Certified Evil Scientist

Highlights include:

For your first two years (when you were small) you lived in a foster home with people who raised you into a very polite young man. Two is like you plus me, that's what two is.

Some people adopted you before me and they called you Timmy (which is a stupid name) and they returned your ass almost immediately because you were so annoying at that age.

Like think about how annoying you are right now at seven years old, but way worse.

I'm better than them though, I don't call you Timmy and I wore earplugs to bed for three years because you love to scream at bedtime. Earplugs are like when I roll over and go back to sleep even when you are yelling so so so loud.

I got you at a time in my life when I was really sick (being sick is like when I'm up late because I'm throwing up and you are a very handsome good boy who sits with me) and they had to put me asleep for a procedure. A procedure is like what happened to you when they put you asleep and took your balls away.

The Port Gamble S’Klallam Tribe made this card for their citizens to present to ICE.

If you are in a different federally recognized tribe in Washington State:

“I am a member of the (insert tribe here) Tribal Nation, which is Tribal Nation federally recognized by the United States.

This means I am also a United States citizen according to the U.S. Citizenship Act of 1924, 8 USC Section 1401.

Our tribe’s enrollment office number is (insert phone number here).

Dyke March London 2026

This shit is annoying enough when cis people do it but it especially gets on my nerves when I see other trans people buying into this nonsense

I've met far too many pre- or early transition trans people worried that medically transitioning is somehow conformist or some kind of personal failing, a temptation to be resisted.

Too many people have bought into this naturalistic notion that medical transition is a tragic symptom of a society that isn't accepting enough. That if our world was more enlightened people wouldn't need or want to alter their natural bodies.

Genuinely fuck that noise. Bodily autonomy rules and biohacking your endrocrine system is based actually.

Cancer is natural.

Diabetes is natural.

Cyanide is natural

Just because something is natural doesn't mean it's inherently good for you.

Setting aside medical necessity of transitioning for a second, if this society is supposedly accepting enough that people can express themselves and act however they want, then what's with this weird arbitrary line at people altering their physical form?

In a fully accepting society, I'd expect more people to medically transition, not less.

"You can look and act however you want so long as you don't change yourself in any way" isn't freedom, it's just reified cissexism.

You have to free yourself of the notion that unaltered, non medically transitioned bodies are ideal and inherently superior. It's not true. It's a lie you've been told to keep you from owning your own body.

It's okay to want to medically transition and, if you have the access and you have the ability, you are 100% allowed to do it.

Medically transitioning is a good thing and should be freely accessible to anybody who wants or needs to medically transition. Saying that isn't transmedicalist, it's what's necessary for real trans liberation.

I wholeheartedly reject the notion of describing medical transition as "binarist" and "conformist" and I'm sorry if this comes across as bitchy but biohacking your endocrine system or getting a surgeon to perform gentital origami on you is actually pretty radical defiance against naturalistic cisnormativity.

"You have to free yourself of the notion that unaltered, non medically transitioned bodies are ideal and inherently superior. It's not true. It's a lie you've been told to keep you from owning your own body."

^this mentality is the basis for an enormous amount of restrictions on trans helathcare. Even if you don't view yourself as being on the "same side" as conservatives who call our bodies "mutilated", you may be driven by the same forces.