Honestly I think the fact LGBTQ+ culture is a real tangible thing that exists needs to be driven home more.
Like, I mean the academic definition of culture here. A bunch of values, norms, music, fashion, etc. etc. passed down from one generation to the next.
We don't have culture in the same way other groups, but we're still a sociopolitical group of people with a history and common origin. We still pass down our knowledge from one generation to the other, even though we've had attempts to exterminate entire generations of part of our community.
We've taken care of each other and formed found families. We gave our own idea about what family is. We have our own music, our own fashion, our own vocabularly. We have our own gender roles. In LGBTQ+ spaces, stranger becomes acquantaince, even if you only spoke once. We have a different idea of social connection.
These things form who we are. If you're heavily involved in some way with the community, whether activism wise or really into being LGBTQ+, you've likely felt the same feeling I have about the difference between existing in cishet society and LGBTQ+ spaces.
That feeling of being an outsider when your classmates or coworkers are talking about their relationships isn't just because they're cishet and just said something sexist. At least, for me, it isn't.
It's a feeling that these people don't speak the same language as me. They don't come from the same world as me. They don't see music, fashion, relationships, etc. the way I do. There's a tangible cultural disconnect between me and my cishet colleagues.
Because this community is my life. It has been since I was 12 years old. It crosses my mind every day, I think about something related to our culture or academics every day. So many of my friends have shared this culture, and talking to someone who doesn't - I can tell the difference between our view of the world.
And I think this gets lost when it comes to all this discourse. The community isn't some exclusive club. We've been othered by cishet society, and we can't define who belongs and who doesnt the way some of you do. It doesn't work. It's against our reality and lived experiences and history and culture. Your opinions don't change the bigger picture.
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