Sptr Blzozl the Minecraft Mom

Enriched uranium sword with a lead sheathe that is rumored to slowly kill its owner in exchange for god killing power.

League of knights with similar blades all sheathe their weapons in the mechanisms of a dilapidated castle, their power bringing arcane mechanisms to life and unearthing secrets long buried and lost.

Two selfish combatants duel with these cursed blades, their final mighty clash laying waste to both warriors and their surroundings in an apocalyptic storm of divine fire that sees the land poisoned and cursed by the gods for decades.

The worst part of human adulthood is being your own zookeeper

I want to stuff a pumpkin full of raw meat and roll it around my enclosure, but I also know that I’ll have to be the one to clean up afterwards :-(

Take steps to minimize the mess! Put a cheap, disposable plastic tarp down in the area you'll be rolling it around. And.. Maybe recognize your species-specific needs and cook the meat first

Aliens trying to cure the Clinical Depression of Humans aboard their ships by theorising Earth-Specific enrichment activites...

I feel like it might work tho

Someone photoshop a minecraft water block in

fuck ur zodiac sign what font do you speak in

I’m OBSESSED with how GameFreak accidentally made the most autistic character ever with Red when they were just trying to make him represent as broad a player base of the original games as possible. He’s canonically semi-verbal, and the number of times he actually speaks can be counted on one hand. He’s absurdly skilled at one topic he has an interest in, being a prodigy outranking almost everyone at fourteen. He immediately ran away from what was essentially a public facing job relating to it and hid away from people completely for several years to the point his own mother had no clue how he was. He rarely emotes and only people close to him seem to understand how he’s feeling. He’s almost always depicted as fiddling with the brim of his hat compulsively. He is seen as cool and badass BECAUSE of these traits. Fucking excellent. I love it. Best character ever. GameFreak should bring him back in every game. 

you ever find a piece of clothing and feel like you just stumbled upon an essential bit of your character design

TAHW ruoy

??thgir taht gnidaer I ma ,yrros m'I

?dehsurc gnitteg nolemretaw eht erongi annog tsuj er'ew oS

nolemretaW

TV show that plays up the relationship between lead and her "best friend" with blushes and implications and stolen glances and super baity will-they-or-won't-they moments, then in like the second-to-last episode it's textually established that they've been fucking off camera since before the series began and they're just huge fucking nerds.

her eyes were the sickly green of the sky before a tornado, and to his horror he discovered she could throw cows around just as easily

to his horror? weak shit. outta my way gayboy im boutta get it