You should walk down the street to not be stupid!

“Toxic masculinity is a set of behaviors and ideologies created and perpetuated by men” doesn’t disprove my point that these ideologies are harmful to other men. Nor does it invalidate the idea that some neurodivergent men have trouble learning coping mechanisms, or the idea that some neurodivergent men expressing their problems in a reasonable way to someone can cause a feedback loop of, in my case, “man tells father why he’s upset,” “father belittles man for being upset,” “man gets more upset,” “father makes fun of man for being upset.”

No, the problem is men who can’t figure out how to express these emotions in appropriate ways. “I know you’re having big emotions right now but we can’t hurt others, so let’s find a way to calm down,” is stuff we teach kids in elementary school.

I also don’t throw things or hit people, and I very rarely yell. And the only “appropriate” way I was taught to express emotions is to go cold turkey on having them, which isn’t possible for a human person. And if I try to explain why I’m upset, I’m usually just told I’m in the wrong and need to just shut up, which makes me more upset.

Yes, I too was treated that way. Still am, some times. But I learned that suppressing my emotions is pointless, because you'll have them regardless. Everyone benefits from learning emotional regulation, it's a skill we teach toddlers.

What I was saying about toxic masculinity is that it leads to stigmatization of learning coping mechanisms, to the point that my “lessons” in coping as a toddler began and ended with me being spanked any time I cried. And I haven’t learned on my own because knowing how to deal with being overwhelmed takes more than knowing there’s a problem.

do you think women are rewarded for being emotional? do you think women have never been spanked?

Again, being violent towards people was never part of this particular discussion, only towards inanimate objects.

“Toxic masculinity is a set of behaviors and ideologies created and perpetuated by men” doesn’t disprove my point that these ideologies are harmful to other men. Nor does it invalidate the idea that some neurodivergent men have trouble learning coping mechanisms, or the idea that some neurodivergent men expressing their problems in a reasonable way to someone can cause a feedback loop of, in my case, “man tells father why he’s upset,” “father belittles man for being upset,” “man gets more upset,” “father makes fun of man for being upset.”

No, the problem is men who can’t figure out how to express these emotions in appropriate ways. “I know you’re having big emotions right now but we can’t hurt others, so let’s find a way to calm down,” is stuff we teach kids in elementary school.

I also don’t throw things or hit people, and I very rarely yell. And the only “appropriate” way I was taught to express emotions is to go cold turkey on having them, which isn’t possible for a human person. And if I try to explain why I’m upset, I’m usually just told I’m in the wrong and need to just shut up, which makes me more upset.

Yes, I too was treated that way. Still am, some times. But I learned that suppressing my emotions is pointless, because you'll have them regardless. Everyone benefits from learning emotional regulation, it's a skill we teach toddlers.

What I was saying about toxic masculinity is that it leads to stigmatization of learning coping mechanisms, to the point that my “lessons” in coping as a toddler began and ended with me being spanked any time I cried. And I haven’t learned on my own because knowing how to deal with being overwhelmed takes more than knowing there’s a problem.

“Toxic masculinity is a set of behaviors and ideologies created and perpetuated by men” doesn’t disprove my point that these ideologies are harmful to other men. Nor does it invalidate the idea that some neurodivergent men have trouble learning coping mechanisms, or the idea that some neurodivergent men expressing their problems in a reasonable way to someone can cause a feedback loop of, in my case, “man tells father why he’s upset,” “father belittles man for being upset,” “man gets more upset,” “father makes fun of man for being upset.”

No, the problem is men who can’t figure out how to express these emotions in appropriate ways. “I know you’re having big emotions right now but we can’t hurt others, so let’s find a way to calm down,” is stuff we teach kids in elementary school.

I also don’t throw things or hit people, and I very rarely yell. And the only “appropriate” way I was taught to express emotions is to go cold turkey on having them, which isn’t possible for a human person. And if I try to explain why I’m upset, I’m usually just told I’m in the wrong and need to just shut up, which makes me more upset.

“Toxic masculinity is a set of behaviors and ideologies created and perpetuated by men” doesn’t disprove my point that these ideologies are harmful to other men. Nor does it invalidate the idea that some neurodivergent men have trouble learning coping mechanisms, or the idea that some neurodivergent men expressing their problems in a reasonable way to someone can cause a feedback loop of, in my case, “man tells father why he’s upset,” “father belittles man for being upset,” “man gets more upset,” “father makes fun of man for being upset.”

No, the problem is men who can’t figure out how to express these emotions in appropriate ways. “I know you’re having big emotions right now but we can’t hurt others, so let’s find a way to calm down,” is stuff we teach kids in elementary school.

I also don’t throw things or hit people, and I very rarely yell. And the only “appropriate” way I was taught to express emotions is to go cold turkey on having them, which isn’t possible for a human person. And if I try to explain why I’m upset, I’m usually just told I’m in the wrong and need to just shut up, which makes me more upset.

“Toxic masculinity is a set of behaviors and ideologies created and perpetuated by men” doesn’t disprove my point that these ideologies are harmful to other men. Nor does it invalidate the idea that some neurodivergent men have trouble learning coping mechanisms, or the idea that some neurodivergent men expressing their problems in a reasonable way to someone can cause a feedback loop of, in my case, “man tells father why he’s upset,” “father belittles man for being upset,” “man gets more upset,” “father makes fun of man for being upset.”