hold me like a knife

Frederick Chilton would describe his bedroom as a "trans-inclusive space" and then he would do that stupid "I said something smart" half-smile and I'd tackle him into the earth for it

i feel like i'm going insane why does no one know that Richard Ayoade is a transphobic cunt

"my love of sherry started at age 7 and i got chicken pox. so i lost my appetite after i got chicken pox at the age of 7, my nan who was a matron in a hospital told my mum that the best way to get my appetite back was to give me sherry. so i would have the odd glass of sherry before a meal, if i was having melon or fruit shed pour sherry. so my love of sherry started there, it then continued when we got our first dog a spaniel when i was about 8. we used to take our dog for a walk down park mill which was this lovely place in the woods and there was a pub and a big car park and youd walk out the back and ther'd be the wood. and what was a really nice treat is that my dad would get the dog out the boot would lift and i would sit in the boot and theyd get the dog and go into the pub and get me a glass of sherry and id have my glass of sherry and wed go for a walk and that is why i think everything in life is better with a glass of sherry so if im going for a walk i would have a hipflassk full of sherry and its shaped as a fish because it would entice animals and if im going through a walk i would like to have animals come up to me and theyre not gonna look and go oo look its a metal hip flask adn oh my god it makes a noise and its scary. theyre gonna go i recognise this animal, it might have a fox. you might have a squirrel, you might have some mice, you could have a rat and they will go i recognise this animal its not gonna frighten me i will join the walk. not a drunk little girl, a drunk woman now. and at least they will feel at one with the fish and they'll probably like the sweetness of the smell of the sherry as well. i belive that does deserve more than one point because sherry will make us happy. when i was baout 7 i started having sherry and now oh my god i love nothing better on a sunday right i have like a roast dinner sit there do an oh my god im not like this all the time but i am i would have a jigsaw watch a murder mystery and just drink sherry. but you all would and youd all feel better with a glass of sherry. its never stopped i still like the sherry now. that is genuine the hip flask " - Joanna Page

the bad thing about having unhealthy habits due to mental illness, is when you DO do something healthy style you can't brag about about it because then people will then know you've been doing it yucky style all along. Like you can't brag you changed your sheets or brushed your teeth because then ppl will be like oh did you not brush your teeth regularly before? Thats yucky disgusting! So you just gotta keep it to yourself. And be proud alone, I suppose.

my losing dog and the winning dog are having a heated rivalry moment