Meh Chicken Scratch

When we talk about conditions* like ADHD and autism, we’re talking about differences in how the brain processes information as opposed to the brain being in a state of illness. Our brain tissue is healthy, but the functioning of the brain is different. This is also known as a developmental difference. 

These differences results in patterns of strengths and weakness that are different to societal norms and expectations. 

These strengths and weaknesses are generally not unique to individuals with these conditions but instead exist along a Bell curve of natural human variation. Most people exist somewhere in the middle of the Bell curve (of course!) and will occasionally experience autistic and other traits from time to time.

This is because the traits of developmental differences are human traits, and we are all human.

If you never experience any of these traits, it means you are on one far end of the Bell curve rather than in the average middle. 

The difference between someone who is in the middle of the Bell curve and someone who has a condition like ADHD, is that the latter

Have a significant number of these traits;

Are affected by these traits in every area of their life or almost every area of their life on a daily or near-daily basis;

Have symptoms, behaviours, or problems are unexpected for someone of their age or intelligence;

Cannot overcome these symptoms by just “trying” or persisting;

Have had these problems since childhood;

May spend a great amount of effort and energy in trying to “keep up” and “be normal”; 

Experience these symptoms regardless of stress levels, lack of sleep, other mental health conditions, or external factors;

Experience significant problems and suffering for them across multiple areas of their life on a daily or near-daily basis;

Feel as though they are struggling due to these symptoms on a daily or near-daily basis;

Feel the world isn’t designed for people like them and doesn’t accommodate them;

Experience significant impairment in social, school, or work performance because of these difficulties.

While the idea that “everyone gets these things…” is somewhat true, it doesn’t take into account the frequency or severity of the problem for some people, or acknowledge how intrinsic such functioning is to an individual’s brain. 

When we say we struggle with these traits, we’re talking about how we live with this struggle as a significant aspect of our lives, not just merely that we have experienced a trait that most other people have experienced too. Our experience is about the frequency and severity of the thing, and how we have to constantly plan for it. We’re talking about what it’s like to live life far from the centre of the Bell curve.

When someone is trying to express what it is like to live with a processing difference, is not sympathetic to say that you know what it is like when you don’t, or to insist that everyone has the same thing. It is far better to ask questions to help the other person to open up, or to ask how you can help or make adaptations for them. 

If you don’t have a diagnosis but still genuinely believe that these problems are typical for everybody, you might want to consider that you might qualify for a diagnosis yourself.

I don’t think Tommy, Tubbo, Ranboo, Fundy, Quackity and the rest of L’Manburg have to, or even should, forgive Techno, Dream, Philza and Alivebur for blowing up their nation.

I don’t think Niki, Tommy, Techno and the rest of Pogtopia need to forgive Wilbur for what he did in Pogtopia. All though it’s clear that he was suffering from mental illness and trauma, that is an explanation not an excuse.

I don’t think Techno and Tommy have to forgive each other for betraying each other. Both of them had seperate goals and morals, and although they separated at a bad time, they were only going to end up butting heads more if they didn’t seperate. And trust me, I want bedrock bros back.

I don’t think Jack has to forgive Tommy for what he’s done. He shouldn’t have tried to kill him, but he doesn’t have to forgive him.

I don’t think Ghostbur has to forgive Philza for committing the same crime Ghostbur was killed for, and he doesn’t have to forgive Phil for killing Friend.

I especially don’t think Tommy has to forgive Alivebur or Dream for Pogtopia and Logstedshire. 

Forgiveness must be earned, yes, but it is not necessary. You all seem to put focus on forgiveness: the ex-L’Manburgians need to "just needs to see things for what they are, need to get past themself for once and give Wilbur a genuine concerned look.” (no shade nor hate to the person who said this btw - this is just the quote that made me write this hot take). But they don’t. They don’t have to “get past themselves”

Yes. Wilbur needs help. He has every reason to be looked at with concern. But the people he has hurt, willingly OR unwillingly, do not have to forgive him. It is not selfish to focus on yourself, and is is certainly not selfish to turn away people who have hurt you. Niki, Tommy, Phil, Techno, Tubbo, Quackity, Fundy, Karl, L’Manburg do not have to play doctor for Wilbur when he comes back. They don’t have to help or forgive him. He hurt them.

Technology has made a lot of changes in the way we communicate. When it’s face-to-face, we can get away with nods, that little ‘yeah, good point’ purse of the lips, raised eyebrows, that face-scrunch that just says ‘doubt’ … facial expressions, in short; really complex ones, often with an aural component. We read more from those than we realise, but at their base level, they show that we’re not only hearing the noises and nodding in the right places, but listening.

Enter the telephone. Suddenly a speaker can’t see where their conversational companion’s eyes are pointing, what they’re doing with their hands, what their posture’s like, or even if there’s someone on the other end of this bit of plastic they’re talking into. I imagine that aural aizuchi became common to the point of being considered a conversational necessity with the telephone, because when telecommunications technology was in its infancy, back in the days of party lines, it was shaky and unreliable (think Comcast) and there was every chance that your call could be disconnected without realising it. So interjecting with aural cues helped when it came to building trust in the communications medium that was the telephone.

When the internet turned up, it took away even the aural component, and the problem that arose with the telephone repeated itself on a grander scale. Not only could someone not necessarily be sure that someone was paying attention (yes, they might be online, but are they looking at the chat box or did they alt-tab out?), but any exchange was stripped of emotional content. The conversational cue words used to denote attention being paid can come across as sarcastic, dismissive or overly abrupt when stripped down to words on a screen, without the nuance lent to it by vocal tone and facial expression.

The solution? Create a whole new dialect, combining pictures and text to capitalise on a shared cultural foundation. If you’ve ever seen the ST:TNG episode “Darmok”, it’s a bit like that. There are a lot of different cultural cue points (thus “There’s a horse loose in a hospital!” instead of “Darmok and Jalad at Tanagra”), and we abbreviate a lot, but in principle, it’s the same. We communicate in metaphor, allowing our shared cultural background carry the emotional nuance that’s lacking in text alone.

What seldom gets brought up is how this has helped those who have issues parsing facial expressions. For some people, parsing all but the most basic facial expressions is a hit-and-miss exercise requiring a lot of work, and vocal tone hits them the same way. When we started communicating online in what I can only call a memetic dialect, we started conveying concrete, text-proven emotional context in our conversations. This must have been a relief for anyone who has difficulties reading facial expressions and vocal tones, since people can lie about what’s going on behind their face but an established cultural foundation at least pins down what their conversational partner or partners meant to convey. Also consider: when this memetic dialect came into use in face-to-face conversation, it gave a solid emotional context to certain words that can be referenced outside of the forum-and-text-chat medium. In short - words and phrases mean things and, once that meaning has been established, it carries over into whatever mode of conversation is in use.

excuse me what

i-

what

...

CONFIRM OR DENY

CONFIRM OR DENY

CONFIRM OR DENY

CONFIRM OR DENY