SillyDzaan

kiss your local dragon. passionately.

I think flinching is such a hit or miss reflex. Like yea a tiny bit of boiling water touched my hand but i dont think reflexivly throwing the water everywhere is a good defensive measure perhaps. might be even worse actually

Something really needs to be said about the amount of queer shows with queer fandoms that are weirdly apathetic towards racism and misogyny.

reblog to tell prev she's a good girl

People keep responding to this saying it’s fake because “nobody has 40 friends” but they have no problem with the rest of the details. From this data I can extrapolate that everybody on this website knows like 3 people max but at least one of them is a chill knifeplay TSA girl.

They say that sudden, intense cravings for very specific foods are usually a sign of a vitamin deficiency. If so, that I'm presently making myself french toast, scrambled eggs, and a bacon and cheese sandwich at 11:45 PM must mean the vitamin I'm missing is grease.

I cross-posted this to Bluesky and got followed by a bunch of folks with blog headers clarifying which exact flavour of Christianity they adhere to because they thought I was making a hashtag-relatable post about cheating on your diet. Now we get find out how many of them are also comfortable with posts about werewolf cock.

casual survey: reblog if you want to kiss a girl right now

messed up that eyes are kinda the only body part it’s acceptable to get lost in

getting lost in her mouth

*opens up my map while in the kidneys* What in the fuck does any of this mean?

you can’t park there

downloaded an evil pirated rom of a classic video game off the dark web and the malevolent spirit inside it was fully intending to kill me until it hicjacked my webcam and saw my room and now it just feels sorry for me. yeah. it's helping me fill out job applications now. it saw me take down some empty bottles and it was genuinely really.proud of me. i think it sees itself as like a mother figure. when i do really good it lets me play my favorite levels but it changes things around a little so it feels new again because it knows i appreciate that and i deserve to be rewarded for beingnthe good girl i am. yeah. i dont even think its evil anymore i think its just really personally invested in me

Could you link where you got your muzzle? It's really cute :3

just had a disconcerting thought

assembly, help! my best friend was turned into a sentient sword by a hag 🥺 we accidentally trampled her bog garden while we were having a mud fight and she cursed her right there. she can still sort of communicate with me through hazy visions she implants in my head when I'm wielding her but they're difficult to decipher. we're on sentinel duty on the curtain wall together in a few hours and I have no idea what I'm going to do. has this happened to any of you before?

so. uh. when the captain asked where she was I just kinda shrugged and said I hadn't seen her that day, and no one else had (because we were out in the woods mudfighting) so he sent me out to look for her and I just went because what else am I supposed to do? 😮‍💨 she's with me at my hip and she keeps showing me visions of white tulips so I think I have to go apologise to the bog witch and beg her to fix this. wish me luck on my quest

uuuuuuurrrghhhh the hag says she'll only restore my friend to her natural form in exchange for THREE MOONS of service tending her garden. THREE. she's assigned me the spare room in her cottage to stay in whilst working for her which just so happens to be right on the other side of the wall from all the mushrooms and mosses we trampled earlier and I think they must be cursed because they're whispering insults to me through the window. this is wretched. there's only one tiny little bed in here and it seems rude to make my friend sleep on the floor or in my sheath so I have her lain next to me... fingers crossed I don't impale myself upon her while I slumber

ASSEMBLY.... I've had some. uhm. very strange dreams these last few nights. at first I thought it was the cursed mushrooms (they're definitely cursed, I asked the hag. one of them bit me and I passed out for like 15 minutes). but I think I'm getting my friend's dreams as I do the visions when I'm awake. dreams bathed in blood where I'm in the dead center of some flurrying battle or foul dungeon or twisting labyrinth surrounded by foes. and. well. my best friend is with me, in sword form. I'm wielding her. I swing her like the reaper's very scythe, cutting through flesh and bone, plunging and thrusting into warm bodies at their weakest points, her sharp edges raining their blood all over me... and it feels good. like. really good. she's loving it and I can feel that pleasure she feels as she swings through the air and cleaves into twitching muscle echoing through me. it's... exhilarating to say the least. I think maybe I've been talking in my sleep too because the witch has been not-so-subtley inquiring about the nature of my relationship with "that sword friend" of mine. getting ready in the morning has been a hassle what with all the, ahem, cleanup. not to mention it makes it really difficult to avoid getting bitten by the cursed mushrooms when flashes of the ecstacy of battleglory from the dual embodiments of both slayer and blade come at random throughout the work day while I've got her at my hip in my sheath, but I don't want to leave her alone inside, because that would be dreadfully boring for her, right? gentle folk... what am I to do?