I am a Unicorn Wizard

say what u want about the manscaped ads I know they are shit, all of them but the “evil, sinister, malcontent, balls” one puts me into fucking hysterics actually

Worst little cunts on this site by far are those who respond to complaints about mundanely shitty behavior like “I can’t stand when people don’t put their grocery carts back” with “um did you know that .000001% of the world’s population has terminal Can’t Put Grocery Carts Back Disease maybe think before you post”

it’s kind of deeply depressing that there exists this entire vast subculture of progressive-learning 15-19 year olds online who are legitimately filled with anxiety over their media consumption diet and closely monitor themselves and others to make sure nothing they consume is Problematic™ lest they be ousted from their social circles. at the exact age where it’s actually good to have a varied media diet and be able to critically engage with harmful elements, too

straight up if you are high school or early university aged and you’re spending time feeling significant guilt and anxiety about what you choose to read or watch because of your online peers and shaping your media diet based on fear, you do not have to be around those peers anymore. there is a vast world outside this kind of person

me trying not to act high when my dad is home

which one is which

I don’t know how to explain to some discourse damaged people on the unholy trinity of social-media-websites-whose-names-start-with-a-T that romantic subplots in non romance media are not put there with the sole purpose of giving the audience the warm fuzzies; that, like any other element in a story, a romantic subplot should serve the themes and central thesis statement of its larger narrative; and that sometimes the most adequate choice of a pairing or approach to romance for a given story is not necessarily the one you personally think would be the cutest / healthiest / most progressive      

“this is not a healthy relationship!” okay, but is this detrimental to the type of story being told somehow? is it part of the point? is it well written and complex? does it complement the tone and ideas of the narrative? are you aware that romance in fiction exists to tell good stories and not being a life manual? that sometimes a dysfunctional love story can still be good as a story?  

This is actually probably the best summary of star wars I’ve ever seen

there should be a secret 8th day of the week just for playing dnd

Healthy relationships are clearly better in real-life but fucked-up ones are way more dramatically interesting in fiction. In much the same way–indeed, in exactly the same way–that feudal monarchy is a hell of a lot of fun in fantasy and historical fiction novels, but complete shit to actually live under.

Feudal monarchy is so hilarious because it’s just like: “What if we based our entire sociopolitical structure on fucked-up family dynamics?”