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okay first of all unclench your jaw

good god when the onions and garlic hit the olive oil..........

Panties hit the FLOOR

you know it sister

are we sure hannibal doesn’t have tumblr

hannibal au in which hannibal lecter runs a tradwife-esque nara smith style cooking instagram page where he prepares extravagant & elaborate meals from scratch while yapping about their historical relevance or something & he starts dropping progressively darker comments & "jokes" but no one catches it because its instagram & half of the comments are asking if they can make rabbit stew without rabbit & the other half are asking if hes gay

back to this for a sec. will starts making cameos in his videos but he never talks or anything he just shows up & steals a piece of raw carrot from the cutting board or leans against a wall in the background & hes always covered in motor oil or dirt or who tf knows (yo is that blood???) so everyone thinks hes the gardener or something but the way they interact with each other is #suspicious so everyone starts speculating about how dr lecter is banging the hired help. hannibal finds it equally offensive & entertaining because that is His Husband who he worships above anything else but also will my dove dont you think the idea that you are my employee & we are having a secret affair is somewhat arousing? & will is like hannibal we are not roleplaying that tell your insane fans we are married. they do in fact end up roleplaying that