I'm sorryitsmyfirstdayonearth, but you can call me "sorry" or "H".
On this blog, I share my writing, my recs for other fics as well as my thoughts on all things fandom (mostly Supernatural)!
Most of what I share on this blog is adult content, so please use your own discretion before reading/interacting.
✲ MY WRITING MASTERLISTS ✲
Here you can find all of my fics! On a list! A masterlist!
✲ WHAT'S ON? ✲
Take a look at my latest updates!
SERIES
↬ Coming 6/11/26: SUN BLEACHED FLIES
Sam x reader x Dean. Childhood friends to lovers, polyamory. Masterlist.
↬ I wish I'd known you in your wilder days
Dean x female reader, age gap, post-series. Masterlist. Finished.
ONE SHOTS
↬ Hand in unloveable hand
Soldier Boy x supe!reader. Takes place in the 60's. Hate sex. Read here.
↬ All dogs go to heaven
Dean x reader in heaven, post-series fix-it. Read here.
↬ Blood Sugar Sex Magik
Sam x witch!reader with blood kink smut. Takes place in season 14. Read here.
✲BLOG NAVIGATION ✲
↬ sorry's recs
Find what I've read and loved.
↬ sorry's wips
Stay up to date on what I'm currently writing on.
↬ sorry's asks
Find the lovely asks you've sent and I've answered.
✲ ASKS & REQUESTS ✲
Asks are open! Come chat to me, share some thoughts, ask me questions or just blab away. ❤️ I do not take requests, as I cannot guarantee that I will fulfill them (read why here), but feel free to share your ideas. I've written fics from shared ideas before, so you never know!
Want just my writing? Follow me at @yayitsmylastdayonearth
☕Want to buy me a coffee?
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality
Anya is LIVE right now
FREE
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
hopping into your inbox with a random question for youuu :D (no pressure ofc <3) i'm sure they would both be wonderful, however in your opinion
who would give the better massage, sam or dean?
(like a nice thorough + soothing one after a long ass day)
Hello my lovely!! ❤️ I love this question, I love a random question, I love the little blue badge next to my inbox*, weeeheeee!! 🥰🥳
So I know that I am extremely Sam-pilled, but I gotta say, to me this is no competition: it's Sam.
I'm sure Dean loves the idea that he gives a good massage, but you cannot tell me that his rough-and-tumble, ADHD ass can focus on anything longer than two minutes. I KNOW he's gonna try to show off how strong he is, until his victim partner is squirming away. He also thinks lotions and oils are gay, so.
Sam on the other hand would be all the way down. You know he's read about it. He warms up his hands first. It's not just foreplay to him though of course it can be. He can hit all the right pressure points with those big ol' hands.
Yeah, I think that sums up what I'm thinking exactly. 😄
*there are plenty more lovely asks/requests/fic ideas in my inbox. I've simply been too busy to work on anything but Sun bleached flies. Now that's ready, though, I'll finally have some time! Thank you all for your patience! ❤️
The concept the fully adult writers of SPN have of women just randomly leaving their full ass bras behind after hook-ups is the spiritual brother of those NASA engineers asking if 100 tampons would be enough for a one week mission.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality
Anya is LIVE right now
FREE
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
No, because that scene in "Lazarus Rising" where Bobby tries to whoop Dean's ass and then they hug real long and close when he realizes it really is him is so "tough ass girlfriend who doesn't trust anybody, we fucked nasty in the kitchen right after this" coded.
Should I write this?
BEST LAID PLANS
“Don’t cry, Caroline. I’m supposed to be the bad guy.”
FORBES, Caroline; SALVATORE, Stefan
Caroline visits Stefan during his imprisonment.
c. S03.e07-08 (missing scene) wc. 1k
cw. ref. to canon-typical violence
She tiptoes down to the cell just before dawn, holding her breath, trying to creep on barely her tiptoes so she won’t be heard. It’s dank in the cellar and what happened to her here is still fresh, pervasive in the gloom. She has every intent of opening the door, of delivering the speech she’s practiced a thousand times in the mirror, but as her fingers brush the lock panic rises up in her throat, her heart starts to race and she bites her lip enough to draw blood, trying to keep herself under control.
She sinks to the floor, her spine coming to rest against the steel. She leans her head back, looking at the ceiling, closing her eyes and listening to the ragged sounds of his breath on the other side. She had wanted so many things form this moment, to accuse him, to save him, to fix him the way he had fixed her because she owes him that much, at least. She sighs at how her best laid plans always seem go astray, because now that she’s here she just can’t. Can’t see him like this, starving as she starved, suffering as she suffered. The lines between them are too real, and she knows that if she looks him in the eye she’ll let him go, because they are the same and she has to believe it’s what he’d have done.
She thinks in the quiet, with only his rasping to pace out time. He was once her salvation, and now he simply breathes and it illustrates her deepest fears: if he can’t be saved, what hope is there for her?
She loses track of how long she’s sat there, leaning up against the steel door, the metal as cool as her skin with neither warming the other. She doesn’t doze, doesn’t dream, doesn’t dare to move. And then he speaks.
“Caroline.”
It chills her and suddenly she feels like ice. She stills herself, stops her breath, tries to even stop her heartbeat. She doesn’t want to be here anymore, but she can’t just run away.
“Caroline.”
Her name is soft, melodic, sweet and low. It’s a loving note that hasn’t flowed through her in forever, but it still resonates to her core. She closes her eyes and draws in a shaky breath, shaking her head, telling herself no, no, no.
“Someone kept you in here. Just like this.”
She can feel herself start to tremble again, her eyes pricking in the way that heralds tears. She wishes, for once, to feel the pressure of the change. Her eyes stained with blood would be less painful than having them salted and drained.
“You can't deny it, you’re all over this place. You and charred flesh. You were hurt here. Burned. Weren’t you?”
It’s a question she can’t answer, but she doesn’t have to. The evidence in locked in there with him, and if the ghosts of her cries have left, her blood still stains the stone floor, her skin is still fused to those chains where the vervain they were treated with burned her. She covers her face with her hands.
“You’re ignoring me. You think I don’t remember, because I don’t care, but I do. I remember. I promised I’d never let anything happen to you.”
It hurts to hear him say it again, hurts to be reminded that his promise meant nothing, that he doesn’t care anymore, that he isn’t on her side. Her forehead drops to her knees and she squeezes her eyes shut because the tears are coming now, a gentle, insistent trickle.
“I would have stopped it. I would have come. Even monsters keep their promises.”
It’s not quite the apology she wants, the apology she’s wanted from everyone that didn’t save her, the apology she never gets. He isn’t sorry, he can’t feel sorry, but it feels like this admission is as close as she’ll ever get, so she accepts it, assimilates it. Believes it.
“I don’t deserve this, Caroline, no more than you did. I can’t change what I am. Nobody can fix me, there’s nothing here to fix.”
She’s crying quietly, holding herself tightly to keep form falling apart. He’s saying all the things she once said, and even if she knows he’s playing her, trying to manipulate his way to freedom, every word rings clear and true within her heart.
He doesn’t ask her to release him, he just speaks, his voice calm and even, only the slightest edge betraying his hunger and his pain. She listens and she weeps, for him, for her, for all the space that’s come between them. She weeps until her tears run dry, and then she quiets before fresh tears allow her to weep some more.
“Don’t cry, Caroline. I’m supposed to be the bad guy.”
She turns, damp eyes looking up at the covered window into the cell, remembering the thin light that filtered in through that small slit, the faint hope even such slight illumination brought her. She bites her lip, crawling up the door, pressing her forehead to the closed shutter, pressing her body up against the steel to feel something, anything besides the impact of his words and the resonance of his voice. She thinks if there are bad guys, they are not down here this morning and curls her fingers around the latch to slide the shutter free.
“Caroline?”
She wants to peer through the window into the cell, wants to see his face turned up into the dim light, perhaps straining in the dark to see her. She wants to, but she can’t, can’t hold his gaze with him still bound and her still on this side of his subjugation. She cinches her eyes shut, positions half of one within his sight, presses her palms flat against the door, and breathes. Her eyes snap open for one brief second, just long enough to catch a glimpse of her fallen saviour.
“I’m sorry, Stefan...”
And then she runs: into the sunlight, into the open air, into the freedom she can’t quite enjoy anymore.
a/n : this back catalogue entry was originally written and posted in 2011. We have preserved it's original format, and no additional editing or alterations have been done.
many thanks to @aniresrene, @velvourne, @sorryitsmyfirstdayonearth and @middleearthislife for the encouragement, the fics are being released.
Thank you for your patronage of The Roadhouse Library. Please consider supporting out project with likes, comments and reblogs.
Follow @roadhousearchives to stay current with new additions the archive's holdings.
I know absolutely nothing about TVD, BUT my super lovely, super talented friend wrote this, so if you are a fan, I can pretty much guarantee this will be a treat! 😁❤️
Summary: Dean may be gone but the memory of him lives on in the moments spent with the ones he loved the most in Baby.
How many miles do you think Dean’s Impala has under her belt? It’s hard to truly calculate. She’s been across the country and back again more times than anyone could probably count. He even somehow managed to get her to Alaska. Don’t ask me how he pulled that one off, but he did. Maybe if your feeling lucky, sit him down with a glass of that strong amber colored whiskey and he’ll pull out a map and pencil, start crunching the numbers. Tracing all the backroads and highways he’s took her through.
But that’s not really the point of this.
Because we know Dean has a bond with his car that goes beyond the metal, vinyl, and chrome. Baby held his life in her frame. She carried every version of him, little Dean sitting in the front seat with John, tired eyes trying their best to stay open on the long hauls. Teenage Dean gripping the wheel for the first time , sly smile on his face , thinking about the day he will finally get to take her out on his own. Hunter Dean covered in blood and grime, sometimes barely holding on until he can get to the next rest stop to patch up his wounds. Even a softer version of him, only those closest to him ever really got to see. And the people who loved and who knew him best, they understood that. Their memories of Dean are tied to that car too.
Jody remembers the practical things first. Dean and Sam showing up on a random day of the week, the rumble of the engine in her driveway. She’d remember Dean sliding out of the driver’s side, waltzing up trying to act tougher than he felt but she’d see the tired look in both of their eyes. They were grown men but underneath it all they were her boys. She’d usher him in along with Sam giving them a tight hug and making them a coffee or a hot meal. They’d talk for hours on end , catch up, and for a moment forget that their lives were sometimes covered in muck and blood. When the day was done she’d see them out , Dean promising to stop by again soon, a brighter smile on his face as he and Sam left her front porch and shed wave goodbye to them as she watched the Imapala drive away. She loved seeing that car in her driveway if she was honest, because it meant the boys were safe and alive. It meant backup. It meant she wasn’t alone.
Claire would remember Dean in the impala as an infuriating ‘old man’ but dependable. The kind of dependable in a way you don’t appreciate until later. She’d remember his lectures from the front seat, all gruff and edged with concerned, masked as annoyance. His hands would be tight on the wheel as he lectured her about something reckless, she did on a hunt. On the outside it was infuriating but she began to realize that it mattered to her more than she realized back then. It was because Dean always showed up when it mattered. To Claire the Impala was proof that even when Dean was gruff and annoying, even when he didn’t know how to say the right things, he still showed up, every time.
Garth remembers how sacred that car was to Dean. He’d probably joke that getting into the Impala felt like entering church where the gospel was classic rock and the saints were all heavily armed. But Garth understood it more than most. He’d remember how Deans whole face changed behind the wheel, how it calmed him, centered him, make him feel like himself. Garth knew that Baby was Deans safe place before he ever really had one.
Jack would remember all the lessons he learned from Dean. He’d remember him teaching him things from the front seat, not always patiently but in a way that Dean only knew how to show that he cared. He’d remember the music, the old box of tapes. Deans hand drumming on the steering wheel, the rules about no food. But one of his most cherished memories is the day Dean taught him how to drive. He was so nervous that day, white knuckling the steering wheel and riding the brakes. But when he finally got it, the way he drove Baby smoothly down that endless highway, glancing over at Dean who acted like it wasn’t a big deal, but the pride on his face told a different story. It was one of the best days of his human life.
Castiel would remember the strangeness of how much meaning one human could pour into an object. He didn’t understand it at first but over time, he would. The impala was where Castiel saw some of Deans most human moments, the exhaustion, the passion, the stubborn hope, and the unwillingness to give up on the people he loved. He remembers riding shotgun once, a quiet early evening, the sun setting on the horizon, his favorite tape in the deck and looking over at Dean. Understanding that this was as close to peace he ever got.
Sam would remember everything.
He’d remember being a kid, curled up in the backseat, half asleep while Dean tucked a blanket around him. He’d remember the motel parking lots, bruised knuckles on the steering wheel, arguments that always ended in silence. He’d remember the laughter too, dumb jokes, singing along to old songs, the way Dean always looked most like himself behind the wheel. He remembers every long haul with his big brother, all the roads and state lines they traveled across. He could sit you down and tell you exactly how many miles Baby had because every one of them he was there. He was so grateful to have been there.
And that’s what makes the thought of one last ride hurt so much.
Because it’s the pieces of Dean left behind in that car, worn seats, the box of tapes, the fingerprint on the steering wheel, the ghost of his laughter. The way everyone who ever loved him could climb into Baby, close the door, and find some version of him still there.
So this is how it goes, huh? You say you have a little headcanon thing you got lying around, gonna take a look at it and see if it's anything. And then you write THIS, and I'm tearing up after the first couple paragraphs. I see how it is! And then I hit the: He could sit you down and tell you exactly how many miles Baby had because every one of them he was there.
I would say don't ever do this again, except that I really, really hope you do it again! Besitos, lovely, this was incredible! ❤️
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality
Anya is LIVE right now
FREE
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
"You meet Sam and Dean Winchester on a hot summer afternoon when you’re seven. You don’t know it yet, but they will become the most important part of your life."
WARNINGS
This story is Sam x reader x Dean, as well as Dean x reader and Sam x reader.
Specific warnings can be found on the individual chapters, but here are some general ones I found important to mention ahead of time.
Neglectful parents. Referenced sexual abuse. Polyamory. Heartbreak. Pregnancy & child birth. Explicit sexual content.
A NOTE ON CANON DIVERGENCE
I've taken some big liberties with canon (I hardly know her) that will become apparent while reading, but here is the gist of it:
Mary Campbell makes a deal for her lover's life with a cross-roads demon and is killed by it ten years later. John goes on the hunt for the demon and takes his infant and toddler sons with him. Sam isn't fed demon blood. The brothers aren't the warriors chosen by heaven and hell to fight an apocalyptic battle.
They are just boys, not loved enough or not the right way. Rough around the edges.
They spend their summers at Bobby Singer's house in Sioux Falls. This is where they meet you.
PARTS & CHAPTER OVERVIEW
New chapters on Tuesdays and Thursdays.
PROLOGUE - If only things could be like this forever - 6/11/26
PART I masterlist - 6/11/26
PART II masterlist
PART III masterlist
PART IV masterlist
PART V masterlist
I want to thank @kblognar for their amazing help with this fic, for getting my head straight when I went down the rabbit hole and for loving the bbys probably nearly as much as I do. I also want to thank @ambiguous-avery @aniresrene @bettystonewell @jollyreads @aseafullofstars, all of who I have yapped at about this and who have been there to support and help! This was two years in the making and I am ready for this baby to see the world.❤️
"You meet Sam and Dean Winchester on a hot summer afternoon when you’re seven. You don’t know it yet, but they will become the most important part of your life."
WARNINGS
This story is Sam x reader x Dean, as well as Dean x reader and Sam x reader.
Specific warnings can be found on the individual chapters, but here are some general ones I found important to mention ahead of time.
Neglectful parents. Referenced sexual abuse. Polyamory. Heartbreak. Pregnancy & child birth. Explicit sexual content.
A NOTE ON CANON DIVERGENCE
I've taken some big liberties with canon (I hardly know her) that will become apparent while reading, but here is the gist of it:
Mary Campbell makes a deal for her lover's life with a cross-roads demon and is killed by it ten years later. John goes on the hunt for the demon and takes his infant and toddler sons with him. Sam isn't fed demon blood. The brothers aren't the warriors chosen by heaven and hell to fight an apocalyptic battle.
They are just boys, not loved enough or not the right way. Rough around the edges.
They spend their summers at Bobby Singer's house in Sioux Falls. This is where they meet you.
PARTS & CHAPTER OVERVIEW
New chapters on Tuesdays and Thursdays.
PROLOGUE - If only things could be like this forever - 6/11/26
PART I masterlist - 6/11/26
PART II masterlist
PART III masterlist
PART IV masterlist
PART V masterlist
I want to thank @kblognar for their amazing help with this fic, for getting my head straight when I went down the rabbit hole and for loving the bbys probably nearly as much as I do. I also want to thank @ambiguous-avery @aniresrene @bettystonewell @jollyreads @aseafullofstars, all of who I have yapped at about this and who have been there to support and help! This was two years in the making and I am ready for this baby to see the world.❤️
"You meet Sam and Dean Winchester on a hot summer afternoon when you’re seven. You don’t know it yet, but they will become the most important part of your life."
WARNINGS
This story is Sam x reader x Dean, as well as Dean x reader and Sam x reader.
Specific warnings can be found on the individual chapters, but here are some general ones I found important to mention ahead of time.
Neglectful parents. Referenced sexual abuse. Polyamory. Heartbreak. Pregnancy & child birth. Explicit sexual content.
A NOTE ON CANON DIVERGENCE
I've taken some big liberties with canon (I hardly know her) that will become apparent while reading, but here is the gist of it:
Mary Campbell makes a deal for her lover's life with a cross-roads demon and is killed by it ten years later. John goes on the hunt for the demon and takes his infant and toddler sons with him. Sam isn't fed demon blood. The brothers aren't the warriors chosen by heaven and hell to fight an apocalyptic battle.
They are just boys, not loved enough or not the right way. Rough around the edges.
They spend their summers at Bobby Singer's house in Sioux Falls. This is where they meet you.
PARTS & CHAPTER OVERVIEW
New chapters on Tuesdays and Thursdays.
PROLOGUE - If only things could be like this forever - 6/11/26
PART I masterlist - 6/11/26
PART II masterlist
PART III masterlist
PART IV masterlist
PART V masterlist
I want to thank @kblognar for their amazing help with this fic, for getting my head straight when I went down the rabbit hole and for loving the bbys probably nearly as much as I do. I also want to thank @ambiguous-avery @aniresrene @bettystonewell @jollyreads @aseafullofstars, all of who I have yapped at about this and who have been there to support and help! This was two years in the making and I am ready for this baby to see the world.❤️
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality
Anya is LIVE right now
FREE
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
"You meet Sam and Dean Winchester on a hot summer afternoon when you’re seven. You don’t know it yet, but they will become the most important part of your life."
WARNINGS
This story is Sam x reader x Dean, as well as Dean x reader and Sam x reader.
Specific warnings can be found on the individual chapters, but here are some general ones I found important to mention ahead of time.
Neglectful parents. Referenced sexual abuse. Polyamory. Heartbreak. Pregnancy & child birth. Explicit sexual content.
A NOTE ON CANON DIVERGENCE
I've taken some big liberties with canon (I hardly know her) that will become apparent while reading, but here is the gist of it:
Mary Campbell makes a deal for her lover's life with a cross-roads demon and is killed by it ten years later. John goes on the hunt for the demon and takes his infant and toddler sons with him. Sam isn't fed demon blood. The brothers aren't the warriors chosen by heaven and hell to fight an apocalyptic battle.
They are just boys, not loved enough or not the right way. Rough around the edges.
They spend their summers at Bobby Singer's house in Sioux Falls. This is where they meet you.
PARTS & CHAPTER OVERVIEW
New chapters on Tuesdays and Thursdays.
PROLOGUE - If only things could be like this forever - 6/11/26
PART I masterlist - 6/11/26
PART II masterlist
PART III masterlist
PART IV masterlist
PART V masterlist
I want to thank @kblognar for their amazing help with this fic, for getting my head straight when I went down the rabbit hole and for loving the bbys probably nearly as much as I do. I also want to thank @ambiguous-avery @aniresrene @bettystonewell @jollyreads @aseafullofstars, all of who I have yapped at about this and who have been there to support and help! This was two years in the making and I am ready for this baby to see the world.❤️
i'm so excited for this i could cry. it's been a tremendous privilege to tag along on this journey, and i'm so incredible excited for everyone else to read this whirlwind rollercoaster of emotion.
@sorryitsmyfirstdayonearth, it's truly amazing how hard and how diligently you've worked in service of your creativity here, it's an inspiration.
tldr; I am one proud papa.
Now, everybody buckle the fuck up and LET'S GOOOOO
"You meet Sam and Dean Winchester on a hot summer afternoon when you’re seven. You don’t know it yet, but they will become the most important part of your life."
WARNINGS
This story is Sam x reader x Dean, as well as Dean x reader and Sam x reader.
Specific warnings can be found on the individual chapters, but here are some general ones I found important to mention ahead of time.
Neglectful parents. Referenced sexual abuse. Polyamory. Heartbreak. Pregnancy & child birth. Explicit sexual content.
A NOTE ON CANON DIVERGENCE
I've taken some big liberties with canon (I hardly know her) that will become apparent while reading, but here is the gist of it:
Mary Campbell makes a deal for her lover's life with a cross-roads demon and is killed by it ten years later. John goes on the hunt for the demon and takes his infant and toddler sons with him. Sam isn't fed demon blood. The brothers aren't the warriors chosen by heaven and hell to fight an apocalyptic battle.
They are just boys, not loved enough or not the right way. Rough around the edges.
They spend their summers at Bobby Singer's house in Sioux Falls. This is where they meet you.
PARTS & CHAPTER OVERVIEW
New chapters on Tuesdays and Thursdays.
PROLOGUE - If only things could be like this forever - 6/11/26
PART I masterlist - 6/11/26
PART II masterlist
PART III masterlist
PART IV masterlist
PART V masterlist
I want to thank @kblognar for their amazing help with this fic, for getting my head straight when I went down the rabbit hole and for loving the bbys probably nearly as much as I do. I also want to thank @ambiguous-avery @aniresrene @bettystonewell @jollyreads @aseafullofstars, all of who I have yapped at about this and who have been there to support and help! This was two years in the making and I am ready for this baby to see the world.❤️
she’s hereeeee 🤎🤎 going to try my best to actually keep up with this one if I can 😩🥲 I’ve heard so many good things thus far :D🫶🏽 and ik you’ve been excited for it, congrats on starting to post it !! <3
