A devil-possessed poet with patience.

I think if humans layed eggs then our bosses would still make us come into work even after laying eggs... they'd say "get an incubator! you don't need to watch them!" and we would be forced into work every day instead of sitting on our eggs, so tragic! so cruel!!!!!

Its like this

Honestly, Tvyek is pretty miraculous. It’s permeable to water vapor but not to water, it’s nearly impossible to tear, but can be easily cut. It’s cheap and made entirely without binding chemicals. In addition to being used for wristbands, it’s used to wrap construction sites to keep out water during construction, for tear-resistant envelopes at Fed-Ex, coveralls for mechanics, and my wallet, actually.

Whenever I hear someone say "the woke mob" I have to stop myself from laughing because even today all I can think of is this fucking tweet

they updated it

Hey... so... flesh-eating screwworms just made their way back into Texas today...

oh you’re not kidding