this is who i am now i guess

inspired by a post i saw recently about a drama i'm not watching that's getting torn apart by mdl commenters.

kill my sins (8.0): okay yes, an 8 is not bad in the grand scheme of things. and technically i have yet to finish this--i take it in small doses because it's pretty fucking dark in a makes-you-think way, as opposed to a disturbed-but-can't-look-away way. so yeah, it's not going to be popular. but only an 8???? liu shi shi and shawn duo alone are worth at least an 8.2.

a moment but forever (7.9): i ranked this as one of my favorite dramas of 2025. yeah it's an overexposed pastel-colored xianxia but it has so many smart things to say about humanity, divinity, connection, purpose, etc etc etc. and liu xue yi is a force in this, fuck. 7.9, my ass.

fortune writer (7.9): this rating is CRIMINAL! by far the best mini i've ever seen in terms of writing and acting. it's more compelling than a lot of cookie-cutter dramas rated higher. it deserves an 8.5 at least!

love in between (7.8): seven. point. eight. *eye twitches* i'm sure it's the lack of traffic star that keeps this low, plus it's a lot of episodes with some complicated dynamics and a lot of (understandable, justifiable) betrayal amongst the mains. but that doesn't change the fact that this rating is WRONG! so wrong! this is in my top 5 cdramas of all time and i just...the injustice. i can't.

under the moonlight (7.7): another one that probably suffers for lack of household names and international distribution. it only has a handful of mdl reviews and one of them gave it--wait for it--ONE STAR. all because of the ml, who i also did not like in the beginning but eventually fell for harder than the meteor that ended the dinosaurs. so i need everyone with an mdl account to watch this asap and give it the ratings it deserves so we can erase the damage that mdl user rokkan has done.

I don’t think I’ve ever seen a weirder FL than Kang Dan-Sim/ Shin Seo-Ri. She’s like a really fucking strange bird. Not like the ‘bit weird but actually really sexy and cute’. But seriously nuts without any vanity that prevents the batshittery from coming out.

Her dowdy outfits that mix toddler with granny chic. Her rage and her freakouts. Her strange walk. Her stage-y performative laugh. Her (mostly misplaced) smugness. Her egocentrism. Her superstitions.

And that’s how you know it’s real love.

A secretly status-conscious chaebol heir falling for what seems to be an unemployed 24/7 method actor who perpetually shows up as a Joseon royal consort, always tries to close weird nonsensical deals, doesn’t know what a credit card is, who has embarrassed him in public numerous times, and will with 99% likelihood absolutely not be an asset to his business which means meant everything to him?

10/10 adore.

This drama has absolutely zero restraint and I respect it immensely.

Nobody says:

“wow this soup is spicy and refreshing.”

No. We get:

“THE ASPARTIC ACID HARMONIZES WITH THE CHEONGYANG PEPPERS.”

These men are eating cafeteria food like they are judges on a survival cooking anime.

And look at their faces! They are having full religious awakening reactions again. Sung-jae accidentally turned the military mess hall into:

Korean Iron Chef: Barracks Arc.

Also I love that the show has decided every successful meal must trigger:

glowing skin

widened eyes

heavenly enlightenment

group hallucination

emotional rebirth

just 10-ish years ago, there were kdramas that the big 3 korean channels (SBS, MBC, KBS) would broadcast and then there were kdramas that the main cable channels (jTBC and tvN) would broadcast. and between those groupings, you got everything. you got 16-20 episodes of dramas that had heartfelt writing, filmed with bright colors, filmed with concise plots, that most of the time, ended WELL. you got a GOOD ending that was complete. the works felt authentically south korean. yes, there were cheesy tropes and moments that made you cringe, but it felt so real. and you had SO many kdramas airing during the week! you couldn't keep track of just how many!

cut to netflix coming in and making it big with kdramas with squid game and some romantic works and then suddenly they (and disney+) are making these short kdramas, less than 10 episodes, with generic filters, generic plots, and poorly written scripts that are just mere shadows of what kdramas used to be. they end shitty 90% of the time. and worst of all, they feel like american shows. and no, i don't mean sex scenes or action scenes because hey, i love change there, but i mean the entire VIBES are just off. they're not the kdramas i fell in love with, the ones that felt so human. and thanks to these big, foreign companies coming in, the main broadcast channels have basically shut down 1/2 their timeslots, and so many dramas aren't even getting aired these days.

WHAT ABOUT DOOMED SIBLINGS

Even though the man is no longer alive, he still haunts him. He is the reason why Lee Ahn grew up being this stoic, unfeeling creature, barely reacting, only doing the bare minimum and what was required of him as the second son. And despite knowing his brother's will and suspecting members of his family had been murdered, he still did nothing.

It's a tragedy, his whole life. Restraint was the norm for him, and was confined to a box, where he acted a certain way, never to step beyond the boundaries set for him. A life that felt like a cage. So much, in fact, that even after the people who hold him down (i.e. his father and in a different way, his brother by his title) are gone, he still behaves like those "chains" are in place.

And now the Queen Mother fights him at every turn, and even though I'm sure he doesn't want to, he feels bitterness for being relegated to second place, behind his nephew. It has to sting. Especially since he's fulfilling the responsibilities of the King as Regent, but still lacks the title.

The only thing in his life bringing him joy, making him feel alive, is what he feels for Huiju. The only person who has told him "you don't need to live like this, do not bend down to others", and he really thought he had lost her, on the very day of their wedding.