No One Mourns The Wicked

You gotta be really publicly passionate about things if you want your friends to text you. Bc people will forget to text you because they’re human. But if you’re really openly the friend who loves identifying ants your friends will think of you when they see ants. And they’ll text you “what ant is this [blurry photo]”. And then they’ll ask you how you’ve been and we should get coffee sometime. But if they don’t know what you love they’ll never know what you like

And then when the ant convention is in town they’ll be like dude… we should go to the ant convention. But they would never think to go if they didn’t know u loved ants

And sometimes you need to ask them to go to the ant convention. But you Will not get anywhere hiding your passions

Your heart is not true enough to enter the gates of Margaritaville

My heart was heavier than the feather; I am sentenced to Rainforest Cafe

official linguistics post

one time i was at a week long youth conference for church stuff (who else exmormon and did efy?) and there was a few hundred of us or something so we were all split into these groups and the groups were obviously gendered bc it would be inappropriate for a fourteen year old boy to be encouraged to talk to a fourteen year old girl DUH. anyways our group of like fifteen or twenty girls or whatever. we were ordering pizza for the last day of the conference and every group had to tally up how hungry we were so they knew how much to order. and this was the last day of a week of twelve hour days and we were tired we had been taking class outside and it was hot as hell and etc. anyways we sat in a circle and our group leader who was the only adult woman there had us all take turns saying out loud to the circle how much pizza we thought we would eat so they could get a headcount for ordering. which. holy fuck what an awful way to do that? you put a huge group of young girls in a circle and had us all announce out loud how much we eat? anyways every SINGLE girl said "Oh Im Not Hungry I Just Want One Slice." until it got to me and i was like 3/4 the way around the circle and i said "To Be Honest i could have an entire medium hawaiian to myself right now but ill probably restrain myself to five pieces or something." and everypony started laughing because yes i was also the fattest girl in our group. but i was also kindof really brave as a 14 yo and i just kept going i genuinely said "I think you guys are being stupid because youre definitely hungry you just wont say it." and the leader was like "okay be real though how many slices?" and i said "im being serious Sister im so hungry and we have another four hours here including a soccer game. i want five or six slices of pizza." anyways after i did that big demonstration some of the girls following me said Two slices and one said Three. sometimes being the friendless heavy Bad girl is vital to the ecosystem and health of those around you. and btw they did get me a large hawaiian and let me take home what i didnt finish.

I think Spock could hang out with Squidward because they're the same type of cultured faggot but Squidward would get petty and mean about something and Spock would be like honestly mr tentacles I find this type of outburst very distasteful. & he would fix him

do they live in capitalist bikini bottom or socialist space future because the answer really affects whether spock fixes squiddy or systemic injustices change who spock is as a person.

I was imagining the enterprise comes to bikini bottom planet of the week style but I'm obsessed with the idea of spock working at the krusty krab & how that would affect him psychologically

"The magic system is never fully explained" yeah that's how life works. Imagine having a story set in modern day America and the characters have several pages of exposition on combustion engines and telecommunication networks before we get to the plot

i think this is absolutely correct and good writing advice but also victor hugo would like to have a word with you about the parisian sewer system circa 1832

victor hugo would like to have many words with you about the parisian sewer system circa 1831

there are apparently a lot of mushrooms that are poisonous to some people and edible for others. unlike food allergies, it’s not an allergic immune reaction, it’s mushroom poisoning but only for some people

Victor Frankenstein after achieving the impossible and building a fucking person from scraps of the dead: Oh god, ew, ew it's ugly! Yucky! Yucky! Gross! Ew! Ew! Yucky! Yucky! Gross! Ew!

I love stuff like this when people are in so deep they can’t even recognize how batshit crazy they sound

I think that part of what irks me about AI being used even for "small" stuff like meme graphics (aside from all the larger problems obviously) is like.... the time spent on it was part of the humor. "this is a silly inconsequential joke but I had to stop everything and spend 5 minutes making it" was, at least for me, part of the joke. Someone really took time out of their day to make me look at something silly they took time out of their day to make. Now it's like someone took time out of my day to make me look at something no one even made. Stop wasting my time if you aren't wasting yours too.

damn they ain't lying, it is like talking to a fucking genie with you people.

making cats use windows 8 is cruel and unusual