When you sort the AO3 works and see the following tags, “Everyone lives/Nobody Dies”, “Fix-it” and “Time Travel” in abundance for the first ten pages, my first thought is, “Okay, who hurt you.”

Canon. Canon hurt me.

when i forget to log into ao3 and i have to click proceed to see an adult fic, i actually get a kick out of it. like i am an old timey queen and my bard is apologetic: “gentle lady, dicks doth touch in this next ballad. would you prefer another?” and i give him a gesture of command like, “nay, you may proceed, minstrel. bring forth the tale of dicks”

my life… is a bioware game

explain

disappointing lack of gay romance

Constantly wishing I had better hair.

Eyebrows are a wreck.

Makeup lighting different from original application

things always sound worse spoken than thought of in head

I mean to say something nice but it comes out sarcastic.

I punched a reporter twice

i should go

Glitchy af movement

After Chapter 1 it all went downhill

Doing a dozen other small things instead of the one important thing I’m supposed to be doing

Inventory full of crafting resources I fully intend to make something with but just haven’t got around to it yet.

do you ever read fanfiction so good you wish it was a book that you could buy and put on some shelf in your bedroom and gaze at sometimes and remember how amazing that motherfucker was instead of having to squint at it on your too bright phone screen at 3 am

i love cats. like we as a species just really go out of our way to obtain fat little house goblins in the hopes that they will occasionally acknowledge us

Reblog if you love your fat little house goblin

this morning NASA abandoned their mars rover Opportunity (aka Oppy) because it (she) got hit by a storm on Mars and it knocked her camera and wheels out and her last words to the team were “my battery is low and it is getting cold”. I know she’s a machine but I’m devastated. Oppy is the one who discovered water on Mars. RIP oppy ily space baby

Don’t give me one-sided unrequited love, give me two-sided unwanted love. Both sides are deeply in love with the other and both sides are like ‘fuck, really?? them??? really?’