My book on asexuality and aromanticism, Love Expanded, is released today!!
When I first started writing, I thought it would just be a book explaining what ace and aro identities are. But the more I wrote, the more it became a book about how allonormativity hurts everyone.
It encourages everyone to believe they’re fundamentally incomplete without a romantic partner.
It makes people think a romantic partner is the only intimate, nurturing relationship they need, leaving them without a support network if that relationship fails.
It can lead to people feeling obliged to consent to sex they don't actively want, because it's the "normal" thing to do.
It means anyone perceived as “abnormal” gets desexualised by society (disabled people, neurodivergent people, fat people, etc).
It makes people afraid to leave abusive relationships because they’ve been told ‘love conquers all’ or that singledom is even worse than abuse.
It makes everyone think the default way for humans to live is in self-contained family units… when there’s no reason we shouldn’t live with friends, or have friends co-parent our children, and many many more options.
So if you’re interested in a book unpacking all of this and talking about the steps we can take to fix it, please do check it out! And happy Pride and Aro day <3
(US readers: because of some complicated publishing stuff ™ , physical copies won’t be available in the US until next spring. Some US people have been able to order copies either by changing their location or by using Amazon, though I understand many of us. Do Not Want to do that. :'D Ebooks should be available now though, or at least very soon!)
