medications are listed in the safe category?

DOC: Two.

ME: Awesome! Now, can you tell me what type that other drug is that I'm not taking?

DOC: Yeah, totally, it's an MAOI.

ME: That's correct, you're really knowledgeable! Should I be taking something as dangerous as an MAOI with my other medications, or even just in general?

DOC: It's contraindicated for sure.

ME: It is! So true! So, last question since you've been incredibly smart and helpful. Is it less expensive for [insurer] to pay out for the medication knowing they already get a huge manufacturer discount anyway, or is it more expensive for them to pay for me to need potentially long-term inpatient psychiatric care?

DOC: I'll clear the code, ma'am and flag it as medically necessary. I'm sorry about this.

ME: I appreciate you SO MUCH. You have a great day now.

Every single person on this planet thinks about dark and taboo things. It's literally the most normal thing in the world.

INTERVIEWER: Have you done therapy? CRONENBERG: No. Never.

I: Have you purposely avoided it? C: No. I just honestly - I felt I didn't need it.

I: You're just all good. C: Yeah, I'm totally cool. No problems. I had no problems to solve. My parents were really sweet, very sensitive, very understanding and supportive. They were lovely. I had a lovely childhood.

I: So you've never stayed up at night being like, "Why do I make movies where people pull each other's organs out of their bodies?" C: No, because I know that as George Bernard Shaw said, "Conflict is the essence of drama." You don't make a movie about nice people who are all nice to each other. That'd be so boring. You might want to live like that. But you don't make a movie like that.

I: I yearn for your placidity. C: Well, the placid nature is genuine.