i would rather see the information for an event handwritten in sharpie on a paper towel than see another AI generated flyer
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@soupsquid
i would rather see the information for an event handwritten in sharpie on a paper towel than see another AI generated flyer

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once you realize you don’t actually need to sleep, you can really (stops talking abruptly and stares straight ahead for 4 minutes)
westley in the princess bride was so funny for being like ‘talk about this dead guy you loved lol’ and getting the tea about himself
oh he was ur true love? you thought he was hot n strong? rate him 1-10 and why
i hope this is the pride month that something lesbian happens to me. preferably something freaky
at this point i’d accept a hand hold. just anything really

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like 2 months ago i saw a single lobster in the grocery store tank that'd somehow lost a rubber band and every other lobster was huddled in the opposite corner of the tank in a big lobster pile (presumably because the freed lobster was an asshole about having a free claw) like. im done with crab in a bucket mentality. You're not even trying to pull everyone else down to get out and climb up yourself, you're just being a dick. Unshackled lobster in a tank mentality
Wish sunflower seeds were the size of my head so I could hold one in both hands and eat it like a little hamster
while jamming my entire body between two closing elevator doors today, i was met with wide eyes, and i thought to myself "this probably looks frightening to people that don't have a thorough technical understanding of how elevators work and the history behind why they are so insanely safe"
and then i remembered the story of the tenured civil engineering professor who, with a running start, would leap and throw himself full-force at skyscraper windows in order to demonstrate their structural properties, until one day the window popped out of the frame, unbroken of course, and he fell to his death
letd go eat parts of that guys car
Msg literally stands for Makes Shit Good so why would you not want it

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It feels like I’ve talked about this before, but to me the funniest version of Portal is if Chell is deaf.
Like, most of the major story beats, at least the ones that directly affect her, have a prominent visual component so she’s following along with the basics. But she has no idea who cave johnson is, or what wheatley was trying to explain to her, and she certainly wasn’t hurt by any of glados’ insults.
but the best part of this headcanon is imagining glados checking chell’s personnel file years down the line, noticing the word “deaf” for the first time, and just going “WHAT???”
Glados learning sign language so Chell can hear at least one of her excellent monologues and Chell just closes her eyes
my cat squaring up to fight the moth on the other side of the window:
my cat when there is an actual bug in the house:
it’s always “I understand why you have an autism diagnosis now” and not “thank you for explaining the entirety of the Chernobyl nuclear disaster to me, I really enjoyed hearing about the Chernobyl nuclear disaster”
Good morning, what the fuck was I cooking in here
I just napped in bed with a ray of sunlight cast upon me. Man, this is cats shit. I get it cats. That's rpretty good.

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why did they brand a handprint on a man in 2008. gay marriage wasn’t even legal in new york yet.
KURT HUMMEL HADN’T EVEN DONE THE SINGLE LADIES DANCE ON GLEE YET
I have succumbed to my wounds
If you even care