GIVE ME 2 MORE YEARS / LET ME KNOW IF YOURE HIRING

hi my name is dark yagami and my goal is to give birth to billions of people

you have a disgusting storytelling addiction

It’s true. It goes back a long way, too. It all started when…

love that armand's solution to daniel saying that he has a contract with lestat and his band is to just start murdering them. that's one way to get your beloved out of it i guess

my 37 year old vampire girlfriend keeps telling me i simply don't understand the woes of immortality as if I didn't also own a VHS player or visit a blockbuster a few times as a kid

she keeps staring off into the distance saying those shit like "those as youthful as you know not what horrors lie in your past" even though we both know damn well she's talking about the 2008 financial crash

love between vampires can be one thing, or it can be many things. however you want me, i can be that for you. you said you want me to be present as your maker? i can be a maker for you. i want to be your maker. disregard the last 500 years in which i was repulsed by the idea. i don't have any complicated feelings about that at all. you said you want cool vampire powers even though you're a three year old fledgling? i can help you become a daywalker, a skill that apparently takes centuries to develop. you're an investigative journalist, don't you want a scandal on lestat? i can give you a scandal. i want to help you finish that job. lestat fucks his mom. isn't that good? aren't i useful? aren't i worth keeping around?

“I stalked you for 52 years and told my husband about it” jesus christ just have a threesome already

louis, telepathically : what's the latest update on our fascinating boy armand, watching daniel slobbering all over as he tries to deep throat him in between whimpers after doing cocaine mixed with blood off of armand's asscrack: uhhhhh he missed his daughter's recital and got fired from his job. nothing else to report